ANT MACPHERSON'S BASIC RULES OF LIFE
1. DOGS ARE BETTER THAN PEOPLE.
2. THE MORE YOU SAY, THE LONGER THEY GROUND YOU FOR.
3. LYING ONLY WORKS IF YOU KEEP IT SHORT.
4. NEVER BE NICE TO PEOPLE WHO MAKE FUN OF YOU.
5. IT'S OKAY TO KEEP A CHICKEN IN YOUR HOUSE, SO LONG AS HE'S HOUSEBROKEN.
6. MAKE SURE SCHOOL DOESN'T GET IN THE WAY OF IMPORTANT THINGS LIKE YOUR FRIENDS.
7. DON'T WASTE THE TRUTH ON PEOPLE WHO WON'T UNDERSTAND.
"Antonia," my mother's voice shoots out, "don't play your games with me. You're not adopted and you know it."
"Mrs. MacPherson," says the assistant principal, "I'm sure we can straighten this all out."
"What about your dad?" asks Just Carol. "Is he your real father?"
"No," I say, "I have a whole other family. Only Pistachio is real. He's my real dog. When my real parents come, he's going with me."
For Antonia MacPherson, lying is a way of life. If it weren't for her best friend, Harrison, and a tiny ball of fluff named Pistachio, she would be miserable. No matter what she does, her mother thinks she's wrong. Her younger sister, Katherine the Great, takes notes on Ant's misbehaviors, which she keeps in a spiral notebook for their parents. Her older sister, Your Highness Elizabeth, says Ant is in training to be a juvenile delinquent, Harrison smells like a salami sandwich, and Pistachio should be put out of his misery. With all those royal opinions, who's going to listen to an Ant?
But when a teacher takes Ant under her wing, Ant's way of life may have to change. Just Carol likes the truth. And she won't take anything less.
