New Year, Same Trash: Resolutions I Absolutely Did Not Keep (A Vintage Short)

By: Samantha Irby

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Synopsis: Comedian, blogger and essayist Samantha Irby is not going to be a better person this year than she was last. Nope. With a small group of woo-woo others, Irby sets seventy micro-resolutions, and then—with the rest of us—she fails at almost every single one of them. A Vintage Shorts Original. An ebook short.Thoughtful, witty, poignant—the failed intentions in New Year Same Trash will make you laugh and cry. Because you know you&’ve been there. You can&’t wake up in time to go to brunch. Swimming three times a week? Who are you kidding. You&’re not going to shower every day or pack your lunch every day. You&’re definitely not going to choose a smart movie over mindless entertainment, because you&’re tired. You&’re lazy. And, no, you&’re never going to be a positive thinker. &“I didn&’t do this. I&’m gonna. Maybe.&” Don&’t worry. It&’s okay. There&’s always next year. Instantly recognizable to anyone who&’s ever failed to make goals and stick with them, New Year Same Trash will bring hilarious relief.Don't miss Samantha Irby's bestselling new book, Quietly Hostile!