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Ever since John Hancock broke into song after signing the Declaration of Independence, American politics and musicals have been inextricably linked. From Alexander Hamilton's jazz hands, to Chester A. Arthur's oboe operas, to Newt Gingrich's off-Broadway sexscapade, You, Me, and My Moon Colony Mistress Makes Three, government and musical theater have joined forces to document our nation's long history of freedom, partisanship, and dancers on roller skates pretending to be choo choo trains. To celebrate this grand union of entrenched bureaucracy and song, the patriots at McSweeney's Internet Tendency ("The Iowa Caucus of humor websites") offer this riotous collection (peacefully assembled!) of monologues, charts, scripts, lists, diatribes, AND musicals written by the noted fake-musical lyricist, Ben Greenman. On the agenda are . . . Fragments from PALIN! THE MUSICAL Barack Obama's Undersold 2012 Campaign Slogans Atlas Shrugged Updated for the Financial Crisis Your Attempts to Legislate Hunting Man for Sport Reek of Class Warfare A 1980s Teen Sex Comedy Becomes Politically Uncomfortable Donald Rumsfeld Memoir Chapter Title Or German Heavy Metal Song? Noises Political Pundits Would Make If They Were Wild Animals and Not Political Pundits Ron Paul Gives a Guided Tour of His Navajo Art Collection Classic Nursery Rhymes, Updated and Revamped for the Recession, As Told to Me By My Father And much more!
As John Hodgman says in this book's introduction, "We all know that books are funny. First, they are made of paste and cloth, which is funny, as is the fact that people still buy and read them." With that in mind, the McSweeney's Joke Book of Book Jokes collects the best book-related humor from the humor-laden archives of McSweeney's Internet Tendency. Open it and be regaled by such sketches, lists, letters, and spoofs as:Postcards from James Joyce to his Brother StanWinnie-the-Pooh is My CoworkerIkea Product or Lord of the Rings Character?Popular Children's Fairy Tales Reimagined Using Members of My FamilyThe Very Unauthorized Biography of Steven Seagal Chuck Norris EroticaJohn Updike, Television WriterJane Eyre Runs for PresidentCormac McCarthy Writes to the Editor of the Santa Fe New MexicanHolden Caulfield Gives the Commencement Speech to a High SchoolLetters from Odysseus's College RoommateAnd many dozens more.From the Trade Paperback edition.
If a mountain man felt compelled to dance, how would he do it? If koala bears could talk, what would they say? And what's the right pickup line, if you're a necrophiliac? (Maybe "I'm pretty sure I'm not going to get you pregnant.") In the throes of debates like these, we're lucky to have the learned people of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, America's best low-budget humor website, and their edifying work. From their best-looking writers comes this collection of over three hundred lists, including..."Signs Your Unicorn Is Cheating on You.""Errors in Communication Between My Hairdresser and Me, in the Form of What I Said and What He Heard""Things This City Was Built On, Besides Rock 'n' Roll""Things This One Girl Sitting Near Me in a Movie Theater Said Out Loud When One of the Characters Was Shown Pulling Into a Gas Station""Future Winners of the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest""Adjectives Rarely Used by Wine Tasters""The Collected Apologies of Lawrence H. Summers, President of Harvard""Exactly What I Mean When I Say My Ex-Girlfriend Kristin and I 'Wanted Different Things from Life'"And much, much more...
A collection of stories for wise young people and immature old people!A collection of stories for wise young people and immature old people, written by today's best authors spinning new tales. Each story features fullcolor illustrations by artists including Barry Blitt, Lane Smith, David Heatley, and Marcel Dzama.The collection includes previously unpublished children's stories from Jonathan Safran Foer (Everything Is Illuminated), Nick Hornby (High Fidelity), Neil Gaiman (Sandman), George Saunders (CivilWarLand in Bad Decline), Kell Link (Stranger Things Happen), and Jon Scieskza (The Stinky Cheese Man).From the Trade Paperback edition.