Why Can't You Shut Up?

By:

Synopsis
"You forgot to buy milk!""You never said anything about milk.""Yes, I definitely did. You never listen.""I do too listen. You never said milk.""No, I did say milk. You just don't listen."We've all been in situations like this one-when a loved one unintentionally provokes a confrontation. What do we do? We stand our ground, push our point, and underscore our reasons. We do it because we know we're right. What is it, deep inside our being, that refuses to budge, to give in, or to shut up before we're embroiled in a fight we don't want? Meet your baby self. According to Dr. Anthony Wolf, this childish personality comes out at home, at work, and in social settings-with spouses, significant others, colleagues, and even friends. The baby self doesn't know when to back down, it doesn't compromise, and it can lead you to make rash and, usually, wrong decisions. In this humorous, helpful, and eye-opening guide, you'll learn how to deal with your baby self when it wreaks havoc on your life. Dr. Wolf provides alternate ways of responding to others when your baby self is ready to scream: It's not fair! It's not my fault! You are wrong! He offers ways to avoid the traps that sabotage all relationships, helps us recognize the false reasons we trick ourselves into thinking we are right, and teaches us how to let our mature side do the talking. With scores of examples of how innocent day-to-day conversations can erupt into conflagrations, Dr. Wolf shows you how to disengage fast and easily. The result? Peace, positive dialogue, and happier relationships all around-even if deep down you know you are right!From the Hardcover edition.
Copyright:
2006

Book Details

Book Quality:
Publisher Quality
ISBN-13:
9780307417763
Related ISBNs:
9780345460936
Publisher:
Random House Publishing Group
Date of Addition:
Copyrighted By:
Anthony Wolf
Adult content:
No
Language:
English
Has Image Descriptions:
No
Categories:
Nonfiction, Self-Help, Psychology
Submitted By:
Bookshare Staff
Usage Restrictions:
This is a copyrighted book.

Reviews

5 out of 5

By on

I hate to admit that I love self-help books. But I am also disappointed by the majority with their cookbook solutions and their mystical new-age prescriptions. Here's something new in self-help; a book that helps you really, truly stop arguing with your family. It works even if you don't feel you are the cause of the fights. It helps even if you wish the other person would change. And it helps even if you aren't in conflict with anyone at the moment. By sharing many samples of conversation, and showing where the adult disappears and the "baby self" takes control, this book helps you focus on how to communicate in ways that don't set other people off. Not only do you learn what to say but why you sometimes don't say the right things, why others say crazy things, and why most people seem so irrational and how to deal with that, especially in the heat of debate. Best of all, this book doesn't feel like the author simply padded a short article. Each chapter has new insights so you needn't worry that after reading the first few pages you've heard everything the author has to telll you.


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