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The Great Book of Mobile Talk: You Like Mashed Potato, Don’t you?
by Andrew BarrowOverheard mobile pronouncements are a modern phenomenon. In the street, in the park, in supermarkets, buses, waiting rooms and even, heaven help us, in libraries, it’s quite impossible to get away from these tasty or repellent fragments of other people’s private lives. Wherever you lurk, their outbursts of despair or irritation ring out: mega-tantrums, in-jokes, celebrity spottings, instant post-mortems, office politics, whoops of joy and anger, weather reports, devilishly dull domestic details, parental problems, health issues, holiday plans, money matters, dinner menus, ultimatums, gossip, sporting news, amorous overtures, business deals – and any number of time-wasting pleasantries.From the stunningly mundane to the shockingly direct, the sublime to the ridiculous, here is a brilliantly curated collection of overheard mobile conversational gems.
A Genius for Failure: The Life of Benjamin Robert Haydon
by Paul O'Keeffe* Haydon's first attempt at suicide ended when the low calibre bullet fired from his pistol fractured his skull but failed to penetrate his brain. * His second attempt also failed: a deep slash across his throat left a large pool of blood at the entrance to his studio, but he was still able to reach his easel on the opposite side of the room. *Only his third attempt, another cut to the throat which sprayed blood across his unfinished canvas, was successful. He died face-down before the bespattered 'Alfred and the First British Jury', his final bid 'to improve the taste of the English people' through the High Art of historical painting.* Such intensity, struggle and near-comic inability to succeed encapsulate Haydon's career. Thirty years before his death his huge, iconic paintings had made him the toast of early 19th-century London, drawing paying crowds to the Egyptian Hall in Piccadilly for months and leading to nationwide tours. * However, his attempt to repeat such success three months before his death was to destroy him: barely a soul turned up, leaving the desperate painter alone, humiliated, and facing financial ruin. * In A Genius for Failure Paul O'Keeffe makes clear that the real tragedy of Haydon lay in the extent to which his failures were unwittingly engineered by his own actions - his refusal to resort to the painting of fashionable portraits, for example, and his self-destructively acrimonious relationship with the RA.* The company he kept - Keats, Shelley, Wordsworth, Sir Robert Peel and the Duke of Wellington, among many others - and the momentous events he lived through - The Battle of Waterloo, the Coronation of George IV, and the passing of the first Parliamentary Reform Bill - make A Genius for Failure not only the definitive biography of this fascinating and tragic painter, but a stirring portrayal of an age.
Glutton: The Multi-Course Life of a Very Greedy Boy
by Ed Gamble‘This book made me laugh and then order an unholy amount of takeaway.’ GREG DAVIES‘One of my favourite comics has now written an annoyingly great book.’ ROMESH RANGANATHAN‘Full of belly laughs and full bellies, this book is warm, honest and wonderfully entertaining.’ TOM KERRIDGE'One of the funniest comedians in the world, Ed is only serious about one thing - dinners.'NISH KUMAR---The hilarious memoir from comedian, Off Menu host and Great British Menu judge, Ed Gamble.From a young age, Ed Gamble's immaculate bibs and extremely dirty nappies hinted at his capacious appetite. Before he could walk, Ed already knew that he preferred poached salmon to puree, that celery was a calorie-sapping waste of time, and that mashed potatoes should be made with lashings of butter.Whilst he might ordinarily have been upset by the calls of 'precocious little sh*t' coming from his family, he was too busy stuffing his gob and staging rebellions against the patronising list of misery that is a children's menu.In Glutton, Ed shares a relatable buffet of experiences and stories from a life lived through food. From the trials of being a diabetic with a sweet tooth to his teenage battles with obesity, to the joy of cooking and the power of food to bring us together, this is a wonderful, hilarious and heart-warming memoir of a delightful obsession.
The Gobbler
by Adrian EdmondsonJulian Mann, the hard drinking, preening, and sexually provocative star of the TV sitcome Richard the Nerd, feels caught on the horns of a dilemma: should he be concentrating on his career, which is on the slide after an unseemly bout of fisticuffs at the BAFTA awards; or following his baser instincts and bedding every young girl in sight?His twin dreams of comic immortality and a penthouse flat full of booze and young models seem to be frustrated by his wife and children; by Tom, his wife's best friend from university days, a pretentious 'National Theatre Player' who appears to be competing with Julian on the small sreen and in the bedroom; by the tax man, who's chasing him for sixty thousand pounds; and by Lillith, a psychotic fan, and member of a strange Herculean cult whose eight-year cycle of death and regeneration might augur Julian's imminent nemesis...
The Gift of a Radio: My Childhood and other Train Wrecks
by Justin Webb'Searingly honest... gripping... fascinating and hugely entertaining.'- Sunday Times'Moving and frank ... A story of a childhood defined by loneliness, the absence of a father and the grim experience of a Quaker boarding school. It is also one of the most perceptive accounts of Britain in the 1970s.'- Misha Glenny'A crisp, unself-pitying memoir of a 'trainwreck' youth ... I've always likes Webb on the radio. But I like him much more after reading this book. He offers precisely the kind of brisk honesty and considered analysis he expects from his interviewees. Our politicians should all read it, and step up their game.' -Telegraph.........................................................................................................................................................Justin Webb's childhood in the 1970s was far from ordinary.Between his mother's un-diagnosed psychological problems, and his step-father's untreated ones, life at home was dysfunctional at best. But with gun-wielding school masters and sub-standard living conditions, Quaker boarding school wasn't much better.Candid, unsparing and darkly funny, Justin Webb's memoir is as much a portrait of a troubled era as it is the story of a dysfunctional childhood, shaping the urbane and successful radio presenter we know and love now.........................................................................................................................................'I thoroughly enjoyed Justin Webb's bonkers childhood. He captures the middle class of the age with a tenacity only possible in one of its victims.' -Jeremy Paxman
Gwen Raverat: Friends, Family and Affections
by Frances Spalding'The best of these Darwins is that they are cut out of rock - three taps is enough to convince one how immense is their solidarity.' So wrote Virginia Woolf affectionately of Gwen Raverat, the granddaughter of Charles Darwin. In this first full biography, Frances Spalding looks beyond the artist Gwen Raverat's childhood memoir; Period Piece, and creates a fascinating and moving portrait of Charles Darwin's granddaughter. She explores her Darwin inheritance; her conflicts when she moves beyond her home environment to enter the Slade School of Art; her encounter with post-Impressionism; and her friendships with Stanley Spencer, Rupert Brooke and members of the Bloomsbury set. At each stage, Gwen's artistic creativity is interwoven with her relationships and circumstances. She helps revive the medium of wood-engraving and with her husband, Jacques Raverat, celebrates the South of France in the art they produce while living in Venice. Drawing on a huge cache of unpublished papers, Spalding brings us a life lived with bravery, humour; realism and integrity, surrounded by a remarkable cast of relatives, friends and associates.
Gypsy Bride: One girl's true story of falling in love with a gypsy boy
by Sam Skye Lee'I felt like Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White and all the other fairy-tale princesses, and Pat was my Prince Charming.'Sam Skye Lee had often thought about getting married, but never imagined that her dress would be bright pink with flashing lights and weigh a staggering 20-stone. But then she didn't count on having a gypsy wedding...It's rare for a 'gorger', or non-traveller, to marry into the gypsy community. But after a shocking childhood tragedy, Sam found the comfort she needed from an unxpected source - Patrick and his family of travellers.Gypsy Bride is the heartwarming true story of how an ordinary girl finds herself discovering an extraordinary world. A place where 'grabbing' is a sign a boy fancies you, six-year-olds get spray tans, and christenings, weddings and funerals are jaw-droppingly flamboyant.This love story is more than boy meets girl. It's about a girl who falls in love with a whole race of people and their wonderful ways.
Harry Styles
by Alice MontgomeryFind out all about Harry Styles - the sexiest member of the hottest boy band on the planet - in this Sunday Times bestselling biography by Alice Montgomery. When Harry Styles auditioned for the X-Factor, little did he know he'd soon be leaving behind school, his Saturday bakery job, obscurity and an ordinary life. One Direction made it to the final and won a record deal, and it wasn't long before Harry's face covered bedroom walls up and down the country. But how did Harry cope with his new-found fame? And what happens when you take America by storm in a 'British Invasion'? With gorgeous green eyes and curls that send girls wild, Harry has found himself surrounded by beautiful women. But what's the truth behind the rumours? Here, his relationships with Caroline Flack, Taylor Swift and the married Lucy Horobin are laid bare. And what next for Harry and 1D? This book by Alice Montgomery will give you the low down on how Harry Styles and the rest of 1D are set to take on the world.Alice Montgomery works in London and is a freelance author. She has written several bestselling biographies, including Susan Boyle: Dreams Can Come True and Katy Perry.
Have I Said Too Much?: My Life In and Out of The Model Agency
by Carole WhiteThere are model agents and there is Carole White …Every decade in Carole White’s life has been extraordinary, from her childhood in Colonial Ghana, her rebellious teenage years and own modelling career, to spending 30 years at the helm of her iconic London agency Premier.Christy, Naomi, Linda, Claudia, Cindy … White has shaped the careers of the most superlative names ever to grace a catwalk and was at the centre of the 90s supermodel storm in all its glory, drama and excess.There have been landmark court cases, size zero debates, tantrums and triumphs. And who could forget her starring role as the much-loved ‘witch’ in award-winning reality show The Model Agency?Carole’s got opinions and she’s not afraid to share them. Have I Said Too Much? is the frank and revealing story of the grande dame of modelling, as well as an exclusive insight in to this thrilling, glamorous and chaotic industry.
Hayley Westenra: In Her Own Voice
by Darren Henley Hayley WestenraHayley's first performance as 'Little Star' in a Christmas play was perfectly pitched, beautifully sung and enthusiastically received. She was six years old. Now, at the tender age of twenty, she is the fastest-selling debut classical artist ever. Her string of musical accolades is astonishing and her audiences range from royalty to premiers.This is her story, from her first performance, through later roles in major productions such as Annie, La Bohème and The Sound of Music, her decision at the age of eleven to busk for her lunch money, and the subsequent record deals, money, charity work and classical superstardom.
He Who Dares
by Derek 'Del TrotterJack-the-lad, wheeler-dealer and international playboy (just ask the manageress of El Sid's, Torremolinos, 1978), this was a man destined for greatness. One day he would mature into an award-winning man of business*, thriving entrepreneur and glittering member of the jet-set. A force of nature, a man who beat the odds, if only for a bit. This is his story. The story of Derek 'Del Boy' Trotter. Who else could tell the glorious tale of rags to riches to rags to rich(ish) but the man himself? You've heard of The Wolf of Wall Street, now meet the Pug of Peckham.*Trotter's Independent Traders, employee of the year 1982 - 2003[He Who Dares has been written by the family of John Sullivan, creator and writer of Only Fools and Horses, who sadly died in 2011. Ebury Press have produced and published the book with full support and involvement of the family.]
A Head Full of Music: The soundtrack to my life
by Cliff RichardForeword by Bob StanleyOn a sunny Saturday morning in May 1956, a fifteen-year-old, then called Harry Webb, was mooching down Waltham Cross High Street. He heard some music blaring out of a parked car. It stopped him in his tracks.The song was 'Heartbreak Hotel' by Elvis Presley. It sounded like nothing he had ever heard before. In that instant, the schoolboy who was destined to take the hit parade by storm as Cliff Richard fell in love with rock and roll. It gave him the thrill, the purpose and the mission that has shaped his life ever since.Cliff lives in and for music. And with 65 years as a hitmaker, the music filling his head is a broad category. His soundtrack begins by blasting us all back into that first life-changing explosion of rock and also includes great soul soul stars such as Aretha Franklin, longtime colleagues like Elton John, and much-missed close friends Cilla Black and Olivia Newton-John.This book is meaningful to Cliff on many levels. The 30 or so songs here that make up the soundtrack to his life have each moved him deeply, but it's also about the legendary artists he met, and often got to know. He shares those stories and memories with you, too.A Head Full of Music is a vibrant personal journey for Cliff, and it's a joy to accompany him on it. Get wired for sound with him and read on.
Happy
by Keith Gray'Hundreds of people want to be in a band. They all get guitars and they all play gigs and they all write songs, and they still never make it.'There's a big difference between being a rock star and a pop idol - Will and Danny know which they'd prefer to be. They form the group Happy and it seems they are on the way to realising their ambitions. But when Happy's first gig is cut short by a fire at the venue, Will struggles to cope with his bitter disappointment and retreats into his private world, rejecting everyone around him. His girlfriend, Beth turns to Danny for comfort and their friendship soon becomes something more. With nothing left for him at home, Will leaves for London to stay with his session-musician father and to follow his dream.
The Glossy Years: Magazines, Museums and Selective Memoirs
by Nicholas Coleridge'The most entertaining book of the year' Sunday Times _____________________________________________________Diana touched your elbow, your arm, covered your hand with hers. It was alluring. And she was disarmingly confiding."Can I ask you something? Nicholas, please be frank..."Over his thirty-year career at Condé Nast, Nicholas Coleridge has witnessed it all. From the anxieties of the Princess of Wales to the blazing fury of Mohamed Al-Fayed, his story is also the story of the people who populate the glamorous world of glossy magazines. With relish and astonishing candour, he offers the inside scoop on Tina Brown and Anna Wintour, David Bowie and Philip Green, Kate Moss and Beyonce; on Margaret Thatcher's clothes legacy, and a surreal weekend away with Bob Geldof and William Hague. Cara Delevingne, media tycoons, Prime Ministers, Princes, Mayors and Maharajas - all cross his path.His career in magazines straddles the glossies throughout their glorious zenith - from the 1970s, 1980s and 1990s to the digital iterations of the 21st century. Having cut his teeth on Tatler, and as Editor-in-Chief of Harpers & Queen, he became the Mr Big of glossy publishing for three decades.Packed with surprising and often hilarious anecdotes, The Glossy Years also provides perceptive insight into the changing and treacherous worlds of fashion, journalism, museums and a whole sweep of British society. This is a rich, honest, witty and very personal memoir of a life splendidly lived.__________________________________________________________'An entertaining whirlwind' Evening Standard'Gentle, jolly . . . Blissfully funny' Sunday Telegraph'An irresistible read, hilarious, honest and insightful. I adored it' Tina Brown'Sparkling' Spectator'Forthright, witty and gossipy . . . a passion for glossy magazines shines through this effervescent memoir' Sunday Express
Headlines and Hedgerows: A Memoir
by John CravenTake a trip down memory lane with the memoir from national TV treasure John Craven, as he recounts both the highs and lows of one of the longest entertaining careers in history, and the people and animals that have helped to shape it. _______'A cracking read' Chris Evans, Virgin Radio Breakfast Show_______He began by reading the front page of the evening newspaper in the kitchen to his mother and aunt. Since then he's spoken into microphones to the nation on the BBC almost every week for more than half a century and is one of the most-beloved broadcasters of our time. Presenter of treasured programmes Newsround, Countryfile and Swap Shop, John brought us the headlines and breaking news of our childhood and later helped us discover the magic and wonder of the British countryside. Now, in his first ever autobiography, he recounts a life in news starting with the Grimthorpe Street Gazette, the handwritten newspaper he produced in his early teens - just one copy at a time, so small beginnings. Later, broadcasting on television to millions of children, his casual style of news-reading even found his jumpers making news. He writes about his childhood, his career and the people, events - and animals - that have shaped his life. This is John Craven. And this is the story behind the man so many of us grew up watching on our television screens._______'Magical memoirs. A BBC legend. A broadcasting icon. The best bits from cub reporter to Countryfile . . . his early career sounds like a riot' Daily Mail
Hard Knocks & Soft Spots
by Paddy Doherty'I fight hard and love strong. I'm a traveller.'Paddy Doherty loves his life as an Irish traveller, but as a child he felt like an outsider. He was different to his siblings. On the rare occasions he went to school, he was bullied for being a gypsy boy. And beyond the gates of the camp he found nothing but hostility. Slowly, Paddy's hurt turned into anger and by the age of 11 he had started out on an illustrious career in bare-knuckle fighting. This earned him a position as one of the most well-respected (and feared) men in the travelling community. Yet while he won countless contests in the ring, the real battles he faced were very much outside.In this deeply honest autobiography, he tells of how he has loved and lost five children; plummeted to seven stone while battling depression, drink and drugs. He describes how it feels to be shot point-blank in the head and the lengths he'll go to to protect his people, as well as life since My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding and Big Brother.Told with all the warmth and humour he is famed for, Paddy's rich and colourful story is one that will stay with you for a long time to come.
High Hopes: My Autobiography
by Ronnie CorbettA true great of British comedy, Ronald ‘Ronnie’ Corbett, is hailed as one of the finest comedians of his generation.Son of an Edinburgh baker, Ronnie rose to fame as one half of the infamous Two Ronnies alongside Ronnie Barker. Known for his versatility, quick-wit, family-friendly dialogue, and meandering monologues, Corbett was a staple of British television for more than 50 years. In his autobiography, he tells the complete story, from his school technique of estimating the height of a girl before daring to ask her to dance, to his days as a night club barman in London, and finally, to his decades long career as a stand-up and sitcom star. Including tales of how he first met David Frost, John Cleese and Michael Palin, this book is written with all of Ronnie’s trademark warmth and wit.Celebrating his life and career, this is Ronnie’s own honest and definitive account of his truly dramatic journey.
How to Grow Old: A middle-aged man moaning
by John BishopSUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLERWhether he likes it or not, John is getting older. His hair is greying, it’s getting that much harder to stay fit, and the potential to become something of an embarrassment is ever increasing.But hope is not lost. How to Grow Old is John’s offering to the world. With sage advice on how to avoid the common pitfalls of age, intimate confessions and spit-your-dentures-out hilarious commentary on his own advancing years, this is his observational comic writing at its very best. If you were concerned about how not to be boring or how to get rid of your should-be-old-enough-to-manage kids, this the book has the answers.
How Hard Can It Be?: The World According to Clarkson Volume 4 (The World According to Clarkson)
by Jeremy ClarksonHow Hard Can it Be? is the fourth hilarious volume in Jeremy Clarkson's The World According to Clarkson series.How hard can it be...To build a power station without upsetting the eco-mentalists? To seek world domination if you've been hit the ugly stick? For the Met Office to get yesterday's weather right?In volume four of The World According to Clarkson, Jeremy Clarkson pours scorn on the nonsensical, the dumb, the idiotic and the plain foolish in his continuing quest to discover where exactly we've all gone wrong.Along the way he ponders:• Whether conquering France might solve the immigration problem• What happened when you ignore proper warning labels • What would happen if we turned the internet offOften controversial, frequently scathing but always funnier than James May, Jeremy Clarkson shows us how we could so easily make the world a better place. Praise for Jeremy Clarkson:'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time OutNumber-one bestseller Jeremy Clarkson writes on cars, current affairs and anything else that annoys him in his sharp and funny collections. Born To Be Riled, Clarkson On Cars, Don't Stop Me Now, Driven To Distraction, Round the Bend, Motorworld, and I Know You Got Soul are also available as Penguin paperbacks; the Penguin App iClarkson: The Book of Cars can be downloaded on the App Store.Jeremy Clarkson because his writing career on the Rotherham Advertiser. Since then he has written for the Sun and the Sunday Times. Today he is the tallest person working in British television, and is the presenter of the hugely popular Top Gear.
Hello Again: Nine decades of radio voices
by Simon ElmesIt’s now ninety years since the BBC made its first broadcast and the British love affair with radio began.This book is a journey through that fascinating history and a celebration of the many wonderful voices that were part of it: Marion Cran, who pioneered the first gardening programme in the 1920s; The Goons and Kenneth Horne, comedy greats of the 1950s; John Peel, Alan Freeman, Kenny Everett and other heroes of the pirate stations; all the way up to Eddie Mair, Fi Glover and Danny Baker, the much-loved voices of today. A delightful blend of insight, history and nostalgia, Hello Again will appeal to any radio aficionado.
Hello, Darlings!: The Authorized Biography of Kenny Everett
by James Hogg Robert SellersSpontaneous, hilarious, irrepressible and, of course, trailblazing - Kenny Everett was revolutionary in television and radio comedy. Chris Evans, Chris Moyles, Rob Brydon and Steve Wright have all cited Kenny as a huge influence on their work - even the great Spike Milligan called him a genius. It was Kenny who developed the radio show format with which we are so familiar today: a mix of music, jingles, funny voices and sound effects. When he seamlessly made the move to television in the seventies, he created unforgettable characters such as Sid Snot, Cupid Stunt and Marcel Wave.Rarely seen without a smile on his face in public, in reality, Kenny was a deeply insecure man who suffered severe bouts of depression. He also struggled with his sexuality, only coming out to the public in 1985. Diagnosed with HIV in 1987, Kenny died in 1995.This in-depth and affectionate biography has been fully authorised by Kenny's family and contains original interviews with Kenny's sister, Kate and with his former wife, Lee, as well as entertainment figures such as Barry Cryer, Cliff Richard, Chris Tarrant and Paul Gambaccini. Packed with fabulous stories about the highs and lows of Kenny's life, his great friendships with The Beatles and Freddie Mercury, this is a book that any fan of comedy and entertainment must read.
Help
by Simon Amstell'A beautiful and clever book about being human' Russell BrandCOMEDY. TRAGEDY. THERAPY. Simon Amstell did his first stand-up gig at the age of thirteen. His parents had just divorced and puberty was confusing. Trying to be funny solved everything. HELP is the hilarious and heartbreaking account of Simon’s ongoing compulsion to reveal his entire self on stage. To tell the truth so it can’t hurt him any more. Loneliness, anxiety, depression – this book has it all. And more. From a complicated childhood in Essex to an Ayahuasca-led epiphany in the Amazon rainforest, this story will make you laugh, cry and then feel happier than you’ve ever been.
How Not to Grow Up: A Coming of Age Memoir. Sort of.
by Richard HerringComedian Richard Herring has a major problem. He's about to turn 40 and hasn't seen it coming. He's not married, doesn't have a proper job or 2.4 children. But now, finally, it looks as if the world expects him to be a grown up - and he's completely unprepared for it.As the momentous and terrifying event approaches (his birthday), Richard notices a steep decline in his own behaviour. Inexplicably he begins to behave more childishly - hanging out with 22-year-olds, developing an unhealthy addiction to Flumps and even getting into a ludicrous fight.How Not to Grow Up is the funny story of how a self-confessed perpetual Big Kid deals with his greatest fear - getting older - and is the perfect book for everyone who, deep down, still thinks that they're 18.
How to Be an Ex-Footballer
by Peter CrouchShortlisted for the Sports Entertainment Book of the Year at the British Sports Book AwardsThe funniest man in British sport - MetroPeter Crouch is a comedy genius - Daily MailOften recruited before they've worn long trousers, today's footballers become superstars who earn huge amounts without ever learning much about the world beyond the training ground. Coddled by their support teams, everything is done for them. They live their lives in the glaring media spotlight, yet only really develop one life skill - how to kick a ball better. Then inevitably, when age catches up with them or injury strikes, these man-children are thrown out into the real world, utterly defenceless apart from their multi-million-pound bank accounts.So what do these Peter Pans, whose careers end just as most people's are getting going, do with the rest of their lives? Crouch speaks from his own experience and discusses with fellow former professionals too - just how do you safely release a near seven-foot striker back into the wild?Peter goes in search of the answer to what his second career might be and encounters stories far more bizarre than anything you'll find on the pitch. From the pleasure and pain of management to the lessons we can learn from Jamie Carragher and Joe Cole on not going to seed. From those staying in the sport - the diehard veterans, coaches, managers, owners and of course the legion of pundits, to those moving on to pastures new. Peter talks to entrepreneurs, men of the cloth, eco warriors, artists, private detectives and budding actors, as well as those who've lost their way in addiction, crime and NFTs.When the final whistle blows, it's still all to play for.
How to Be Narstie
by Big NarstieMans here to help you help yourself.Real talk. One thing you've got to know about advice: there are two types. Sometimes the people who give the most advice to others are the last people you should be listening to. They just love the sound of their own voice. No matter what the problem is, they'll just say: 'Believe in yourself, you can do anything.' And then ... well, then there's the kind of advice that's just the truth. That's the sort of advice you might get from this book, and I'll warn you sometimes the truth ain't pretty. In these pages I'm gonna tell you some of my story and show you how you can change yours: how to survive school, how to get a job, how to deal with family, friends, love and PAIN. How to live your own life, not someone else's.