- Table View
- List View
Only Human
by Tom HoltSomething is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things? A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition-not to mention the lemming condition-is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.
Only Human
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'...both intimate and ambitious - not only human, but also divine' - DAILY TELEGRAPHSomething is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things?A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition - not to mention the lemming condition - is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.A dazzling comic fantasy novel from one of Britain's sharpest, funniest writers.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Only Human
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'...both intimate and ambitious - not only human, but also divine' - DAILY TELEGRAPHSomething is about to go wrong. Very wrong. What do you expect if the Supreme Being decides to get away from it all for a few days, leaving his naturally inquisitive son to look after the cosmic balance of things?A minor hiccup with a human soul and a welding machine soon leads to a violent belch, and before you know it the human condition - not to mention the lemming condition - is tumbling down the slippery slope to chaos.A dazzling comic fantasy novel from one of Britain's sharpest, funniest writers.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Open Sesame
by Tom HoltThere was something wrong! Just as the boiling water was about to be poured on his head and the man with the red book appeared and his life flashed before his eyes, Akram the Terrible, the most feared thief in Baghdad, knew this had happened before. Many times. And he was damned if he was going to let it happen again. Just because he was a character in a story didn't mean that it always had to end this way. Meanwhile, back in Southampton, it's a bit of a shock for Michelle when she puts on her Aunt Fatima's ring and the computer and the telephone start to bitch at her for past misdemeanors. But that's nothing compared to the story that her kitchen appliances have to tell her.
Open Sesame
by Tom Holt'Tom Holt stands out on his own... If you haven't read any Tom Holt, go out and buy one now. But don't blame me for any laughter-induced injuries.' - VECTOR'Witty and eccentric... dazzling, neat, frivolous.' - TIME OUTThere was something wrong! Just as the boiling water was about to be poured on his head and the man with the red book appeared and his life flashed before his eyes, Akram the Terrible, the most feared thief in Baghdad, knew this had happened before. Many times. And he was damned if he was going to let it happen again. Just because he was a character in a story didn't mean that it always had to end this way. Meanwhile, back in Southampton, it's a bit of a shock for Michelle when she puts on her Aunt Fatima's ring and the computer and the telephone start to bitch at her for past misdemeanors. But that's nothing compared to the story that her kitchen appliances have to tell her.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Open Sesame
by Tom Holt'Tom Holt stands out on his own... If you haven't read any Tom Holt, go out and buy one now. But don't blame me for any laughter-induced injuries.' - VECTOR'Witty and eccentric... dazzling, neat, frivolous.' - TIME OUTThere was something wrong! Just as the boiling water was about to be poured on his head and the man with the red book appeared and his life flashed before his eyes, Akram the Terrible, the most feared thief in Baghdad, knew this had happened before. Many times. And he was damned if he was going to let it happen again. Just because he was a character in a story didn't mean that it always had to end this way. Meanwhile, back in Southampton, it's a bit of a shock for Michelle when she puts on her Aunt Fatima's ring and the computer and the telephone start to bitch at her for past misdemeanors. But that's nothing compared to the story that her kitchen appliances have to tell her.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
An Orc on the Wild Side
by Tom HoltAn Orc on the Wild Side is the latest comic masterpiece from one of the funniest writers in fantasy.Winter is coming, so why not get away from it all?Being the Dark Lord and Prince of Evil is not as much fun as it sounds, particularly if you are a basically decent person. King Mordak is just such a person. Technically he's more goblin than person, but the point is that he is really keen to be a lot less despicable than his predecessors. Not that the other goblins appreciate Mordak's attempts to redefine the role. Why should they when his new healthcare program seems designed to actually extend life expectancy, and his efforts to end a perfectly reasonable war with the dwarves appear to have become an obsession? With confidence in his leadership crumbling, what Mordak desperately needs is a distraction. Perhaps some of these humans moving to the Realm in search of great homes at an affordable price will be able to help? For more from Tom Holt, check out:The Management Style of the Supreme BeingsThe Good, The Bad, and the SmugThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeWhen It's a JarDoughnutLife, Liberty, and the Pursuit of SausagesBlonde Bombshell
An Orc on the Wild Side
by Tom Holt'Uniquely twisted . . . cracking gags' - Guardian'Holt doesn't skimp on the flashes of brilliance' - SFX'Clever, funny, tirelessly inventive' - Christopher MooreWINTER IS COMING, SO WHY NOT GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?Being the Dark Lord and Prince of Evil is not as much fun as it sounds, particularly if you are a basically decent person. King Mordak is just such a person. Technically he's more goblin than person, but the point is that he is really keen to be a lot less despicable than his predecessors. Not that the other goblins appreciate Mordak's attempts to redefine the role. Why should they when his new healthcare program seems designed to actually extend life expectancy, and his efforts to end a perfectly reasonable war with the dwarves appear to have become an obsession? With confidence in his leadership crumbling, what Mordak desperately needs is a distraction. Perhaps some of these humans moving to the Realm in search of great homes at an affordable price will be able to help? An Orc on the Wild Side is the latest comic masterpiece from one of the funniest writers in fantasy.Books by Tom Holt: J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Other recent novelsBlonde BombshellLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
The Outsorcerer's Apprentice
by Tom HoltA happy workforce, it is said, is a productive workforce. Mmmm.Try telling that to an army of belligerent goblins. Or the Big Bad Wolf. Or a professional dragons layer. Who is looking after their well-being? Who gives a damn about their intolerable working conditions, lack of adequate health insurance, and terrible coffee in the canteen?Thankfully, with access to an astonishingly diverse workforce and limitless natural resources, maximizing revenue and improving operating profit has never really been an issue for the one they call "the Wizard." Until now. Because now a perfectly good business model -- based on sound fiscal planning, entrepreneurial flair, and only one or two of the infinite parallel worlds that make up our universe -- is about to be disrupted by a young man not entirely aware of what's going on. There's also a slight risk that the fabric of reality will be torn to shreds. You really do have to be awfully careful with these things.
The Outsorcerer's Apprentice: YouSpace Book 3 (YouSpace)
by Tom Holt'Satisfying and entertaining.' - RT Book Reviews'Entertaining.... Holt has a zany humor that will appeal to fans of Terry Pratchett and Christopher Moore.' - Library JournalA HAPPY WORKFORCE, IT IS SAID, IS A PRODUCTIVE WORKFORCE.Try telling that to an army of belligerent goblins. Or the Big Bad Wolf. Or a professional dragon slayer. Who is looking after their well-being? Who gives a damn about their intolerable working conditions, lack of adequate health insurance, and terrible coffee in the canteen?Thankfully, with access to an astonishingly diverse workforce and limitless natural resources, maximizing revenue and improving operating profit has never really been an issue for the one they call 'the Wizard.' Until now.Because now a perfectly good business model-based on sound fiscal planning, entrepreneurial flair, and only one or two of the infinite parallel worlds that make up our universe-is about to be disrupted by a young man not entirely aware of what's going on.There's also a slight risk that the fabric of reality will be torn to shreds. You really do have to be awfully careful with these things.A story of overlords, underlings and inhuman resources, The Outsorcerer's Apprentice isthe hilarious new novel from comic fantasist Tom Holt.Books by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
The Outsorcerer's Apprentice: YouSpace Book 3 (YouSpace)
by Tom Holt'Satisfying and entertaining.' - RT Book Reviews'Entertaining.... Holt has a zany humor that will appeal to fans of Terry Pratchett and Christopher Moore.' - Library JournalA HAPPY WORKFORCE, IT IS SAID, IS A PRODUCTIVE WORKFORCE.Try telling that to an army of belligerent goblins. Or the Big Bad Wolf. Or a professional dragon slayer. Who is looking after their well-being? Who gives a damn about their intolerable working conditions, lack of adequate health insurance, and terrible coffee in the canteen?Thankfully, with access to an astonishingly diverse workforce and limitless natural resources, maximizing revenue and improving operating profit has never really been an issue for the one they call 'the Wizard.' Until now.Because now a perfectly good business model-based on sound fiscal planning, entrepreneurial flair, and only one or two of the infinite parallel worlds that make up our universe-is about to be disrupted by a young man not entirely aware of what's going on.There's also a slight risk that the fabric of reality will be torn to shreds. You really do have to be awfully careful with these things.A story of overlords, underlings and inhuman resources, The Outsorcerer's Apprentice isthe hilarious new novel from comic fantasist Tom Holt.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Overtime
by Tom HoltGuy is a Mosquito pilot in World War II. He is surprised when his dead co-pilot apparently starts speaking to him as they are flying over Northern France. And before you can say "Bomber Harris", Guy finds himself caught up in time and travel, a search for Richard the Lionheart and a damsel.
Overtime
by Tom Holt'Witty, ironic ... and achieves a deeply felt authenticity' - NEW YORK TIMESGuy is a Mosquito pilot in World War II. He is surprised when his dead co-pilot apparently starts speaking to him as they are flying over Northern France. And before you can say Bomber Harris, Guy finds himself caught up in time and travel, a search for Richard the Lionheart and a damsel.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry PratchettBooks by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Overtime
by Tom Holt'Witty, ironic ... and achieves a deeply felt authenticity' - NEW YORK TIMESGuy is a Mosquito pilot in World War II. He is surprised when his dead co-pilot apparently starts speaking to him as they are flying over Northern France. And before you can say Bomber Harris, Guy finds himself caught up in time and travel, a search for Richard the Lionheart and a damsel.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry PratchettBooks by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Paint Your Dragon
by Tom HoltSculptress Bianca Wilson is a living legend. St. George is also a legend, but not living. However, when Bianca's sculpture of the patron saint and his scaly chum gets a bit too lifelike, it opens up a new can of wyrms. The dragon knows that in the battle between Good and Evil, Evil got a raw deal and is looking to set the record straight. And George (who cheated) thinks the record's just fine as it is.
Paint Your Dragon
by Tom Holt'Another imaginative and seriously funny novel from a master of the humorous fantasy genre.' - BOOKS MAGAZINE'Only a writer like Holt could make this work quite so well, and he does with great skill. Lots of fun.' - MANCHESTER EVENING NEWSOne moment Bianca's sculpture of St George is lacking just the final touches, the next, it's lacking a dragon. This is only the first step in a fight between good and evil, involving some heavyweight gamblers, a time entrepreneur, a dragon, St George, and some hideous but endearing demons.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry PratchettBooks by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Paint Your Dragon
by Tom Holt'Another imaginative and seriously funny novel from a master of the humorous fantasy genre.' - BOOKS MAGAZINE'Only a writer like Holt could make this work quite so well, and he does with great skill. Lots of fun.' - MANCHESTER EVENING NEWSOne moment Bianca's sculpture of St George is lacking just the final touches, the next, it's lacking a dragon. This is only the first step in a fight between good and evil, involving some heavyweight gamblers, a time entrepreneur, a dragon, St George, and some hideous but endearing demons.From one of the best-loved comic writers in fantasy fiction comes another absurdly witty title - perfect for fans of Douglas Adams or Terry PratchettBooks by Tom Holt: Walled Orchard Series Goatsong The Walled Orchard J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Sausages YouSpace Series Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the Smug Novels Expecting Someone Taller Who's Afraid of Beowulf Flying Dutch Ye Gods! Overtime Here Comes the Sun Grailblazers Faust Among Equals Odds and Gods Djinn Rummy My Hero Paint your Dragon Open Sesame Wish you Were Here Alexander at World's End Only Human Snow White and the Seven Samurai Olympiad Valhalla Nothing But Blue Skies Falling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
The Portable Door
by Tom HoltStarting a new job is always stressful, but when Paul Carpenter arrives at the office of H.W. Wells he has no idea what trouble lies in store. Because he is about to discover that the apparently respectable establishment now paying his salary is in fact a front for a deeply sinister organization that has a mighty peculiar agenda. It seems that half the time his bosses are away with the fairies. But they're not, of course. They're away with the goblins.
The Portable Door: J.W. Wells & Co. Book 1
by Tom HoltSoon to be a major film starring Christoph Waltz and Guy Pearce.Starting a new job is always stressful (especially when you don't particularly want one), but when Paul Carpenter arrives at the office of J. W. Wells he has no idea what trouble lies in store. Because he is about to discover that the apparently respectable establishment now paying his salary is in fact a front for a deeply sinister organisation that has a mighty peculiar agenda. It seems that half the time his bosses are away with the fairies. But they're not, of course.They're away with the goblins.'A definite must for all fans of comic fantasy' - ENIGMA The J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesOther recent titles from Tom Holt Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the SmugThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
The Portable Door: J.W. Wells & Co. Book 1 (J.W. Wells & Co. #1)
by Tom HoltSoon to be a major film starring Christoph Waltz and Guy Pearce.Starting a new job is always stressful (especially when you don't particularly want one), but when Paul Carpenter arrives at the office of J. W. Wells he has no idea what trouble lies in store. Because he is about to discover that the apparently respectable establishment now paying his salary is in fact a front for a deeply sinister organisation that has a mighty peculiar agenda. It seems that half the time his bosses are away with the fairies. But they're not, of course.They're away with the goblins.'A definite must for all fans of comic fantasy' - ENIGMA The J.W. Wells & Co. Series The Portable Door In Your Dreams Earth, Air, Fire and Custard You Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It Helps The Better Mousetrap May Contain Traces of Magic Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesOther recent titles from Tom Holt Doughnut When It's A Jar The Outsorcerer's Apprentice The Good, the Bad and the SmugThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
The Portable Door: J.W. Wells & Co. Book 1: Soon to be a major film starring Sam Neill, Christoph Waltz and Miranda Otto (J.W. Wells & Co. #1)
by Tom Holt'...hugely inventive and highly amusing ...His sharply observed dialogue and the desire to think round corners and u-bends distinguish Holt's books. He has the ability to make the reader laugh out loud and should be treasured.' - COMPUTERCROWSNEST'A definite must for all fans of comic fantasy' - ENIGMAStarting a new job is always stressful (especially when you don't particularly want one), but when Paul Carpenter arrives at the office of J. W. Wells he has no idea what trouble lies in store. Because he is about to discover that the apparently respectable establishment now paying his salary is in fact a front for a deeply sinister organisation that has a mighty peculiar agenda. It seems that half the time his bosses are away with the fairies. But they're not, of course.They're away with the goblins.Mister Tom Holt, Master of the Comic Fantasy Novel, cordially invites you to join him in his world of madness by reading his next hilarious masterpiece.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Snow White And The Seven Samurai
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'Frantically wacky and wilfully confusing ... gratifyingly clever and very amusing' - MAIL ON SUNDAYOnce upon a time (or last Thursday, as it's known in this matrix) everything was fine: Humpty Dumpty sat on his wall, Jack and Jill went about their lawful business, the Big Bad Wolf did what big bad wolves do, and the wicked queen plotted murder most foul.But the humans hacked, cried havoc, shut down the wicked queen's system (mirrors 3.1) and corrupted her database - and suddenly everything was not fine at all. But at least we know that they'll all live happily ever after. Don't we?Computers and fairy tales collide to hilarious effect in the latest sparkling cocktail of mayhem, wit and wonder from the master of comic fantasy.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Snow White And The Seven Samurai
by Tom Holt'When Tom Holt's on form, the world seems a much cheerier place' - SFX'Frantically wacky and wilfully confusing ... gratifyingly clever and very amusing' - MAIL ON SUNDAYOnce upon a time (or last Thursday, as it's known in this matrix) everything was fine: Humpty Dumpty sat on his wall, Jack and Jill went about their lawful business, the Big Bad Wolf did what big bad wolves do, and the wicked queen plotted murder most foul.But the humans hacked, cried havoc, shut down the wicked queen's system (mirrors 3.1) and corrupted her database - and suddenly everything was not fine at all. But at least we know that they'll all live happily ever after. Don't we?Computers and fairy tales collide to hilarious effect in the latest sparkling cocktail of mayhem, wit and wonder from the master of comic fantasy.Books by Tom Holt:Walled Orchard SeriesGoatsongThe Walled OrchardJ.W. Wells & Co. SeriesThe Portable DoorIn Your DreamsEarth, Air, Fire and CustardYou Don't Have to Be Evil to Work Here, But It HelpsThe Better MousetrapMay Contain Traces of MagicLife, Liberty and the Pursuit of SausagesYouSpace SeriesDoughnutWhen It's A JarThe Outsorcerer's ApprenticeThe Good, the Bad and the SmugNovelsExpecting Someone TallerWho's Afraid of BeowulfFlying DutchYe Gods!OvertimeHere Comes the SunGrailblazersFaust Among EqualsOdds and GodsDjinn RummyMy HeroPaint your DragonOpen SesameWish you Were HereAlexander at World's EndOnly HumanSnow White and the Seven SamuraiOlympiadValhallaNothing But Blue SkiesFalling SidewaysLittle PeopleSong for NeroMeadowlandBarkingBlonde BombshellThe Management Style of the Supreme BeingsAn Orc on the Wild Side
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
by Tom HoltOnce upon a time, everything was fine. Humpty Dumpty sat on his wall, Jack and Jill went about their lawful business, the Big Bad Wolf did what big bad wolves do, and the wicked queen plotted murder most foul. But the humans hacked, cried havoc, shut down the wicked queen's system, and corrupted her database-and suddenly everything was not fine at all. But at least we know that they'll all live happily ever after. Don't we?
A Song for Nero
by Tom HoltA Song for Nero is a 570 page independent "what if" novel first published in 2003 and written by the well-recognized witty and humorous fantasy author Tom Holt. The concept of the novel is interesting. After describing the circumstances of Nero's death, Abacus's summary states, "History, however, does not always tell the truth, and there is another possibility ... Nero did not die in that ditch, but somebody who looked very much like him did. This means that Nero has the opportunity to start a new life in pursuit of his first love: music. But there's a problem: he is being pursued by two people who have reason to suspect he is still alive and at least one of them wants him dead. A SONG FOR NERO is a remarkable historical novel, written with style, wit and authenticity. Whether or not it is a true story, however, remains a matter of speculation. What gives the novel its greatest color is the engaging, irreverent narrator, the scam artist who accompanies Nero on his picaresque travels. Full of schemes for cheating the picturesque inhabitants of the ancient Mediterranean world out of their gold and silver coins, he has, as Seneca, "the wisest man in the world," observes, an Epicurean's devotion to his own pleasure and personal advantage that he defends with the determinism of the Stoics in a racy, profane, colloquial style that has a very anachronistic modern flavor.