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Gut-Busting Puns for Minecrafters: Endermen, Explosions, Withers, and More (Jokes for Minecrafters)
by Brian Boone Amanda BrackIt can’t get punnier than this!
Gutshot Straight: A Novel
by Lou Berney“Lou Berney’s novel is so energetic, so droll, and so wheezingly funny that it accomplished what no book ever has before: it made me forget to eat lunch.”—Stephen Harrigan, New York Times bestselling author of Challenger ParkA fast and funny caper in the tradition of Elmore Leonard, Carl Hiaasen, and the Coen Brothers, Gutshot Straight brings a fresh new talent into the crime fiction fold: Louis Berney. He’s already won raves for his short fiction collection The Road to Bobby Joe and Other Stories (“Rivals the work of contemporary hotshots T.C. Boyle and Ralph Lombreglia” —Chicago Tribune). With Gutshot Straight, Berney is “all in”—sure to win a fervent following with the story of “Shake” Bouchon, fresh out of prison and on the straight and narrow path…after maybe just one last job.
Guy Diamond and the Rainbow Roundup (DreamWorks Trolls)
by David Lewman Random HouseThe next installment in the early chapter-book series starring the characters from DreamWorks Trolls--plus a collectible bookmark!When all the rainbows in Troll Village disappear, it's up to Guy Diamond to get them back before the annual Rainbow Rave party! Join Guy, Poppy, Branch, and the rest of the lovable DreamWorks Trolls in the fourth installment of this original chapter-book series. This book is perfect for children ages 6 to 9--and it comes with a collectible bookmark!DreamWorks Trolls are the most magical creatures with the wildest hair--and you can bring Poppy, Branch, Lady Glittersparkles, and the other Trolls to life in your own magical adventures!
Guy Noir and the straight skinny
by Garrison KeillorFamous radio private eye Guy Noir leaps from A Prairie Home Companion to the page On the 12th floor of the Acme Building, on a cold February day in St. Paul, Guy Noir looks down the barrel of a loaded revolver in the hands of geezer gangster Joey Roast Beef who is demanding to hear what lucrative scheme Guy is cooking up with stripper-turned-women's-studies-professor Naomi Fallopian. Everyone wants to know-Joey, Lieutenant McCafferty, reporter Gene Williker, Guy’s ex-girlfriend Sugar O'Toole, the despicable Larry B. Larry, the dreamboat Scarlett Anderson, Mr. Kress of the FDA–and Guy faces them one by one, as he and Naomi pursue a dream of earning gazillions by selling a surefire method of dramatic weight loss. In this whirlwind caper Guy faces danger, falls in love, and faces off with the capo del capo del grande primo capo Johnny Banana. .
Guy Walks Into A Bar...: 501 Bar Jokes, Stories, Anecdotes, Quips, Quotes, Riddles, and Wisecracks
by Michael LewisDid you hear the one about the bartender and the rabbi? If not, you?ll find it in this delightful book?along with hundreds of other jokes and funny stories, classic and brand-new?about the denizens of bars, pubs, and watering holes everywhere. Michael Lewis has gathered a wide range of the very best and funniest bar jokes, riddles, anecdotes, and quotations in this rib-tickling (and thirst-inducing) collection. Sure to be a favorite of tipplers of all stripes?and the teetotalers who drive them home?the book also includes bar bets, games, tricks, trivia, and more. Featuring classic "bartoons" opening each chapter, its nifty 5 x 7 trim size makes it a perfect party takealong or barside companion?right next to the cocktail shaker, the jar of olives?and Black Dog?s mega-bestselling New New York Bartender?s Guide.
Guyku: A Year of Haiku for Boys
by Bob Raczka Peter H. ReynoldsBoy-centric haiku about outdoor fun throughout the seasons, with illustrations by the New York Times bestselling creator Peter Reynolds.The wind and I play tug-of-war with my new kite. The wind is winning. When you’re a guy, nature is one big playground—no matter what the season. There are puddles to splash through in the spring, pine trees to climb in the summer, maple seeds to catch in the fall, and icicles to sword fight with in the winter. Nature also has a way of making a guy appreciate important stuff—like how many rocks it takes to dam up a stream, or how much snow equals a day off from school. So what kind of poetry best captures these special moments, at a length that lets guys get right back to tree climbing and kite flying? Why, guyku, of course!
Guys Can Be Cat Ladies Too: A Guidebook for Men and Their Cats
by Michael Showalter“Mixes the funny with the feline . . . Showalter makes us laugh while revealing that he’s a big softie who cares a lot about the future of felines.” —CatsterMichael Showalter’s Guys Can Be Cat Ladies Too is the hilarious all-access guide to help a man comprehend, appreciate, and bond with the felines in his life. They say dogs are a man’s best friend. True! But what if that man’s girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, or mother-in-law has a cat? Is that the end for him? Is he resigned to an eternity of estrangement from this furry creature with which he shares his life partner, his favorite chair, and his sock drawer? Showalter offers hope for men everywhere in their quest to understand and love cats. In this intimate portrait of one man’s love for cats, you will learn the answers to burning questions such as: Why are they all aloof and weird and stuff?; They hate me, right?; and Is it true that they have nine lives? Armed with these and countless other valuable lessons, by the book’s end any guy can be on the fast track to becoming a cat’s best friend.“Showalter enlightens the male species on how to become loving cat people . . . it’s an inside scoop on how men can learn to love the felines that come into their lives by no choice of their own.” —Trend Hunter“Fabulously illustrated.” —Entertainment Weekly
Guys Read: A Day in the Life
by Shaun TanAn artist takes us through his day, from his own particular perspective A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: A Short Story
by Anthony HorowitzTim Diamond—the world’s worst private detective—takes on his most dangerous case yet, and it’s going to be up to his brother to keep him out of trouble. A short story from Guys Read: Thriller, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: A Short Story
by Gennifer CholdenkoRiver and Niko find their dad is missing, and they have no choice but to track him down. But when they discover the clues lead to a shady reptile dealer, they start to think they might have gotten in over their heads. A short story from Guys Read: Thriller, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: Against All Odds
by Dustin BrownDustin Brown, all-star captain of the 2012 Stanley Cup Champion Los Angeles Kings, tells his story of how he went from being a youth hockey player in Ithaca, New York, to becoming one of the NHL's biggest stars. This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: Bouncing the Grinning Goat
by Shannon HaleGuys Read: Bouncing the Grinning Goat: A Short Story from Guys Read: Other Worlds
Guys Read: Choke
by Joseph BruchacIt takes a big risk in the mixed martial arts arena for 98-pound weakling Johnny to find that real power comes from within. This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: Find Your Fire
by Tim GreenOffensive lineman Jake and his best friend, Bobby, were planning on playing for the Immaculate Heart football team together—until an unexpected turn of events finds them competing for one scholarship. This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: Frost and Fire
by Ray BradburyBorn into a world with only seven days to live, Sim faces the same choice everyone does: how will he spend them? Is there something greater to hope for? A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: Funny Business
by Jon ScieszkaIt's here: Volume One of the official Guys Read Library. Jon Scieszka's Guys Read initiative was founded on a simple premise: that young guys enjoy reading most when they have reading they can enjoy. And out of this comes a series that aims to give them just that. Ten books, arranged by theme, featuring the best of the best where writing for kids is concerned. Each book is a collection of original short stories, but these aren't your typical anthologies-each book is edgy, inventive, visual, and one-of-a-kind, featuring a different theme for guys to get excited about. Funny Business is based around the theme of-what else?-humor, and if you're familiar with Jon and Guys Read, you already know what you're in store for: ten hilarious stories from some of the funniest writers around. Before you're through, you'll meet a teenage mummy; a kid desperate to take a dip in the world's largest pool of chocolate milk; a homicidal turkey; parents who hand over their son's room to a biker; the only kid in his middle school who hasn't turned into a vampire, wizard, or superhero; and more. And the contributor list includes bestselling author, award winners, and fresh new talent alike: Mac Barnett, Eoin Colfer, Christopher Paul Curtis, Kate DiCamillo (writing with Jon Scieszka), Paul Feig, Jack Gantos, Jeff Kinney, David Lubar, Adam Rex, and David Yoo. Guys Read is all about turning young readers into lifelong ones-and with this book, and each subsequent installment in the series, we aim to leave no guy unturned.
Guys Read: Heroes & Villains
by Laurie Halse Anderson Jack Gantos Jon Scieszka Sharon Creech Deborah Hopkinson Ingrid Law Eugene Yelchin Christopher Healy Pam Munoz Ryan Cathy CamperHeroes and Villains, the seventh volume in Jon Scieszka’s Guys Read Library of Great Reading, is chock-full of adventure featuring an array of characters—with and without capes.Featuring ten all-new, original stories that run the gamut from fantasy to comics to contemporary adventure to nonfiction, and featuring eleven of the most acclaimed, exciting writers for kids working today, this collection is the perfect book for you, whether you use your powers for good—or evil.Authors include Laurie Halse Anderson, Cathy Camper and Raúl Gonzalez, Sharon Creech, Jack Gantos, Christopher Healy, Deborah Hopkinson, Ingrid Law, Pam Muñoz Ryan, Lemony Snicket, and Eugene Yelchin, with illustrations by Jeff Stokely.
Guys Read: How I Won the World Series
by Dan GutmanChildren's author and lifelong baseball fan Dan Gutman recounts how he himself was actually the hero in the New York Mets' miraculous defeat of the Boston Red Sox in Game Six of the 1986 World Series—the infamous Bill Buckner game. This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: I Will Destroy You, Derek Jeter
by Chris RylanderWes' life has been nothing but one tragedy after another since he went to see a game at Yankee Stadium, and it can all be traced back to one man: all-star shortstop Derek Jeter. Now, Derek Jeter must pay. This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: Kid Appeal (Guys Read Ser.)
by Jon Scieszka David LubarThe whole school is getting in on the action when a contest is announced: The student who creates the best project on New Cairo’s history will win a trip to the cool new water park in town. Charlie has a plan that can’t lose—as long as he doesn’t lose his life in the process. A short story from the acclaimed collection Guys Read: Funny Business, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: Max Swings For the Fences
by Anne UrsuMaximilian Funk is the new kid in school, and not much of a baseball fan, a deadly combination. He has to figure out a way to impress Molly Kinsman, the best pitcher in the city and the most beautiful girl he's ever seen. One little lie couldn't hurt, could it? This short story from the collection Guys Read: The Sports Pages is a winner.
Guys Read: Other Worlds
by Jon ScieszkaOther Worlds, the fourth volume in Jon Scieszkas Guys Read anthology series for tween boys, features ten thrilling new tales of science fiction and fantasy from some of the biggest names in childrens literature. Prepare yourself for ten trips into the unknown, as ten of your favorite writers--Rick Riordan, who has written an all-new and exclusive Percy Jackson tale, Tom Angleberger of Origami Yoda fame, Newbery medalist Rebecca Stead, Shannon Hale, D. J. MacHale, Eric Nylund, Kenneth Oppel, Neal Shusterman, Shaun Tan, and none other than the late Ray Bradbury--spin tales of fantasy and science fiction the likes of which you have never imagined. Compiled by National Ambassador for Childrens Literature (and Secret Ambassador for the Intergalactic Alliance) Jon Scieszka, Guys Read: Other Worlds is sure to boldly take you where no reader has gone before.
Guys Read: Plan B
by Rebecca SteadNathan has been locked in his room ever since “it” started growing back. They’re going to come for him soon, so he’s got precious little time to tell us what is happening. A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: Rise of the RoboShoesTM
by Tom AnglebergerFirst they were given AutoLaces, then NanoGyroWheels, then FissionSoles and TurboBrains…and then they took over the world. But can they keep it? A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Guys Read: Terrifying Tales (Guys Read #6)
by R. L. Stine Dav Pilkey Jon Scieszka Adele Griffin Michael Buckley Rita Williams-Garcia Lisa Brown Kelly Barnhill Gris Grimly Adam Gidwitz Claire Legrand Nikki Loftin Daniel Jose OlderBe afraid, be very afraid of Terrifying Tales, the sixth volume in the Guys Read Library of Great Reading. Eleven masters of suspense--Kelly Barnhill, Michael Buckley, Adam Gidwitz, Adele Griffin and Lisa Brown, Claire Legrand, Nikki Loftin, Daniel José Older, Dav Pilkey, R.L. Stine, and Rita Williams-Garcia--have come together to bring you a bone-chilling collection of original ghost stories with illustrations by Gris Grimly, perfect for sharing around the campfire, reading under the covers with a flashlight, and scaring your friends' pants off. Compiled and edited by kid-lit madman Jon Scieszka, Guys Read: Terrifying Tales is a creepy-fun read (if you're brave enough, that is).