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Googol Boy: And the peculiar incident of the Great Quiz Trophy (Googol Boy)
by John MichaelWhen an unassuming, rather clueless teenager is zapped by lightning while working on his computer, he absorbs all the information off the internet and his (very) ordinary brain starts to exhibit extraordinary potential. As Howie struggles to control his new-found power he is faced with all sorts of hilarious predicaments, from contending with mega-mean teachers to being ridiculed by the school braniac, a petite know-it-all determined to humiliate him. Can Howie overcome the enormous obstacles before him to defeat his annoying arch-nemesis and solve the peculiar mystery of the stolen Great Quiz Trophy?
The Goomba Diet: Living Large and Loving It
by Steven R. SchirripaHey, goomba! Are you on the Goomba Diet? Do you need to be?• Do they put up crime scene tape after you visit the buffet table?• Is the air freshener in your car a slice of provolone?Stop crying! The Goomba Diet is here—the dolce vita diet that shows you how to eat more, drink more, laugh more, live more, and feel great while you’re doing it. The Goomba Diet offers sensible weight-loss tips for the guy who’s gone too far:• Touch your toes. If this is difficult, pay a guy to do it for you.• Walk to court.It also offers helpful maintenance tips for the goomba who’s the perfect weight and wants to stay that way:• Try an appetite suppressant. Try eating at Applebee’s. • Pick up something heavy. Get a copy of The Da Vinci Code. • Cut out those carbs. Only eat pastas that end in the letter i. The Goomba Diet is the personal lifestyle guide from Steven R. Schirripa—Bobby “Bacala” Baccalieri from HBO’s hit series The Sopranos and author of the bestseller A Goomba’s Guide to Life. Developed over decades of dreaming about and then living the high life, it’s a how-to guide for happy living—how to duke a maître d', how to order a good meal, how to be a good father, a good husband and a good friend, and how to behave at a wedding, a funeral, and on the job. You wanna have a good time? Follow these rules:• Do tip the maid. Don’t tip the made guy. • Do tip the D.J. Don’t tip the D.A.• Do tell the bride she’s beautiful. Don’t tell her she’s hardly showing.• Do give your kids an allowance. Don’t offer to “make it interesting” by shooting craps for double or nothing.The Goomba Diet is for everyone with an appetite for life, and for everyone who understands that the key to happiness isn’t found in a smaller waistline but in a bigger heart. Like Steve says, “There’s a lot of skinny actors wearing black turtlenecks and tending bar right now who’d kill for a part on The Sopranos. This fat goomba is doing all right for himself.”So relax! Stop worrying about how much you’re eating, and start worrying about how much you’re enjoying it. Lose weight if you like—but live! Put a fork in your right hand, a hunk of bread in your left, and mangia like you mean it. HBO® and The Sopranos® are service marks of Time Warner Entertainment Company, L.P.From the Hardcover edition.
The Goomba's Book of Love
by Steven R. Schirripa Charles FlemingMove over Miss Lonelyhearts . . . Steven R. Schirripa, author of the runaway bestseller A Goomba's Guide to Life, is back with more life lessons from the neighborhood. Recalling stories of his own colorful journey from the streets of Bensonhurst to the bright lights of Las Vegas and stardom as Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri in the HBO hit series The Sopranos, Schirripa observes the finer points of amore in all its forms--love for his mother and her Sunday sauce, his wife and kids, his friends, his goomar on the side, even for his car (and he better not catch you eating in it, if you know what's good for you). Alternately touching, telling, and laugh-out-loud funny, The Goomba's Book of Love proves that no one loves as fiercely (or as frequently) as a goomba.
A Goomba's Guide to Life
by Steven R. Schirripa Charles FlemingAttention would-be paesans: Can't distinguish "gabagool" from "pasta fazool"? Not sure how to properly accessorize your track suit with gold chains? Does the phrase "go to the mattresses" make you sleepy? Now Steven R. Schirripa, The Sopranos' own Bobby Bacala, exposes the inner mysteries of this unique Italian-American hybrid in A Goomba's Guide to Life so that anyone can walk, talk, and live like a guy "from the neighborhood." Über-goomba Steve Schirripa shows how being a goomba made him what he is today, offering lessons learned on his own journey from Bensonhurst to Vegas, and to his current gig as Bobby Bacala on one of TV's most popular shows. Along the way, he shares secrets that will help you get in touch with your own inner goomba. You'll learn what music to enjoy (Sinatra, yes; Snoop Dogg, no), what movies to watch (Raging Bull, yes; Titanic, never), which sports to follow (baseball is good; golf and tennis, fuhgeddaboudit), and even tips on goomba etiquette. Ever wonder how a real goomba gets the best seat in the house? (Hint: It involves tipping, jewelry, and intimidation. ) Schirripa even includes goomba do's and don'ts (never, ever criticize a goomba's mother or her gravy; always wear more jewelry than you think you need). With knockout photographs of Schirripa and his compares, and insider information on how to think goomba, speak goomba, cook and eat goomba, and even how to behave at goomba weddings and funerals, A Goomba's Guide to Life will show any wiseguy wannabe how to sing like a Soprano.
Gooney Bird and All Her Charms
by Lois Lowry Middy Thomas"It's March!" Mrs. Pidgeon said as she wrote the day's date on the chalkboard. "In like a lion, out like a lamb!" The morning bell has rung at Watertower Elementary School, and it's time for Mrs. Pidgeon's class to turn to page 52 in their science books to learn about one of the most spectacular scientific subjects of all--the human body! As usual, Gooney Bird has a special plan to make learning more fun. But what on earth is in that scary-looking box that her uncle, Dr. Oglethorpe, has brought to the second grade? And what does it have to do with the charms on Gooney's jingling silver bracelet? It looks as if another special story is in the works!
Gooney Bird Greene
by Lois Lowry Middy ThomasFrom the moment Gooney Bird Greene arrives at Watertower Elementary School, her fellow second-graders are intrigued by her unique sense of style and her unusual lunches. So when story time arrives, the choice is unanimous: they want to hear about Gooney Bird Greene. And that suits her just fine, because, as it turns out, Gooney Bird has quite a few interesting and "absolutely true" stories to tell.Through Gooney Bird and her tales, acclaimed author Lois Lowry introduces young readers to the concepts and elements of storytelling. By demonstrating some of the simple techniques that reveal the extraordinary in everyday events, this book will encourage the storyteller in everyone.
Gooney Bird Is So Absurd
by Lois LowryThe fourth hilarious title in Lowis Lowry's popular Gooney Birdseries! It’s a cold January at the Watertower Elementary School--the perfect weather for Gooney Bird Greene to break out her special brain-warming hat! It's a good thing she has one. Gooney Bird's brain will need to be as warm as possible this month, because Mrs. Pidgeon is teaching her class about poetry. Who knew there could be so many different ways to write a poem? Haikus, couplets, limericks-Mrs. Pidgeon’s students soon find that writing good poetry takes a lot of hard work and creative thinking. Gooney Bird and her classmates are up to the challenge. But just when things are going well, the kids get some terrible news. Gooney Bird will need all the inspiration her brain can muster to organize the most important poem the class has ever written.
Gooney Bird on the Map (Gooney Bird Greene #5)
by Lois Lowry Middy ThomasGooney Bird Greene returns for more adventures in this chapter-book series from two-time Newbery Medal-winner Lois Lowry. Mrs. Pidgeon's second grade class has a lot to celebrate in February: presidents' birthdays, Valentine's Day, and school vacation. Of course, the students are talking about their awesome vacation plans every chance they get. It can be hard to focus on subtraction problems when you're heading to Hawaii or Florida in seventeen minus seven days!But most of the class (twelve minus three of them, in fact) will be staying home during vacation.Can Gooney Bird Greene keep spirits up while everyone is feeling down? Gooney Bird has a great idea that sends her classmates and her on a snowy spin through U.S. history and geography!
Gooney the Fabulous
by Lois LowryMrs. Pidgeon has been reading Aesop's fables to her second grade class. What's a fable? Well, it's a story that has animals as characters, and it teaches you something important, and . . . Once again it is Gooney Bird Greene who knows how to turn lessons into fun. She has an idea. A fabulous idea! What if each child creates his or her own fable, and tells it to the class? One by one Mrs. Pidgeon's students create costumes and stories and morals and excitement. Everyone except Nicholas. What on earth is making Nicholas so unhappy? Leave it to Gooney Bird, of course, to help him solve his problem . . . in a truly fabulous way.
The Goonies (Little Golden Book)
by Arie Kaplan"Hey, you guys!" The Goonies Little Golden Book is based on the classic film that features those adventure-seeking Goonies as lovable Funko POP! figures!Follow Mikey and the other Goonies as they race to find the pirate treasure that will help them save their beloved Goon Docks in this delightful retelling of the beloved classic movie The Goonies. Illustrated in the quirky and loveable Funko POP! art style, this collectable Little Golden Book will delight kids ages 2 to 5—and their parents—with its light-hearted reimagining of one of the funniest films of all time!
The Goose Egg
by Liz WongFrom the author of Jumpstart's Read for the Record pick Quackers comes the story of Henrietta the Elephant, whose life goes from calm to chaotic when a baby goose comes to stay.Henrietta likes her quiet life. A morning swim, a cup of tea--all is serene.But everything changes when she bumps her head and winds up with a goose egg--a REAL goose egg. Henrietta tries to return the baby goose to the nest, but her flock has flown. It's up to Henrietta to raise her. Goose isn't anything like Henrietta. She's flappy, and noisy, and exhausting. But Henrietta raises that goose right. She teaches her to swim, and to honk, and to fly. When Goose flies off with the other geese, Henrietta is so proud! And then . . . lonely. How quiet her life feels now.But the love you give has a way of coming back to you. And Henrietta has a wonderful surprise in store. . . .
Goose the Bear
by Katja GehrmannBear got more than he bargained for when he accidentally ran into Fox. Little did he know, Bear had picked up Fox's stolen goose egg. Soon, the egg hatches and Bear finds himself holding a confused little gosling that's calling him "Mama." <P><P>Try as he might to convince the little goose he's not its mother, the goose sticks around. Bear tries to show the goose that he's not its mother by climbing, running, and swimming away, but Goose is there every step of the way, climbing, running, and swimming just as well as Bear. But, Fox is lurking the whole time, waiting to take back his "prize." Just as Bear begins to accept Goose as his own, Fox makes his move. Will Fox get Goose, or will "Goose the Bear" make "Mama" proud?In this quirky mix-up at its finest, Katja Gehrmann tells the heartwarming and species-confused story of Goose the Bear with the help of colorful, offbeat illustrations and a narrative to match. If you want to be a bear, be a bear-even if you're a goose.
Goosebumps (Classic Goosebumps #1-4)
by R. L. StineNight of the Living Dummy: Discover the fan-favorite thriller and chiller that first introduced the world to the wooden face of fear. The puppet who pulls all the strings. None other than Slappy the Dummy! Deep Trouble: Find out why Billy Deep and his sister, Sheena, are afraid of dark lagoons, coral reefs, and anything that appears to be half-human, half-fish! Monster Blood: Evan visits an eerie old toy store and buys a dusty can of Monster Blood. But then he notices something weird about the slimy green ooze. It keeps growing. And growing. And growing. And all that growing has given the Monster Blood a monstrous appetite... The Haunted Mask: Carly Beth thinks she's found the best Halloween mask ever. With yellow-green skin and long animal fangs, the mask terrifies the entire neighborhood. Before long, it has a surprising effect on Carly Beth, too. She tries to take it off... but it won't budge! Halloween is almost over, but fright night is just beginning.
Goosebumps The Movie: The Movie Novel
by Scholastic R. L. StineTHE GOOSEBUMPS MOVIE captures the chills, thrills, and giggles of Scholastic's original bestselling series. Jack Black stars as author R. L. Stine. Zach, 16, has just moved from NYC to a creepy small town. He soon realizes his new neighbor, Hannah (also 16), is in danger. When he tries to rescue her, he accidentally unleashes the monsters created and brought to life by her writer father, R.L. Stine. Now it's up to Zach, Hannah, and Stine to get the monsters back in their books where they belong. Can they stop the monsters... for good?
Goosebumps Wanted: The Haunted Mask (Goosebumps)
by R. L. StineFor the first time ever, Goosebumps is in hard cover! Catch the series' most notorious characters--undead or alive... From horror master R.L. Stine come two new chilling stories in one spooky standalone: The Haunted Mask has returned and is determined to make this the worst night of your life! Where's the last place you would want to get stuck? A haunted pumpkin patch where the jack o'lanterns are after you! And watch for Goosebumps: Most Wanted, an all-new paperback series coming in the fall.
Gordon’s Game: Third in the hilarious rugby adventure series for 9-to-12-year-olds who love sport
by Paul Howard Gordon D'ArcyGordon is back again for his biggest challenge yet in the third book of the hilarious Gordon's Game series!__________Gordon D'Arcy has achieved a lot in his short life. He has won the Six Nations with Ireland and the European Cup with Leinster.Not bad for a boy who's still at school!Now, he has a brand-new opportunity - the chance to play for the famous British and Irish Lions as they tour South Africa. But before he can get on the plane, he must overcome the injury that threatens to end his career, and make the difficult choice between rugby and friendship.Gordon has to help Clive Woodward pull off a series win against South Africa and their fearsome forwards - the notorious Bomb Squad.And he certainly has to keep his wits about him when he finds himself in a wildlife reserve, surrounded by animals that want to eat him for dinner!Is another dream about to come true for Gordon D'Arcy? Or has this young Lion finally bitten off more than he can chew?
Gordon's Game: The hilarious rugby adventure book for children aged 9-12 who love sport
by Paul Howard Gordon D'ArcyA rugby-mad boy. A huge game. And a chance for an epic win . . . or an epic fail!Gordon D'Arcy is an ordinary boy, but he's not so ordinary once he gets a rugby ball in his hands. He's the star player for Wexford Wanderers and dreams of one day wearing the Ireland jersey. A dream like that means hard work, raw talent and never losing sight of your goals.But Gordon has a wild streak that often lands him in trouble. Mum and Dad think that if he can just channel his energy, all will be well. Then something utterly mad happens and he gets a chance to live his biggest dream. Can he stay on his game and do everyone proud? Or will trouble follow him . . . like it usually does? Gordon's Game is a funny and inspiring adventure for rugby lovers of all ages!'A cracking read . . . which will appeal to all the family' Irish Country Magazine
Gordon’s Game: Blue Thunder
by Paul Howard Gordon D'ArcyGordon is back for more mayhem and mischief in the second book in the laugh-out-loud Gordon's Game series!__________Gordon D'Arcy - the only kid at school with a Six Nations medal hidden under his pillow! Though helping Ireland to win the Grand Slam feels like it was just a dream.Now, he's been given a brand new challenge - the chance to play for Leinster.After learning so many lessons playing for Ireland - including how to make a complete eejit of himself in front of millions of people - fitting in at Leinster should be a breeze. Right?Unfortunately, not. After his first training session, he sees why the team is mocked for being 'soft' (those stories about players wearing fake tan? All true!). Now he knows why so many people from Leinster support Munster.But Gordon settles down to work under an inspiring coach named Joe Schmidt. Joe promises that, with hard work, discipline and a bit of self-belief, Leinster can win the European Cup.Maybe another dream can come true!
Gordos: Peripecias en el afán por adelgazar
by Mauro FulcoLas vicisitudes que afrontan quienes quieren rebelarse contra lagenética relatado en primera persona y con un humor inteligente ymordaz. Tengo casi treinta años, soy gordo y me dicen Pochoclo. Las publicidadesde hombres con abdominales marcados son una demostración de lo que nuncaseré. Ni las largas sesiones de gimnasio, ni las dietas másestrafalarias, ni siquiera una racha atroz de negativas a la hora de laconquista amorosa lograron tornear mi abdomen. Soy lo que las abuelasllaman «morrudo», pertenezco a ese espécimen que las madres dicen «tienehuesos grandes», los técnicos de fútbol denominan «pesados"» y lasnovias«gordito».Después de un eterno peregrinar por doctores y doctorcitos, licenciadose iluminados con dietas mágicas, chamanes y chantas, toqué fondo. Labalanza marcó más de tres cifras y numeró lo que mi cuerpo ya sabía y laropa indicaba a fuerza de apretujones. ¿Qué hice? Reírme, como se reiráusted con este libro. Porque decidí someterme a los tratamientos másridículos, participar de cuanto grupo existe para adelgazar, tolerar aabuelas que cuentan que pican de la papilla de sus nietos y se comenveinte barritas de cereal, internarme en un spa para bajar de peso abase de privaciones, y hablar con muchos panzones como yo, que tambiéndecidieron dejar de intentar ser lo que no son. El resultado es estahistoria que tiene entre manos. Si alguna vez se encontró en alguna delas situaciones por las que pasé, podría haber sido el autor de estaslíneas.Para escribir este libro, el autor probó dietas hipocalóricas, pasó portodas las asociaciones para bajar de peso, participó de grupos deautoayuda y hasta se internó para hacer un tratamiento deadelgazamiento.
Gorgeous
by Rachel VailShe's looking good . . . but Allison Avery can't believe it. Growing up with beautiful, blond sisters, Allison has always been the dark-haired, "interesting-looking" Avery. So when the devil shows up and offers to make her gorgeous, Allison jumps at the chance to finally get noticed. But there's one tiny catch, and it's not her soul: The devil wants her cell phone. Though her deal with the devil seems like a good idea at the time, Allison soon realizes that being gorgeous isn't as easy as it looks. Are her new friends and boyfriend for real, or do they just like her pretty face? Allison can't trust anyone anymore, and her possessed phone and her family's financial crisis aren't making things any easier. Plus, when she finds out that she might be America's next teen model, all hell breaks loose. Allison may be losing control, but how far is she willing to go to stay gorgeous forever? Following the critically acclaimed Lucky, Rachel Vail continues her poignant sisterhood trilogy with the rebellious middle Avery sister, Allison. Fiery, sarcastic, and just plain fun, gorgeous captures the heartbreak and hilarity in one girl's attempt to have it all.
Gorilla Beach
by Nicole Snooki" PolizziWhen you're this smokin', winning is a shore thing. . . . Jersey's sexiest guidettes are back for another scandalous summer at the Shore, and this time, Giovanna "Gia" Spumanti and Isabella "Bella" Rizzoli are raising the stakes to find thrills and hot gorillas--unemployment, douchebag exes, family drama, and dingy apartment be damned! But when the girls unknowingly cross an overprotective mafiosa mama, all bets are off. Booted from Seaside Heights for good, the spunky, sequined meatball and her sensitive, quiet cousin are forced to flee to Atlantic City. Their escort out of hell is Fredo, a weird and scrawny but hooked-up club manager from a prominent family, whose master plan is to pimp out Gia's psychic gifts at the roulette tables. Suddenly, it's raining benjamins for the coiffed and tanned threesome. Top-shelf tequila and seafood dinners are not all they're scoring. Bella snags a pale but talented boardwalk artist, Gia hooks up with a high-stakes poker hottie, and with Gia's coaching, Fredo just might have a chance at becoming a certified juicehead. Or, at least, a gorilla-in-training. But when the casino suspects cheating, the trio is hounded by haters and tricksters determined to sabotage their endless summer. With hearts and loot on the line, losing is not a chance the crew can take. This time, the house isn't going to win. . . .
Gorillas in Our Midst
by Terry Jones Richard FairgrayGorillas can be hard to spot, because they are masters of disguise and really good at hiding. Gorillas often have jobs where they get to wear masks--that’s why so many gorillas are surgeons, astronauts, scuba divers, and ninjas. There are adult gorillas and kid gorillas. There are even gorillas that go to school with you. You may think you’ve seen a gorilla swinging by before, but it’s much more likely that he was an orangutan--orangutans are terrible at hiding. You will know when there are lots of gorillas living in your midst because the grocery stores will be entirely out of bananas. In fact, you should always carry a banana with you, because you never know when there might be a gorilla around. Gorillas in Our Midst is all silliness and fun, and is destined to become a new favorite. Comic artist Richard Fairgray’s illustrations are filled with wonderful details for kids to discover with each read. Kids will love spotting the gorillas on each page and are sure to laugh out loud at the gorillas’ many disguises. And, of course, a story like this can’t end without a surprising twist!
Gork, the Teenage Dragon: A novel
by Gabe HudsonA TODAY Show Summer Pick An Amazon Summer Reading Pick A Barnes & Noble Best New Fiction of the Month PickA wacky, exuberant, heartfelt debut novel: the unholy child of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Harry Potter, and Sixteen Candles—and this time with dragons.“No good human won't love this dragon named Gork.” —Dave Eggers“A one-of-a-kind coming-of-age story.” —Tracy K. Smith, U.S. Poet Laureate Gork isn’t like the other dragons at WarWings Military Academy. He has a gigantic heart, two-inch horns, and an occasional problem with fainting. His nickname is Weak Sauce and his Will to Power ranking is Snacklicious—the lowest in his class. But he is determined not to let any of this hold him back as he embarks on the most important mission of his life: tonight, on the eve of his high school graduation, he must ask a female dragon to be his queen. If she says yes, they'll go off to conquer a foreign planet together. If she says no, Gork becomes a slave. Vying with Jocks, Nerds, Mutants, and Multi-Dimensioners to find his mate, Gork encounters an unforgettable cast of friends and foes, including Dr. Terrible, the mad scientist; Fribby, a robot dragon obsessed with death; and Metheldra, a healer specializing in acupuncture with swords. But finally it is Gork's biggest perceived weakness, his huge heart, that will guide him through his epic quest and help him reach his ultimate destination: planet Earth. A love story, a fantasy, and a coming-of-age story, Gork the Teenage Dragon is a wildly comic, beautifully imagined, and deeply heartfelt debut novel that shows us just how human a dragon can be.
The Gorse Trilogy
by Patrick Hamilton'I recommend Hamilton at every opportunity, because he was such a wonderful writer and yet is rather under-read today. All his novels are terrific' Sarah Waters'If you were looking to fly from Dickens to Martin Amis with just one overnight stop, then Hamilton is your man' Nick HornbyPatrick Hamilton's novels were the inspiration for Matthew Bourne's new dance theatre production, The Midnight Bell.Ernest Ralph Gorse's heartlessness and lack of scruple are matched only by the inventiveness and panache with which he swindles his victims. With great deftness and precision Hamilton exposes how his dupes' own naivete, snobbery or greed make them perfect targets. These three novels are shot through with the brooding menace and sense of bleak inevitability so characteristic of the author. There is also vivid satire and caustic humour. Gorse is thought to be based on the real-life murderer Neville Heath, hanged in 1946.
Goshawk Squadron
by Derek RobinsonWorld War One pilots were the knights of the sky, and the press and public idolised them as gallant young heroes. At just twenty-three, Major Stanley Woolley is the old man and commanding officer of Goshawk Squadron. He abhors any notion of chivalry in the clouds and is determined to obliterate the decent, gentlemanly outlook of his young, public school-educated pilots - for their own good. But as the war goes on he is forced to throw greener and greener pilots into the meat grinder. Goshawk Squadron finds its gallows humour and black camaraderie no defence against a Spandau bullet to the back of the head.