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High Vaultage: ‘High Vaultage positively crackles with invention and intrigue!’ – Helen Marshall
by Chris Sugden Jen SugdenEVEN GREATER LONDON, 1887. An uninterrupted urban plane encompassing the entire lower half of England and, for complex reasons, only the upper third of the Isle of Wight. The immense Tower casts electricity through the sky, powering the mind-boggling mechanisms of the city. The engineer-army of Isambard Kingdom Brunel swarms across the capital, building, demolishing, and rebuilding whatever they see fit. And at the heart of it all sits the country's first private detective agency.Archibald Fleet and Clara Entwhistle hoped things would pick up quickly for their new enterprise. No-one is taking them seriously, but their break will come soon. Definitely. Probably.Meanwhile, police are baffled by a series of impossible bank robberies, their resources absorbed by the case. Which means that when a woman witnesses a kidnapping, Fleet-Entwhistle Private Investigations is the only place she can turn for help. They're more than happy to oblige!But what's the motive behind the kidnap? As Clara and Fleet investigate, they find more than they could ever have imagined . . .From the creators of the acclaimed audio drama podcast Victoriocity comes a hilarious novel set in the greatest, most chaotic city in history. Twisty, inventive, and joyously funny, High Vaultage is perfect for fans of Ben Aaronovitch, Douglas Adams, and Terry Pratchett.
High Vaultage: ‘High Vaultage positively crackles with invention and intrigue!’ – Helen Marshall
by Chris Sugden Jen SugdenEVEN GREATER LONDON, 1887. An uninterrupted urban plane encompassing the entire lower half of England and, for complex reasons, only the upper third of the Isle of Wight. The immense Tower casts electricity through the sky, powering the mind-boggling mechanisms of the city. The engineer-army of Isambard Kingdom Brunel swarms across the capital, building, demolishing, and rebuilding whatever they see fit. And at the heart of it all sits the country's first private detective agency.Archibald Fleet and Clara Entwhistle hoped things would pick up quickly for their new enterprise. No-one is taking them seriously, but their break will come soon. Definitely. Probably.Meanwhile, police are baffled by a series of impossible bank robberies, their resources absorbed by the case. Which means that when a woman witnesses a kidnapping, Fleet-Entwhistle Private Investigations is the only place she can turn for help. They're more than happy to oblige!But what's the motive behind the kidnap? As Clara and Fleet investigate, they find more than they could ever have imagined . . .From the creators of the acclaimed audio drama podcast Victoriocity comes a hilarious novel set in the greatest, most chaotic city in history. Twisty, inventive, and joyously funny, High Vaultage is perfect for fans of Ben Aaronovitch, Douglas Adams, and Terry Pratchett.
High-Risk Homosexual: A Memoir
by Edgar Gomez*Winner of the American Book Award* *Winner of the Lambda Literary Award for Gay Memoir/Biography*An Honor Book for the 2023 Stonewall Book Award—Israel Fishman Non-Fiction Book AwardThis witty memoir traces a touching and often hilarious spiralic path to embracing a gay, Latinx identity against a culture of machismo—from a cockfighting ring in Nicaragua to cities across the U.S.—and the bath houses, night clubs, and drag queens who help redefine prideI&’ve always found the definition of machismo to be ironic, considering that pride is a word almost unanimously associated with queer people, the enemy of machistas . . . In a world desperate to erase us, queer Latinx men must find ways to hold on to pride for survival, but excessive male pride is often what we are battling, both in ourselves and in others.A debut memoir about coming of age as a gay, Latinx man, High-Risk Homosexual opens in the ultimate anti-gay space: Edgar Gomez&’s uncle&’s cockfighting ring in Nicaragua, where he was sent at thirteen years old to become a man. Readers follow Gomez through the queer spaces where he learned to love being gay and Latinx, including Pulse nightclub in Orlando, a drag queen convention in Los Angeles, and the doctor&’s office where he was diagnosed a &“high-risk homosexual.&”With vulnerability, humor, and quick-witted insights into racial, sexual, familial, and professional power dynamics, Gomez shares a hard-won path to taking pride in the parts of himself he was taught to keep hidden. His story is a scintillating, beautiful reminder of the importance of leaving space for joy.
High-Tech Ninja Heroes (The LEGO Ninjago Movie: Storybook)
by Michael PetranekAn 8x8 storybook based on the LEGO(R) Ninjago(R) Movie(TM)! Includes full-color images!
High-tech Terror (Green Lantern)
by Dan Schoening Michael A. SteeleWhile on intergalactic patrol, HAL JORDAN, a member of the GREEN LANTERN CORPS, receives a distress call. A nearby planet is under attack . . . by lawn mowers! All of the planet's machines have come alive. Cars, semi-trucks, even television sets, have transformed into deadly robots. Soon, HAL learns that a superpowered robot is behind the mechanical chaos . . . TEKIK, a member of the evil SINESTRO CORPS. To stop his mini machines, the GREEN LANTERN must stop TEKIK first. Unfortunately, pulling the plug on this super-villain won't be so easy.
Highfire: A Novel
by Eoin Colfer“True Detective meets Swamp Thing in the Artemis Fowl author’s neo-noirish thriller about a curmudgeonly dragon in Louisiana.” —GuardianFrom the New York Times bestselling author of the Artemis Fowl series comes a hilarious and high-octane adult novel about a vodka-drinking, Flashdance-loving dragon who lives an isolated life in the bayous of Louisiana—and the raucous adventures that ensue when he crosses paths with a fifteen-year-old troublemaker on the run from a crooked sheriff.In the days of yore, he flew the skies and scorched angry mobs—now he hides from swamp tour boats and rises only with the greatest reluctance from his Laz-Z-Boy recliner. Laying low in the bayou, this once-magnificent fire breather has been reduced to lighting Marlboros with nose sparks, swilling Absolut in a Flashdance T-shirt, and binging Netflix in a fishing shack. For centuries, he struck fear in hearts far and wide as Wyvern, Lord Highfire of the Highfire Eyrie—now he goes by Vern. However...he has survived, unlike the rest. He is the last of his kind, the last dragon. Still, no amount of vodka can drown the loneliness in his molten core. Vern’s glory days are long gone. Or are they?A canny Cajun swamp rat, young Everett “Squib” Moreau does what he can to survive, trying not to break the heart of his saintly single mother. He’s finally decided to work for a shady smuggler—but on his first night, he witnesses his boss murdered by a crooked constable. Regence Hooke is not just a dirty cop, he’s a despicable human being—who happens to want Squib’s momma in the worst way. When Hooke goes after his hidden witness with a grenade launcher, Squib finds himself airlifted from certain death by…a dragon?The swamp can make strange bedfellows, and rather than be fried alive so the dragon can keep his secret, Squib strikes a deal with the scaly apex predator. He can act as his go-between (aka familiar)—fetch his vodka, keep him company, etc.—in exchange for protection from Hooke. Soon the three of them are careening headlong toward a combustible confrontation. There’s about to be a fiery reckoning, in which either dragons finally go extinct—or Vern’s glory days are back.A triumphant return to the genre-bending fantasy that Eoin Colfer is so well known for, Highfire is an effortlessly clever and relentlessly funny tour-de-force of comedy and action.
Highfire: An absolutely thrilling, addictive, explosive page-turning fantasy adventure
by Eoin Colfer'A joyous fantasy for grownups' Guardian 'A funny, offbeat adult fantasy novel' Independent'A dazzling first adult novel from bestselling children's author Colfer' Daily MailHighfire is a genre-bending tour-de-force of comedy and action by the million-copy-selling master storyteller.Squib Moreau may be swamp-wild, but his intentions are (generally) good: he really wants to be a supportive son to his hard-working momma Elodie. But sometimes life gets in the way - like when Fake Daddy walked out on them leaving a ton of debt, or when crooked Constable Regence Hooke got to thinking pretty Elodie Moreau was just the gal for him . . . An apprenticeship with the local moonshine runner, servicing the bayou, looks like the only way to pay off the family debts and maybe get Squib and his momma a place in town, far from Constable Hooke's unwanted courtship and Fake Daddy's reputation. Unfortunately for Squib, Hooke has his own eye on that very same stretch of bayou - and neither of them have taken into account the fire-breathing dragon hiding out in the Louisiana swamp . . . For Squib Moreau, Regence Hooke and Vern, aka Lord Highfire of Highfire Eyrie, life is never going to be the same again.'Told in crunchy prose, with lashings of earthy dialogue, it reads like an Elmore Leonard Thriller, but with dragons . . . Colfer clearly had a blast writing this, and his sheer storytelling panache brushes aside the quibbles of fantasy-genre agnostics with infectious glee' Mail on SundayFrom the internationally bestselling author of the Artemis Fowl series: Eoin Colfer's first adult fantasy novel is a hilarious, high-octane adventure about a vodka-drinking, Flashdance-loving dragon who's been hiding out from the world - and potential torch-carrying mobs - in a Louisiana bayou . . . until his peaceful world's turned upside down by a well-intentioned but wild Cajun tearaway and the crooked (and heavily armed) law officer who wants him dead.
Highfire: An absolutely thrilling, addictive, explosive page-turning fantasy adventure
by Eoin ColferFrom the internationally bestselling author of the Artemis Fowl series: Eoin Colfer's first adult fantasy novel is a hilarious, high-octane adventure about a vodka-drinking, Flashdance-loving dragon who's been hiding out from the world - and potential torch-carrying mobs - in a Louisiana bayou . . . until his peaceful world's turned upside down by a well-intentioned but wild Cajun tearaway and the crooked (and heavily armed) law officer who wants him dead.Squib Moreau may be swamp-wild, but his intentions are (generally) good: he really wants to be a supportive son to his hard-working momma Elodie. But sometimes life gets in the way - like when Fake Daddy walked out on them leaving a ton of debt, or when crooked Constable Regence Hooke got to thinking pretty Elodie Moreau was just the gal for him . . . An apprenticeship with the local moonshine runner, servicing the bayou, looks like the only way to pay off the family debts and maybe get Squib and his momma a place in town, far from Constable Hooke's unwanted courtship and Fake Daddy's reputation. Unfortunately for Squib, Hooke has his own eye on that very same stretch of bayou - and neither of them have taken into account the fire-breathing dragon hiding out in the Louisiana swamp . . . For Squib Moreau, Regence Hooke and Vern, aka Lord Highfire of Highfire Eyrie, life is never going to be the same again.HIGHFIRE: A triumphant genre-bending tour-de-force of comedy and action by the million-copy-selling master storyteller(p) 2019 HarperCollins Audio
Highland Fling
by Nancy MitfordIn Highland Fling--Nancy Mitford's first novel, published in 1931--a set of completely incompatible and hilariously eccentric characters collide in a Scottish castle, where bright young things play pranks on their stodgy elders until the frothy plot climaxes in ghost sightings and a dramatic fire. Inspired in part by Mitford's youthful infatuation with a Scottish aristocrat, her story follows young Jane Dacre to a shooting party at Dulloch Castle, where she tramps around a damp and chilly moor on a hunting expedition with formidable Lady Prague, xenophobic General Murgatroyd, one-eyed Admiral Wenceslaus, and an assortment of other ancient and gouty peers of the realm, while falling in love with Albert, a surrealist painter with a mischievous sense of humor. Lighthearted and sparkling with witty banter, Highland Fling was Mitford's first foray into the delightful fictional world for which the author of The Pursuit of Love and Love in a Cold Climate later became so celebrated.With an Introduction by Julian Fellowes, creator of Downton Abbey.
Highland Treasure: Highland Brides (Highland Brides #9)
by Lynsay SandsA Buchanan brother finds a love to treasure in this scintillating historical romance from New York Times bestselling author Lynsay Sands… After escaping from the English soldiers who attacked her home and imprisoned her in a dungeon, Lady Elysande de Valance is grateful for the rugged Scots who are escorting her to safety in the Highlands. <P><P>Even with danger dogging their every step, she hadn’t expected to welcome the strong comforting embrace of their leader, Rory Buchanan. They say he’s a healer, but she finds the heat of his touch does so much more… <P><P>Let his brothers get married—Rory is too busy tending to the sick to be bothered with wooing a bride. But when he is tasked with accompanying a family friend’s “treasure” to the Highlands, he is surprised to learn the treasure is a beautiful woman on the run—and even more surprised to discover bruises hidden by her veil. Rory makes it his mission to tend to her injuries and protect her, but the thought of losing her makes him realize that perhaps it is his heart that is most in need of healing… <P><P> <b>A New York Times Bestseller</b>
Highland Wolf: Highland Brides (Highland Brides #10)
by Lynsay SandsNew York Times Bestselling Author Lynsay Sands delivers another sexy historical romance set in the wilds of the HighlandsIn all her daydreams about her wedding day, Lady Claray MacFarlane never once imagined being dragged to the altar by her greedy uncle and forced to marry a man she didn’t know. But that’s what happened, or would have, had a Highland warrior not snatched her up at the last minute and ridden off with her in his arms. . .They call him the Wolf. The mercenary’s courage and prowess in battle are known throughout the Highlands, and with his handsome face and black-as-sin hair, he is as intelligent and deadly as the wolf he was named for…But the Wolf is also Claray’s betrothed. Thought to have been killed as a child, he’s been in hiding all these years. Now he’s determined to earn enough coin to rebuild his home, reclaim his birthright, and honor his marriage contract to Claray. For he’s fallen for the tender-hearted lass…and he will do anything to protect her and their future together.
Highlander Taken (Clan Mackenzie)
by Juliette MillerIn this historical romance, an arranged marriage forces a Scottish warrior and a maiden to confront passion and treachery.To secure her family’s alliance with the powerful Clan Mackenzie, Stella Morrison has no choice but to wed the notorious Kade Mackenzie. Unable to ignore the whispers that surround him, she resigns herself to a marriage in name only. Yet as the fierce warrior strips away Stella’s doubt one seductive touch at a time, burgeoning desire forces her to question all she holds as truth.Leading a rebellious army should have been Kade’s greatest challenge—but conquering the heart of his reluctant bride becomes an all-consuming need. Now more than ever, he’s determined to find victory both on the battlefield and in the bedchamber. But the quest for triumph unleashes a dark threat, and this time, only love may prove stronger than danger.Praise for Highlander Claimed“A stunning debut . . . It’s an action-packed romance full of fierce warriors, strong women, rebelling clans and secrets worth killing for.” —RT Book Reviews
Highly Inappropriate Tales for Young People
by Douglas CouplandIn the grand tradition of Edward Gorey's Gashlycrumb Tinies, Tim Burton's Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy and Hillaire Belloc's Cautionary Tales for Children, comes Douglas Coupland and Graham Roumieu's Highly Inappropriate Tales for Young People.Ever wonder what would happen if Douglas Coupland's unhinged imagination met Graham Roumieu's insane knack for illustrating the ridiculously weird? The answer is seven deliciously wicked tales featuring seven highly improbable, not only inappropriate, characters, including Donald the Incredibly Hostile Juice Box, Hans the Weird Exchange Student, Brandon the Action Figure with Issues and Kevin the Hobo Minivan with Extremely Low Morals. If you are over the age of consent, seriously weird or just like to laugh, you'll love the unlovable miscreants who unleash their dark and unruly desires on every page of these unsuitable, completely hilarious tales.
Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute
by Talia HibbertFrom the New York Times bestselling author of the Brown Sisters trilogy, comes a laugh-out-loud YA novel about a quirky content creator and a clean-cut athlete testing their abilities to survive the great outdoors - and each other.Could you brave the wilderness with your HIGHLY SUSPICIOUS and UNFAIRLY CUTE ex-best friend? BRADLEY GRAEME is pretty much perfect: he's a star football player, manages his OCD well (enough) and comes out on top in all his classes . . . except the ones he shares with CELINE BANGURA. They used to be best friends, until Brad decided he was too cool for conspiracy-theory-obsessed Celine and abandoned her for the popular kids' table. (At least, that's how Celine sees it.) These days, there's nothing between them but insults and academic rivalry. So when Celine signs up for a two-part survival course in the woods, the last thing she expects is to find Brad right beside her. Forced to work as a team for the chance to win the grand prize, Celine and Bradley must trudge through not just mud and dirt but their messy past. As this adventure brings them closer together, they start to remember all the good parts of their history. But has too much time passed . . . or just enough to spark a whole new kind of relationship?Praise for Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute'A pure delight. This book is confirmation: no one does love stories like Talia Hibbert' LEAH JOHNSON, bestselling author of You Should See Me in a Crown'An effervescent, funny, tender, and joyous story' YAMILE SAIED ME´NDEZ, award-winning author of Furia'A razor-sharp, witty enemies-to-lovers rom-com. Readers will laugh out loud and swoon at the same time. Simply unputdownable' EMIKO JEAN, New York Times bestselling author of Tokyo Ever After'Hibbert delivers yet another swoon-worthy romance filled with banter that made me grin like a fool from one page to the next. I dare you not to fall in love' JESSE Q. SUTANTO, bestselling author of Dial A for Aunties
Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute
by Talia HibbertFrom the New York Times bestselling author of the Brown Sisters trilogy, comes a laugh-out-loud YA novel about a quirky content creator and a clean-cut athlete testing their abilities to survive the great outdoors - and each other.Could you brave the wilderness with your HIGHLY SUSPICIOUS and UNFAIRLY CUTE ex-best friend? BRADLEY GRAEME is pretty much perfect: he's a star football player, manages his OCD well (enough) and comes out on top in all his classes . . . except the ones he shares with CELINE BANGURA. They used to be best friends, until Brad decided he was too cool for conspiracy-theory-obsessed Celine and abandoned her for the popular kids' table. (At least, that's how Celine sees it.) These days, there's nothing between them but insults and academic rivalry. So when Celine signs up for a two-part survival course in the woods, the last thing she expects is to find Brad right beside her. Forced to work as a team for the chance to win the grand prize, Celine and Bradley must trudge through not just mud and dirt but their messy past. As this adventure brings them closer together, they start to remember all the good parts of their history. But has too much time passed . . . or just enough to spark a whole new kind of relationship?Praise for Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute'A pure delight. This book is confirmation: no one does love stories like Talia Hibbert' LEAH JOHNSON, bestselling author of You Should See Me in a Crown'An effervescent, funny, tender, and joyous story' YAMILE SAIED ME´NDEZ, award-winning author of Furia'A razor-sharp, witty enemies-to-lovers rom-com. Readers will laugh out loud and swoon at the same time. Simply unputdownable' EMIKO JEAN, New York Times bestselling author of Tokyo Ever After'Hibbert delivers yet another swoon-worthy romance filled with banter that made me grin like a fool from one page to the next. I dare you not to fall in love' JESSE Q. SUTANTO, bestselling author of Dial A for Aunties
Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute
by Talia HibbertFrom the New York Times bestselling author of the Brown Sisters trilogy, comes a laugh-out-loud story about a quirky content creator and a clean-cut athlete testing their abilities to survive the great outdoors—and each other.Bradley Graeme is pretty much perfect. He&’s a star football player, manages his OCD well (enough), and comes out on top in all his classes . . . except the ones he shares with his ex-best friend, Celine. Celine Bangura is conspiracy-theory-obsessed. Social media followers eat up her takes on everything from UFOs to holiday overconsumption—yet, she&’s still not cool enough for the popular kids&’ table. Which is why Brad abandoned her for the in-crowd years ago. (At least, that&’s how Celine sees it.)These days, there&’s nothing between them other than petty insults and academic rivalry. So when Celine signs up for a survival course in the woods, she&’s surprised to find Brad right beside her.Forced to work as a team for the chance to win a grand prize, these two teens must trudge through not just mud and dirt but their messy past. And as this adventure brings them closer together, they begin to remember the good bits of their history. But has too much time passed . . . or just enough to spark a whole new kind of relationship?
Hilarious Fishing Cartoons: 300 Hilarious Cartoons By John Troy (Lyons Press Ser.)
by Nick Lyons Doris Troy John TroyAny angler who has ever been out-fished by a beginner with a twig and some twine or questioned whether bass are smarter than he is will be in good company here. Hilarious Fishing Cartoons pokes fun at every kind of angling absurdity. Tiers struggling to tie microscopic flies, bass fishermen who catch more boots than bass, weekenders loaded down with every gizmo and piece of tackle in the shop, and fanatical, freezing ice fishermen doomed to drill and not grill are all represented. Troy's pen is deft and clever, and his one-liners are truly side-splitting. The next time your line gets so tangled you're ready to curse or quit fishing forever, remember these cartoons and you may just find yourself chuckling instead.
Hilarious Hunting Cartoons: 300 Hilarious Cartoons By John Troy
by Nick Lyons John TroyNo one understands the challenges and frustrations of the outdoorsman's life like John Troy, and no one makes the maddening business of hunting so riotously funny. Anyone still kicking himself over a missed shot, anyone wishing that his hunting dog had paid more attention in obedience school, or anyone who has ever been confounded by the antics of a pesky squirrel will enjoy this hugely delightful collection. In typical John Troy style, readers are treated to one-panel lampoons of shooters who can't hit stuffed animals, bears that beat up hunters, and ducks that make their own decoys. They're funny because they're true. Hilarious Hunting Cartoons will delight both novice and experienced hunters and will make an excellent gift for the passionate hunter.
Hilarious Hunting and Fishing Cartoons
by John TroyAny angler who has ever been out-fished by a beginner with a twig and some twine or questioned whether bass are smarter than he is will be in good company here. Hilarious Fishing Cartoons pokes fun at every kind of angling absurdity. Tiers struggling to tie microscopic flies, bass fishermen who catch more boots than bass, weekenders loaded down with every gizmo and piece of tackle in the shop, and fanatical, freezing ice fishermen doomed to drill and not grill are all represented. Troy's pen is deft and clever, and his one-liners are truly side-splitting. The next time your line gets so tangled you're ready to curse or quit fishing forever, remember these cartoons and you may just find yourself chuckling instead. No one understands the challenges and frustrations of the outdoorsman's life like John Troy, and no one makes the maddening business of hunting so riotously funny. Anyone still kicking himself over a missed shot, anyone wishing that his hunting dog had paid more attention in obedience school, or anyone who has ever been confounded by the antics of a pesky squirrel will enjoy this hugely delightful collection. In typical John Troy style, we are treated to one-panel lampoons of shooters who can't hit stuffed animals, bears that beat up hunters, and ducks that make their own decoys. They're funny because they're true. Hilarious Hunting Cartoons will delight both novice and experienced hunters and will make an excellent gift for yourself or a passionate hunter you know.
Hilarious Jokes for Minecrafters: Mobs, Creepers, Skeletons, and More (Jokes for Minecrafters #2)
by Steven Michele Hollow Jordon HollowJokes for Minecrafters: Mobs, Creepers, Skeletons, and More is the second book in the Jokes for Minecrafters series, which boasts more than eight hundred jokes. The jokes inside poke fun at everything Minecraft from ghasts to Endermen. All of your favorite parts of the Minecraft game are included in the book and the jokes will make you giggle like you’ve never giggled before! Inside you will find uproarious jokes like: Why don’t they have Knock, Knock jokes in Minecraft? Because Hostile Mobs don’t knock on your door--they blow it up! What do you get when you cross an Endermen with a creeper? A teleporting bomb. For kids ages 5 and up, this is the perfect book for at home, at school, or really anywhere! You’ll enjoy telling these silly jokes to your friends and family! As a bonus there are silly illustrations throughout for extra laughs!
Hilarious Knock-Knock Jokes
by Highlights For ChildrenThese collections of time-tested riddles and knock-knock jokes from Highlights will trigger a giggle attack every time kids open them. With a wealth of jokes and riddles, Guess Again! and Who's There? are perfect for sharing laughs with friends and family. The hilarious illustrations by Kevin Rechin and Kelly Kennedy add to the fun.
Hilarious Lawyer Jokes: An Illustrated Caseload of Jurisprudential Jests
by Steven D. Price Marty BucellaWhat is it about lawyers that has made them the butt of hundreds and hundreds of jokes over the centuries? Whatever the reason, everyone-including lawyers and judges themselves-has had a hearty chuckle over attorney-aimed humor. Hilarious Lawyer Jokes pokes the most fun (and malice) at a profession that has been targeted with humorous jabs for centuries.From this single hilarious source, with full-color illustrations, get your one-liners (Q: How many lawyer jokes are there? A: Only three. The rest are true stories.), your historical and literary quotations (Litigation: A machine that you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage-Ambrose Bierce: The Devil's Dictionary), and all the lengthier, fun-to-share forensic funnies you can handle, such as:A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not his driving, he smashed into a tree. He miraculously survived, but his car was totaled. "My BMW! My BMW!" he sobbed.A good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding. And, my god, your left arm is gone!"The lawyer looked down and screamed, "My Rolex! My Rolex!"In summation, you must find Hilarious Lawyer Jokes guilty of disorder in court and sentence all who read this perfect gift for any lawyer, client, judge, law student, or wannabe attorney to many hours of laughter.
Hilarious, Heartwarming Heroines: Four Novels
by Sophie KinsellaNobody does smart, screwball romantic comedy quite like Sophie Kinsella, #1 New York Times bestselling author of the beloved Shopaholic series. In these four stand-alone novels, Kinsella's charming heroines juggle work life, love life--and sometimes, even the afterlife--to heartwarming and hilarious effect. This must-have eBook bundle includes:CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET?"Move over, Bridget [Jones]! . . . Kinsella's witty take on mundane office and family life will really make you laugh out loud."--Evening Chronicle (UK)Emma Corrigan has a huge heart, an irrepressible spirit, and a few little secrets. Secrets from her boyfriend, secrets from her mother . . . secrets she wouldn't share with anyone in the world. Until she spills them all to a handsome stranger on a plane, who, she later discovers, just so happens to be Jack Harper, her company's elusive CEO--a man who now knows every humiliating detail about her.THE UNDOMESTIC GODDESS"Another charming winner from the delightful Kinsella."--BooklistSamantha Sweeting, a workaholic attorney at a London law firm, has just made a huge, unthinkable mistake, wrecking her chance of becoming partner. Going into utter meltdown, she walks out of her office, boards a train, and ends up in the middle of nowhere. Asking for directions at a big, beautiful house, she's mistaken for an interviewee and is offered a job as their housekeeper. And as she figures out how to turn on the oven and how to open the #@%# ironing board, she finds that this new life may be exactly what she is looking for.REMEMBER ME?"A delicious page-turner."--USA TodayWhen twenty-eight-year-old Lexi Smart wakes up in a London hospital, she's in for a big surprise. Having survived a car accident, Lexi has lost a big chunk of her memory--three years to be exact--and somehow she's gone from being a twenty-five-year-old working girl to being a corporate big shot with a sleek loft, a personal assistant, and a gorgeous husband. Will she ever remember how this all came to be? And what will happen when she does?TWENTIES GIRL"Kinsella [is] a master of comic pacing and feminine wit."--Publishers WeeklyLara Lington's imagination seems to be in overdrive. Normal twenty-something young women don't get visited by ghosts. Or do they? When the spirit of Lara's great-aunt Sadie mysteriously appears, she has one request: Lara must find a missing necklace that was in Sadie's possession for more than seventy-five years. And in their mission, these very different "twenties" girls learn some surprising truths from and about each other.BONUS: This eBook bundle also includes an excerpt from Sophie Kinsella's Wedding Night.
Hilariously Lame Jokes!: 800 of the Best Worst Jokes That Get a Side-splitting Laugh (or at Least an Eye-rolling Groan)
by Harry HiltonDid you hear about the wall that went out on the town for its birthday?It got plastered. What happened to the illegally parked frog? He got toad away. Why do seagulls fly over the sea?Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels.What did one plate say to the other plate?Lunch is on me! What did the computer do at lunchtime?Had a byte. Why did the duck get sent off the basketball court?For fowl play. Did you hear about the burglar who fell in the cement mixer?Now he&’s a hardened criminal.What did the manicurist call her son?Hans. What do you call cheese that isn&’t yours?Nacho cheese! Why did the picture go to prison?Because it was framed.
Hilarity Ensues
by Tucker MaxTucker Max's third and final book in his series of stories about his drunken debauchery and ridiculous antics. What began as a simple sentence on an obscure website, "My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole," and developed into two infamously genre-defining books, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell and Assholes Finish First, ends here. But as you should expect from Tucker by now, he is going out with a bang--literally and figuratively. In this book, you'll learn: * How to live and work in Cancun, while still enrolled in Law School, * Why Halloween is really awesome, * How to subtly torture a highstrung roommate until he explodes with furious anger over a misplaced condiment, * What really happened when a dirty pageant girl tried to sue Tucker because he told the truth, * Why you should never accept a homemade treat from a hippie with a van, and * What happens when Tucker turns sexting into a sport. He's still Tucker Max, and--for one more book--he's still an asshole.