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Joey and Johnny, the Ninjas: Epic Fail (Joey And Johnny, The Ninjas Ser. #2)
by Kevin Serwacki Chris PallaceThat’s so ninja! Epic Fail is the second book in the insanely funny and action-packed Joey and Johnny, the Ninjas series about two best friends and ninjas-in-training—perfect for fans of Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Origami Yoda.Things are getting back to normal at Kickfoot Academy after its Battle Royal with rival ninja school Red Moon Clan—for the most part. Joey and Johnny soon discover that their friend Peoni is secretly planning a tea ceremony—one of the most dangerous events a ninja can attend—to appease the spirits of ninjas past. Sounds like the perfect mission for Joey and Johnny!Eager to put their ninja skills to the test and set off on a new quest, the boys invite themselves along on Peoni’s journey to hunt down important items for the party. But it quickly becomes clear that there is a lot more in store for these young ninjas than tea. . . .
Joey and Johnny, the Ninjas: Get Mooned
by Kevin Serwacki Chris PallaceJoey and Johnny, the Ninjas: Get Mooned is the first book in a clever, insanely funny, and highly entertaining illustrated series about two best friends and ninjas-in-training, perfect for fans of the Origami Yoda series.Joey and Johnny are best friends, but they could not be more different. Joey follows all the rules. Johnny doesn't know what rules are. Joey is strategic. Johnny leaves everything up to chance. Joey is serious. Johnny is . . . well, he carries a clown hammer and wears a dooly-bopper on his head. But there is something these two boys have in common: They are ninjas. And they're both students at Kick Foot Academy, the premier ninja school in Lemming Falls.But Kick Foot Academy's reputation is about to be put to the test. Their rivals at Red Moon Clan have mysteriously come into possession of state-of-the-art weapons--something that is totally not ninja. And now they have challenged Kick Foot Academy to a Test of Three, culminating in an epic Battle Royal. The outcome will determine which ninja school reigns supreme . . . and which shuts down forever.
Jogger's Big Adventure (Early Reader Ser.)
by Francesca Simon Emily BolamEarly Readers are stepping stones from picture books to reading books. A blue Early Reader is perfect for sharing and reading together. A red Early Reader is the next step on your reading journey.Jogger the hamster is on an adventure, nibbling on books and climbing on chairs. But mean old Sour Puss is about - will Jogger make it back to his cage in time?
Jogger's Big Adventure (Early Reader)
by Francesca SimonEarly Readers are stepping stones from picture books to reading books. A blue Early Reader is perfect for sharing and reading together. A red Early Reader is the next step on your reading journey.Jogger the hamster is on an adventure, nibbling on books and climbing on chairs. But mean old Sour Puss is about - will Jogger make it back to his cage in time?
Jogos de Sociedade
by Alessandra Cesana Guilherme BorgesOs Paige são um casal norteamericano que vivem em Provence. Viajam para Paris, onde mora sua fútil filha Alexia, os Dunckan e a sedutora, dona de um cassino, Lhéa Mavelle. Lá, se encontrarão também com o atraente e cínico jogador Jake Wynner e viverão intensas emoções envolvendo enganos, infidelidades e chantagens que desestabilizarão as relações entre as pessoas de seu meio. Com este novo romance, a escritora Alessandra Cesana nos mergulha no mundo da alta sociedade, repleto de situações obscuras, mas as tornando muito agradáveis. Sua mudança total de estilo é novo e atual, ao mesmo tempo que é surpreendente e interessante.
Jogos de Vingança
by Sky CorganCaleb Ryan foi o único homem que amei. O único cara que até mesmo reconheceu minha existência quando estávamos juntos no ensino médio. Mas então ele me traiu ... Passei anos tentando superar o que ele havia feito comigo, aperfeiçoando meu ódio até estar afiado como uma faca. Agora eu finalmente tenho a chance de me vingar. Ele nem vai ver isso chegando. Eu pretendo me livrar dele, não importa o que for preciso. O único problema é que preciso dele para atingir outro objetivo. Quer eu goste ou não, vamos ter que trabalhar juntos. Mas ainda pretendo fazê-lo pagar.
Johannes Cabal the Detective
by Jonathan L. HowardJohannes Cabal, necromancer of some little infamy, returns in this riotously clever and terrifically twisted tale of murder and international intrigue. In this genre-twisting novel, infamous necromancer Johannes Cabal, after beating the Devil and being reunited with his soul, leads us on another raucous journey in a little-known corner of the world. This time he's on the run from the local government. Stealing the identity of a minor bureaucrat, Cabal takes passage on the Princess Hortense, a passenger aeroship that is leaving the country. The deception seems perfect, and Cabal looks forward to a quiet trip and a clean escape, until he comes face-to-face with Leonie Barrow, an enemy from the old days who could blow his cover. But when a fellow passenger throws himself to his death, or at least that is how it appears, Cabal begins to investigate out of curiosity. His minor efforts result in a vicious attempt on his own life--and then the gloves come off. Cabal and Leonie--the only woman to ever match wits with him--reluctantly team up to discover the murderer. Before they are done, there will be more narrow escapes, involving sword fighting and newfangled flying machines. There will be massive destruction, not to mention resurrected dead . . . Steampunk meets the classic Sherlockian mystery in this rip-roaring adventure where anything could happen . . . and does.From the Hardcover edition.
Johannes Cabal the Necromancer (Johannes Cabal Series #1)
by Jonathan L. HowardThe page-turning first novel in the charmingly gothic, fiendishly funny Faustian series about a brilliant scientist who makes a deal with the Devil, twice. • "The spot-on work of a talented writer." —The Denver Post Johannes Cabal sold his soul years ago in order to learn the laws of necromancy. Now he wants it back. Amused and slightly bored, Satan proposes a little wager: Johannes has to persuade one hundred people to sign over their souls or he will be damned forever. This time for real. Accepting the bargain, Jonathan is given one calendar year and a traveling carnival to complete his task. With little time to waste, Johannes raises a motley crew from the dead and enlists his brother, Horst, a charismatic vampire to help him run his nefarious road show, resulting in mayhem at every turn.
John Henry and Paul Bunyan Play Baseball
by Wyatt BlassingamePaul Bunyan was a mighty fine hitter, but no one would throw to him. John Henry was a fabulous pitcher, but no one would catch for him. So, what were the baseball managers to do? Let them play each other, of course! Who wins, you want to know? Ah, you must read the book! I can tell you this, though; I bet you've never, ever seen a game like this one! Other books by Wyatt Blassingame are available in this library.
John Inman's Greatest Hits (Dreamspinner Press Bundles #6)
by John InmanHit author John Inman presents five novels of romance, from tongue in cheek to seriously chic--Shy: Funny what a couple of guys can accomplish when they're crazy about each other. Not even nine hundred chickens can stand in the way of true love.--Loving Hector: Hector's evil ex is dead set on holding on--even if it means kidnapping Hector to keep him from Dill forever! Now Dill has to pull an army together to rescue Hector, and just where the hell is he supposed to find an army? Gads, if only Dill could write books this interesting!--Hobbled: Danny had plans to come out this summer--maybe even get laid! He doesn't have time for ankle monitors and serial killers! Then ginger-haired Luke Jamison moves in next door. Gee. If Danny can survive it, this summer might not be so bad after all.--Serenading Stanley: Welcome to the Belladonna Arms, a rundown little apartment building perched atop a hill in downtown San Diego, home to the city's lost and lovelorn. While Roger tries to batter down Stanley's defenses, Stanley turns to his new neighbors to learn about love.--Spirit: Toss a murder, a hot young stud, an unexpected love affair, and a spooky-ass ghost with a weird sense of humor into Jason's summer plans, and you've got the makings for one hell of a ride.
John Lennon In His Own Write
by John Lennon Robert Freeman Yoko OnoAbout The AwfulI was bored on the 9th of Octover 1940 when, I believe, the Nasties were still booming us led by Madolf Heatlump (who only had one). Anyway they didn't get me. I attended to varicous schools in Liddypol. And still didn't pass -- much to my Aunties supplies. As a member of the most publified Beatles my (P, G, and R's) records might seem funnier to some of you than this book, but as far as I'm conceived this correction of short writty is the most wonderfoul larf I've every ready. God help and breed you all.
Johnny Carson
by Henry BushkinA revealing and incisive account of the King of Late Night at the height of his fame and power, by his lawyer, wingman, fixer, and closest confidantFrom 1962 until 1992, Johnny Carson hosted The Tonight Show and permeated the American consciousness. In the '70s and '80s he was the country's highest-paid entertainer and its most enigmatic. He was notoriously inscrutable, as mercurial (and sometimes cruel) off-camera as he was charming and hilarious onstage. During the apex of his reign, Carson's longtime lawyer and best friend was Henry Bushkin, who now shows us Johnny Carson with a breathtaking clarity and depth that nobody else could.From the moment in 1970 when Carson hired Bushkin (who was just twenty-seven) until the moment eighteen years later when they parted ways, the author witnessed and often took part in a string of escapades that still retain their power to surprise and fascinate us. One of Bushkin's first assignments was helping Carson break into a posh Manhattan apartment to gather evidence of his wife's infidelity. More than once, Bushkin helped his client avoid entanglements with the mob. Of course, Carson's adventures weren't all so sordid. He hosted Ronald Reagan's inaugural concert as a favor to the new president, and he prevented a drunken Dean Martin from appearing onstage that evening. Carson socialized with Frank Sinatra, Jack Lemmon, Jimmy Stewart, Kirk Douglas, and dozens of other boldface names who populate this atmospheric and propulsive chronicle of the King of Late Night and his world.But this memoir isn't just dishy. It is a tautly rendered and remarkably nuanced portrait of Carson, revealing not only how he truly was, but why. Bushkin explains why Carson, a voracious (and very talented) womanizer, felt he always had to be married; why he loathed small talk even as he excelled at it; why he couldn't visit his son in the hospital and wouldn't attend his mother's funeral; and much more. Bushkin's account is by turns shocking, poignant, and uproarious -- written with a novelist's eye for detail, a screenwriter's ear for dialogue, and a knack for comic timing that Carson himself would relish. Johnny Carson unveils not only the hidden Carson, but also the raucous, star-studded world he ruled.
Johnny Golden Boogers
by A. P. HernándezJohn is well beloved by his neighbors. And that's because of his boogers. They just so happen to be made of gold! That is why everyone in his town is rich and nobody works. But one fateful day, they are in for a big surprise. Come with us on this journey, as we unravel the tale within!
Johnny Hangtime
by Dan GutmanIt's a bird, It's a plane--no, It's Johnny Hangtime! Jumping off the Empire State Building, fighting on the wing of a biplane, and parachuting onto the back of a horse are all in a day's work for 13-year-old Johnny Thyme, a stunt kid known in the movie business as Johnny Hangtime. But Johnny's phenomenal feats are a movie industry secret. Ricky Corvette, the superstar teen for whom Johnny doubles, wants his fans to think he does his own stunts. Johnny's devoted to repeating the career of his legendary stuntman father, but what's he going to do when his favorite director asks him to perform the super-dangerous stunt that killed his father? Will following in his daredevil; dad's footsteps take him over the edge?
Johnny One-Eye: A Tale of the American Revolution
by Jerome Charyn"A rollicking tale."--Stacy Schiff, New York Times Book Review, Editors' Choice Johnny One-Eye is bringing about the rediscovery of one of the most "singular and remarkable [careers] in American literature" (Jonathan Yardley, Washington Post Book World). In this picaresque tour de force that reanimates Revolutionary Manhattan through the story of double agent John Stocking, the bastard son of a whorehouse madam and possibly George Washington, Jerome Charyn has given us one of the most memorable historical novels in years. As Johnny seeks to unlock the mystery of his birth and grapples with his allegiances, he falls in love with Clara, a gorgeous, green-eyed octoroon, the most coveted harlot of Gertrude's house. The wild parade of characters he encounters includes Benedict Arnold, the Howe brothers, "Sir Billy" and "Black Dick," and a manipulative Alexander Hamilton.Not since John Barth's The Sotweed Factor and Gore Vidal's Burr has a novel so dramatically re-created America's historical beginnings. Reading group guide included.
Johnny and the Bomb
by Terry PratchettTwelve-year-old Johnny Maxwell has a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. This has never been more true than when he finds himself in his hometown on May 21, 1941, over forty years before his birth!An accidental time traveler, Johnny knows his history. He knows England is at war, and he knows that on this day German bombs will fall on the town. It happened. It's history. And as Johnny and his friends quickly discover, tampering with history can have unpredictable--and drastic--effects on the future. But letting history take its course means letting people die. What if Johnny warns someone and changes history? What will happen to the future? If Johnny uses his knowledge to save innocent lives by being in the right place at the right time, is he doing the right thing? Mixing nail-biting suspense with outrageous humor, Terry Pratchett explores a classic time-travel paradox in Johnny Maxwell's third adventure.
Johnny and the Dead (Johnny Maxwell Trilogy #2)
by Terry PratchettSir Terry Pratchett, beloved and bestselling author of the Discworld fantasy series, explores the bonds between the living and the dead and proves that it's never too late to have the time of your life—even if it is your afterlife!Johnny Maxwell's new friends do not appreciate the term "ghosts," but they are, well, dead.The town council wants to sell the cemetery, and its inhabitants aren't about to take that lying down! Johnny is the only one who can see them, and and the previously alive need his help to save their home and their history. Johnny didn't mean to become the voice for the lifeless, but if he doesn't speak up, who will?Read more of Johnny Maxwell's adventures in Only You Can Save Mankind and Johnny and the Bomb!
Join the Club, Maggie Diaz
by Nina MorenoThis humorous and heartfelt middle-grade debut by Nina Moreno with illustrations by Courtney Lovett is perfect for fans of Celia C. Pérez and Terri Libenson, and any reader still deciding what their passion in life is."MAYBE I'M GOOD AT SOMETHING I DON'T EVEN KNOW ABOUT YET."Everyone in Maggie Diaz's life seems to be finding their true passion. The one thing that defines them as a person. Her best friends Zoey and Julian are too busy to hang out after school thanks to band and comics club. Mom is finishing her last semester in college. And Maggie’s perfect older sister Caro is perfectly-perfect at sports and tutoring.So Maggie cooks up a plan to join every club she can! But trying to fit in with type-A future leaders, gardening whizzes, and the fearless kids in woodshop is intimidating, exhausting, and seriously confusing. And juggling homework, friends, and all of her after-school activities is way harder than it looks.Seventh grade is all about figuring out who you are -- good thing Maggie Diaz has the perfect plan!
Joint Custody
by Lauren Baratz-Logsted Jackie LogstedA mischievous dog takes matters into his own paws when his beloved owners split up in this offbeat romantic comedy. The Man has custody Monday through Friday, The Woman has custody on the weekends. But that's not enough for Gatz, who will do anything to bring them back together—even if it kills him. And it almost did. Of course he knows chocolate is bad for him, especially two whole pounds of it, but it&’s the risk he&’s willing to take to get them back together. Gatz knows that The Man and The Woman are perfect for each other—how can they not see it too? She is an editor and he&’s a writer. She&’s a social butterfly and he&’s as introverted as a guy can get. After the misguided death-by-chocolate attempt, Gatz thinks he still has time. But when New Man—so handsome, so nice, so perfect—enters The Woman's life, he realizes he&’ll need to step up his game. And you know what they say: drastic times call for drastic doggy measures. A laugh-out-loud romance that will touch your heart and make you want a furry friend of your own.
Joke & Riddle Ballyhoo
by Jacqueline HorsfallBeastie bloopers, fiddle-de-riddles, creepy critters, tongue twisters, and so much more! Filled with hundreds of jokes of every type, this hilarious compilation is sure to tickle the funny bone and have kids screaming with laughter for hours on end. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato. What should you wear when you go to the beach with a monster? Sunscream. What did the skeleton say to the doctor? "This will cost me an arm and a leg!" Give this riddle a try: I have many teeth but cant chew. What am I? (A comb.) How fast do happy bikers ride? Ten smiles per hour--and there are even more smiles than that in here.
Joke-A-Palooza (Almost Naked Animals)
by Howie Dewin<P>Get in on the Almost Naked Animals fun with this joke book <P>Get ready to get silly! Juvenile humor abounds in this 64-page joke book based on the hit cartoon. Includes black-and-white illustrations throughout.
Joke-Performance in Africa: Mode, Media and Meaning (Routledge Contemporary Africa)
by Ignatius ChukwumahJokes have always been part of African culture, but never have they been so blended with the strains and gains of the contemporary African world as today. Joke-Performance in Africa describes and analyses the diverse aesthetics, forms, and media of jokes and their performance and shows how African jokes embody the anxieties of the time and space in which they are enacted. The book considers the pervasive phenomenon of jokes and their performance across Africa in such forms as local jests, street jokes, cartoons, mchongoano, ewhe-eje, stand-up comedy, internet sex jokes, and ‘comicast’ transmitted via modern technology media such as the TV, CDs, DVDs, the internet platforms of YouTube, Facebook, and other social arenas, as well as live performances. Countries represented are Egypt, Kenya, Malawi, Morocco, Nigeria, and Zambia, covering the North, West, East and Southern Africa. The book explores the description of the joke form from various perspectives, ranging from critical discourse analysis, interviews, humour theories, psychoanalysis, the postcolony and technauriture, to the interactive dramaturgy of joke-performances, irrespective of media and modes of performance. Containing insightful contributions from leading African scholars, the book acquaints readers with detailed descriptions of the diverse aesthetics of contemporary African jokes, thereby contributing to the current understanding of joke-performance in Africa. It will appeal to students and scholars of African studies, popular culture, theatre, performance studies and literary studies.
Jokelopedia: The Biggest, Best, Silliest, Dumbest Joke Book Ever!
by Ilana Weitzman Eva BlankIt&’s the mother of all kids&’ joke books—an all-encompassing, gut-busting, and bestselling collection of more than 1,700 jokes, tongue-twisters, riddles, and puns for all occasions. Here are 61 elephant jokes, including: What did the elephant say when he walked into the post office? / Ouch! Dozens of knock-knock jokes, like: Knock-knock. / Who&’s there? / Doris. / Doris who? / Doris locked. That&’s why I knocked! Plus teacher jokes and creature jokes, doctor jokes and robber jokes, food jokes, gross jokes, why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road jokes, and name-game jokes: What do you call a man in a tiger&’s cage? / Claude. And for all aspiring comedians, there are joke-telling pointers and tips, funny facts, and spotlights on comic TV shows, books, and actors, from Steve Carell to Tina Fey to SpongeBob Squarepants. It&’s the ultimate gift for the incurable jokester.
Jokes My Father Never Taught Me: Life, Love, and Loss with Richard Pryor
by Cathy Crimmins Rain PryorThe loving, witty, yet brutally honest memoir of the daughter of comedy legend Richard Pryor.Rain Pryor was born in the idealistic, free-love 1960s. Her mother was a Jewish go-go dancer who wanted a tribe of rainbow children. Rain’s father was Richard Pryor, perhaps the most compelling and brilliant comedian of his era, a man whose self-destructiveness was as legendary as his groundbreaking comedy.Jokes My Father Never Taught Me is an intimate, harrowing, poignant, and often hilarious memoir that explores the divided heritage and the forces that shaped a wildly schizophrenic childhood. It is the story of a girl who grew up adoring her father even as she feared him—and feared for him, as his drug problems got worse. Both lovingly told and painfully frank, it is an unprecedented look at the life of a comedy icon, told by a daughter who both understood the genius and knew the tortured man within.Praise for Jokes My Father Never Taught Me“Rain Pryor pulls no punches . . . Using the same profanity-laced wit her father perfected, she unspools darkly comic stories . . . but never devolves into self-pity or bitterness.” —Entertainment Weekly“Vital, entertaining and appalling, Pryor has fleshed out a familiar dysfunctional family refrain—”It was a lot easier to love him if you didn’t know him”—with bravery and wit.” —Publishers Weekly