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Newlywed Games
by Mary DavisEvery woman will relate to Newlywed Games, a hilarious romantic comedy about a "little white lie" that grows into a very big problem. Meghann Livingston invents a husband to soothe her dying mother. But when her mom miraculously recovers, then comes for a visit, Meghann is hard-pressed to explain her "husband's" absence! Before Meghann can come clean, her handsome, elusive boss, Bruce Halloway, inadvertently steps into her romantic charade ... and to Meghann's shock and horror, insists upon playing "son-in-law" to her mom. The masquerade's success depends upon them playing their newlywed games extremely well. But when they do, both Meghann and Bruce -- even as they struggle to overcome the consequences of their deceptions -- find themselves falling in love ... for real!From the Trade Paperback edition.
News for Dogs
by Lois DuncanFrom the beloved author comes the sequel to Hotel for Dogs. It’s up to Andi and her brother Bruce to foil the plans of evil dognappers.Now that Andi is no longer running a hotel for dogs, she decides to start a new project—a newspaper for dogs! With her brother Bruce and a few friends, the kids make a hit out of their paper. But they also attract the attention of some mysterious dognappers. Can the kids find the criminals and bring their dogs safely home?“Readers seeking wholesome fare will appreciate the resourceful characters. At bottom, it is the dogs, from loyal Red Rover to pampered Bully Bernstein, who should win best in show.” —Kirkus Reviews“A plot that mixes journalism and crime into a potpourri of canines and middle-school moralizing . . . kids with a yen for dogs and a low tolerance for suspense will be comfortable with this.” —Booklist
News of the Weird: Ironies
by Chuck ShepherdA school principal in Ohio resigning after admitting she lied about her income on federal forms so that her children could qualify for reduced-price school lunches, the writer of Elizabeth Taylor&’s New York Times obituary having died six years before Taylor, and a Christian pole-dancing class––just a few examples of the humorous anecdotes found in News of the Weird&’s &“Ironies,&” an e-book original that proves that truth is stranger than fiction.What started as a hobby among a few friends more than 25 years ago, Chuck Shepherd's News of the Weird, has grown to be the most widely syndicated compendium of strange-but-true news stories today. Shepherd has turned this hobby into a mission, and now with the aid of the Internet, he continues to present a weekly distillation of the best bizarre dispatches gathered from around the world.Not simply an aggregation of news feeds indiscriminately thrown together, News of the Weird contains items hand-picked by a man whose long experience in the realm of the unreal has given him a discerning eye. He would be the first to tell you that you really can't make this stuff up, nor do you need to. Drawing from legitimate reportage, Chuck has plenty of material to work with, and he delivers each story he selects with a dry wit that lets its human eccentricity stand for itself - no need for embellishment.
Newspaper Blackout
by Austin KleonPoet and cartoonist Austin Kleon has discovered a new way to read between the lines. Armed with a daily newspaper and a permanent marker, he constructs through deconstruction--eliminating the words he doesn't need to create a new art form: Newspaper Blackout poetry. Highly original, Kleon's verse ranges from provocative to lighthearted, and from moving to hysterically funny, and undoubtedly entertaining. The latest creations in a long history of "found art," Newspaper Blackout will challenge you to find new meaning in the familiar and inspiration from the mundane.Newspaper Blackout contains original poems by Austin Kleon, as well as submissions from readers of Kleon's popular online blog and a handy appendix on how to create your own blackout poetry.
Newt Nemesis (S.W.I.T.C.H. #8)
by Ali SparkesSummer camp was going great for Josh and Danny until mad scientist Petty Potts showed up. Sure, her serum turned them into frogs to help them save their new friend Charlie. But the serum didn't completely wear off: all three kids still have frog feet! They are running out of time to find right antidote before their parents show up. Their best option is to ask Petty to use her S.W.I.T.C.H. formula again. But of course, things don't turn out quite as planned. Do two frogs and a newt stand any chance in a world of hedgehogs, dogs, and poisonous snakes? Josh, Danny, and Charlie are about to find out.
Next Level Basic: The Definitive Basic Bitch Handbook
by Stassi SchroederDiscover how to embrace your best basic self in this instant New York Times bestselling, laugh-out-loud hilarious, and &“refreshing to read&” (The Cut) guidebook from the breakout star of Bravo&’s hit reality show Vanderpump Rules.Millions of Vanderpump Rules viewers and podcast listeners know Stassi Schroeder as a major defender of Basic Bitch rights. There&’s nothing more boring than people who take themselves too seriously. Stassi champions the things that many of us are afraid to love publicly for fear of being labeled basic: lattes, pugs, bubbly cocktails, millennial pink, #OOTD (outfit of the day, obvs), astrology, hot dogs, the perfect pair of Louboutins, romantic comedies...the list goes on and on. &“There&’s something for everyone under Schroeder&’s big basic umbrella&” (Elle) and in Next Level Basic, the reality star, podcast queen, and ranch dressing expert gives you hilarious and pointed lessons on how to have fun and celebrate yourself, with exclusive stories from her own life and on the set of Vanderpump Rules. From her very public breakups to her most intimate details about her plastic surgery, Stassi shares her own personal experiences with her trademark honesty—all with the hope you can learn something from them.
Next Time . . . Forever: A 2-in-1 Collection
by Sherryl WoodsSherryl Woods is the author of Feels Like Family, a Netflix Book Club Pick!BESTSELLING AUTHOR COLLECTIONReader-favorite romances in collectible volumes from our bestselling authors.REUNITED AT LAST Recently divorced and ready to move on, Catherine Devlin didn&’t expect to find love in a small restaurant in Savannah. Dillon Westin, a sexy businessman, charms her instantly. But Dillon is only passing through town, and since she&’s still nursing her heartbreak, Catherine needs to take their budding romance slow. They have busy lives and live in different cities—so they part ways with a soul-shattering kiss…and a promise to meet again in one year.They keep their promise—but their differences threaten to tear them apart. As the holidays approach, Catherine can&’t help but miss Dillon, so she follows him to New York City. But will the magic of Christmas make everything all right? Catherine can&’t help but wonder if &“next time&” will ever mean &“forever.&”FREE BONUS STORY INCLUDED IN THIS VOLUME!Secret Christmas Twins by Lee Tobin McClainChristmas came early for Erica Lindholm! Suddenly the adoptive mom of adorable twin baby boys, Erica is living her dream. Until the boys&’ estranged uncle, Jason Stephanidis, comes home to celebrate the holidays. Will Erica&’s secret cost her everything?Previously published.
Next-Door Nemesis
by Alexa MartinTwo rival candidates for a homeowner&’s association presidency are about to find out how dirty suburbanites fight in this steamy new romantic comedy from Alexa Martin. After years of hustling, Collins Carter has finally made it...back to her parents&’ house. Between tending to the compost with her newly retired dad and running into her high school nemesis at the only decent coffee shop in town, Collins realizes this subdivision from hell she swore she&’d never return to is her rock bottom. Then the homeowner&’s association complaint arrived. Nathaniel Adams always dreamed of a nice, quiet life in his suburban hometown. Or at least that&’s what he thought until Collins moved back and sent his quaint, organized life into a tailspin. He thought Collins was infuriating ten years ago, but when she announces she&’s running against him for HOA president, all bets are off. From secret board meetings to vicious smear campaigns whispered over backyard fences, Collins and Nate sink to levels their sleepy suburb has never seen before. But as hate turns into lust, these two enemies are forced to reckon with the feelings they&’ve ignored for years. If only there were bylaws for real life.
Next-Door Nemesis: Fall in love with this delightfully steamy, enemies-to-lovers, small-town rom-com!
by Alexa MartinTwo old high school best friends-turned-enemies find themselves in a rivalry for a homeowner's association presidency in this swoony and steamy small-town, enemies-to-lovers romance, perfect for fans of Talia Hibbert and Lyssa Kay Adams.'A hilariously fun rollercoaster of laughs and passion! Collins and Nathaniel have explosive chemistry and take suburban warfare to outrageously fun heights! Next-Door Nemesis is hate to love at its finest' SARAH ADAMS'Smart and sexy, Martin's Next Door Nemesis is a fun romantic romp about second chances, embracing the unexpected, and the beautiful things that can come from failure. A glorious read!' ASHLEY HERRING BLAKE'I've never had so much fun with a homeowner's association. Collins and Nate set those white picket fences on fire with their electric chemistry. Smoking hot and delightfully sharp, this book is one to add to your shelves' B.K. BORISON'Alexa Martin is a powerhouse!' ROSIE DANAN'Martin shines in this enchanting tale . . . the result is utterly entertaining' PUBLISHERS WEEKLY_________________________After years of hustling, Collins Carter has finally made it...back to her parents' house. Between tending to the compost with her newly retired dad and running into her high school nemesis at the only decent coffee shop in town, Collins realizes this subdivision from hell she swore she'd never return to is her rock bottom.Then the homeowner's association complaint arrived.Nathaniel Adams always dreamed of a nice, quiet life in his suburban hometown. Or at least that's what he thought until Collins moved back and sent his quaint, organized life into a tailspin. He thought Collins was infuriating ten years ago, but when she announces she's running against him for HOA president, all bets are off.From secret board meetings to vicious smear campaigns whispered over backyard fences, Collins and Nate sink to levels their sleepy suburb has never seen before. But as hate turns into lust, these two enemies are forced to reckon with the feelings they've ignored for years. If only there were bylaws for real life._________________________⭐ Readers love Alexa Martin! ⭐'My queen, Alexa Martin, knows exactly how to write perfect banter and this book will not disappoint . . . A romance that will tug at all your heartstrings''My favorite rom com I've read this year!''I ate this book up! It was just what I needed right now''Ooh this was a yummy book . . . such a happily-ever-after book and I'm here for it!''I honestly loved this amazing book! The characters, the story, the love, the friendships, every single thing . . . just simply a wonderful book!''A swoon-worthy new release . . . featuring some of your favorites in romance tropes, Friends to Lovers, One Bed, Forced Proximity, Better than Fiction will not disappoint!'
Ni Night, Alaska: Sometimes it's hard to fall asleep (Alaska Tales)
by Mike SpindleLittle Alaska is about to hibernate for the very first time. Something new! How is Alaska supposed to close his eyes with all this excitement? How can Alaska's parents get Alaska to hibernate?Follow along as Alaska counts salmon, has a drink, and sings songs to help him fall asleep.This charming story was created by noted illustrator and toy designer Mike Spindle, who has illustrated and sculpted such characters as Mickey Mouse, Winnie the Pooh, Care Bears, and the Muppets. The call of the wild brought Mike to Alaska. It was only natural that meet Miles, the Dall Sheep, and the little bear Alaska. These are the beginnings of the Alaska Tales.
Ni si ni no, sino todo lo contrario: Gran Test de máximas de la cultura colombiana
by Eduardo Arias Villa Karl Eduard Troller PardoCon irreverencia y su humor característico, Eduardo Arias y Karl Troller sacan a relucir las frases más icónicas de la historia colombiana y a los personajes que de una u otra forma, definen lo que representa ser colombiano. ¿Cree que el himno de Colombia es el segundo más bello del mundo? ¿Para celebrar un acuerdo de paz le dan ganas de salir al balcón y disparar unos tiros al aire? ¿No le cabe la menor duda de que fue gol de Yepes? Si respondió afirmativamente a estas tres preguntas es muy probable que su perfil se ajuste al de un colombiano excepcional. Este libro reúne de nuevo a Eduardo Arias y Karl Troller, quienes de una manera divertida e ingeniosa sacan a relucir las frases más icónicas de la historia del país y a los personajes que, de una u otra forma,definen lo que representa ser un buen colombiano. Y si aún le quedan dudas o quiere poner a prueba al familiar que ha vivido los últimos años en Estados Unidos, resuelva el test que encontrará en este libro. Lo más seguro es que en alguna pregunta no pueda evitar responder: "ni sí ni no, sino todo lo contrario"
Niagara Falls, Or Does It? (Hank Zipzer, the World's Greatest Underachiever #1)
by Henry Winkler Lin Oliver Tim HeitzFor Hank, fourth grade does not start out on the right foot. First of all, he gets called to the principal's office on the very first day of school. <P><P>Then the first assignment his teacher gives him is to write five paragraphs on "What You Did This Summer." Hank is terrified-writing one good sentence is hard for him, so how in the world is he going to write five whole paragraphs? Hank comes up with a plan: instead of writing what he did on vacation, he'll show what he did. But when Hank's "living essay" becomes a living disaster, he finds himself in detention. Strangely enough, however, detention ends up becoming a turning point in his life <p><b>Lexile Level: 610L</b></p>
Niagara Falls, or Does It? (Hank Zipzer, the World's Greatest Underachiever #1)
by Henry Winkler Lin OliverHank Zipzer wants to do well in fourth grade.<P><P> He's smart, creative and funny but writing a five paragraph essay about what he did last summer sounds impossible because he's not so good at writing, spelling or other school subjects. Since he can't write about Niagara Falls, he decides to build it. The idea sounds great and his friends are helping. To his amazement, his project doesn't go over at all well in school and now he may not be able to be in the magic show he and his pals Frankie and Ashley have cooked up.<P> As hard as Hank tries to do school assignments like other kids, he spends all of his energy trying to stay out of trouble because he can't do the work. Then he winds up in trouble anyway. Finally a teacher he meets while in detention has an idea that might help him in school and his parents begin to understand he actually has talents! Search for the author, Henry Winkler and find more funny books about Henry Zipzer in the Bookshare collection.
Niblet & Ralph
by Zachariah OHoraTwo pet cats switch places in this comically sweet story of mistaken identity, from beloved author-illustrator Zachariah OHora.Niblet and Ralph may look a lot alike, but they are very different. Niblet loves noshing on crunchy potato chips. Ralph loves putting on headphones and jamming to his favorite records. But both cats have one thing in common: They love being friends and waving to each other from their windows across the courtyard of the apartment building they live in.One day, Niblet and Ralph decide it's time to meet in person (or in cat?). But when they mistakenly end up at each other's apartments, their owners think that Niblet is Ralph, and Ralph is Niblet! Will Niblet and Ralph be able to switch back to their proper homes, or will they be stuck listening to music (ugh) and eating chips (gross) forever? Better still, will they be able to bring their lovable (if not very observant) human families together?With zany humor and bold, bright art, Zachariah OHora creates a purrrfect picture book for kids, adults, and pets of all ages to enjoy.
Nice
by Charles HoldeferJerry Renfrow runs an innovative freelance business. He helps others to be nice--for a price. Jerry deals in dreams and affections. A ferocious comedy and love story, Nice offers a rollercoaster of a read, a straight-on look at human foibles, and a sharp portrait of contemporary America.
Nice Earls Do (Goode's Guide to Misconduct)
by Susanna CraigThe prequel novella to a new series that offers a modern twist on the genre, from Susanna Craig, one of the most acclaimed voices in Regency romance. Will appeal to fans of Ella Quinn, Sabrina Jeffries, and those who love faster-paced, innovative historical romance featuring strong women. To readers of her popular book Mrs. Goode&’s Guide to Homekeeping, &“Mrs. Goode&” is an expert in all domestic matters. Household management, home décor, entertainment . . . there is nothing about which she lacks an opinion. Who better to assist the Earl of Stalbridge, newly appointed guardian to his niece and nephew, in turning his house into a home? The widowed Lady Manwaring is the farthest thing from a domestic doyenne, so when asked to pose as Mrs. Goode on behalf of the book&’s true author, she warily agrees. On arrival, she&’s surprised to discover that Lord Stalbridge is actually her childhood friend, Kit Killigrew. Tabetha might be an imposter, but her attraction to Kit is all too real . . . After years separated from the woman of his dreams, Kit&’s eager to do more than play house. Will Tabetha&’s big reveal ruin everything, or lay the foundation for true love? PRAISE FOR WHO&’S THAT EARL&“Craig delights with a fast-paced, intrigue-filled plot and expertly developed characters. Regency fans will eagerly anticipate future installments.&” —Publishers Weekly, STARRED review
Nice Girls Finish Last (The Robin Hudson Mysteries #2)
by Sparkle HayterReporter Robin Hudson gets the scoop on a DOA OB/GYN in this &“hilarious, keenly written romp&” from the author of What&’s a Girl Gotta Do? (Entertainment Weekly). A nice girl like Robin Hudson never expected to find herself at an S&M club, but as a third-string reporter for a tabloid TV news show, she must pursue all the sleazy leads her jerk boss hurls her way with a smile on her face—at least on camera. But this time the story hits close to home. Robin&’s always thought a person has to be a little sadistic to become a gynecologist, but when her new OB/GYN is shot through the heart and handcuffed to his office chair, a matchbook from an S&M establishment is the only clue. Much to the delight of Robin&’s muckraking boss, the not-so-good doctor had his hands in all sorts of sordid activities. But Robin, on the other hand, is having a hard time whipping up any enthusiasm to interview the dominatrix who runs the club. It&’s also the worst time for her Bible-toting Aunt Mo to visit New York City—aka Sodom and Gomorrah—to set Robin on the straight and narrow. Aunt Mo is convinced the streets aren&’t safe—and maybe she&’s right. A sniper is taking potshots at anxious All News Network anchormen, and it&’s starting to look like the target practice is connected to the dead doc. Now, it&’s up to Robin to dodge the bullets—not to mention Aunt Mo—and get the killer in her sights. And then she needs to find a new gynecologist! Nice Girls Finish Last is &“a rollicking blend of deftly aimed satire and neatly plotted murder mystery&” from award-winning author and former CNN journalist Sparkle Hayter, winner of the Sherlock Award for Best Comic Detective as well as an Arthur Ellis Award for best first mystery novel (The Philadelphia Inquirer). The Robin Hudson Mystery series is a winner of the Sherlock Award for Best Comic Detective. Nice Girls Finish Last is the 2nd book in the Robin Hudson Mysteries, but you may enjoy reading the series in any order.
Nice Is Just a Place in France: How to Win at Basically Everything
by The BetchesLOOK, MAYBE YOU'RE A NICE GIRL, but we're guessing you're more like us or you probably wouldn't have picked up this book. Not that we have a problem with girls who are nice people. But being nice is just not the way to get what you want. And this book is about getting what you want. Not in like a finding happiness, giving back to the world, being grateful for what you have sort of way. But in a ruling your world, being the most desired, powerful badass in the room way, so you can come out on top of any situation: guys, career, friends, enemies, whatever. How does a betch make that happen? Here are some highlights: DON'T BE EASY. DON'T BE POOR. DON'T BE UGLY. We didn't come up with these life lessons. We're just the ones who wrote it all down. This is not self-help. Self-help is for fat people and divorcées. This is how to deal with your problems when you have no problems. You're welcome.
Nice Shot, Cupid! (Myth-o-mania #4)
by Denis Zilber Kate McMullanHades lets readers in on the true story behind the myth of the Greek god Cupid and the mortal princess Psyche.
Nice Snowing You! #4
by Nancy Krulik Sebastien BraunHoping to escape the cold in his backyard, Sparky chomps on his magic bone--only to find himself in snowy Zermatt, Switzerland. He befriends Lena, a Saint Bernard rescue dog with a terrible sense of direction. The two, in search of food, quickly get lost. But Lena and Sparky might just be in the right place at the right time for Lena to complete her first ever rescue mission!
Nice Try, Jane Sinner
by Lianne OelkeIt’s Kind of a Funny Story meets Daria in the darkly hilarious tale of a teen’s attempt to remake her public image and restore inner peace through reality TV. The only thing 17-year-old Jane Sinner hates more than failure is pity. After a personal crisis and her subsequent expulsion from high school, she’s going nowhere fast. Jane’s well-meaning parents push her to attend a high school completion program at the nearby Elbow River Community College, and she agrees, on one condition: she gets to move out. Jane tackles her housing problem by signing up for House of Orange, a student-run reality show that is basically Big Brother, but for Elbow River Students. <P><P> Living away from home, the chance to win a car (used, but whatever), and a campus full of people who don't know what she did in high school… what more could she want? Okay, maybe a family that understands why she’d rather turn to Freud than Jesus to make sense of her life, but she'll settle for fifteen minutes in the proverbial spotlight. As House of Orange grows from a low-budget web series to a local TV show with fans and shoddy T-shirts, Jane finally has the chance to let her cynical, competitive nature thrive. She'll use her growing fan base, and whatever Intro to Psychology can teach her, to prove to the world—or at least viewers of substandard TV—that she has what it takes to win.
Nice Try: Stories of Best Intentions and Mixed Results
by Josh GondelmanNice Try is Emmy-Award winning writer and comedian Josh Gondelman’s collection of personal stories of best intentions and mixed results.“If you only read one book in your life, it probably shouldn’t be this one. However, if you’re not operating an inexplicable one-book policy, these stories are funny, touching, and more than worth your time.” —John Oliver“Josh Gondelman is one of the most original hilarious voices out there today. This book will hook you and make you laugh and laugh.” —Amy SchumerJosh Gondelman knows a thing or two about trying—and failing. The stand-up comic—dubbed a “pathological sweetheart” by the New York Observer—is known throughout the industry as one of comedy’s true “nice guys.” Not surprisingly, he’s endured his share of last-place finishes. But he keeps on bouncing back.In this collection of hilarious and poignant essays (including his acclaimed New York Times piece “What if I Bombed at My Own Wedding?”), Josh celebrates a life of good intentions—and mixed results. His true tales of romantic calamities, professional misfortunes, and eventual triumphs reinforce the notion: we get out of the world what we put into it. Whether he’s adopting a dog from a suspicious stranger, mitigating a disastrous road trip, or trying MDMA for the first (and only) time, Josh only wants the best for everyone—even as his attempts to do the right thing occasionally implode.Full of the warm and relatable humor that’s made him a favorite on the comedy club circuit, Nice Try solidifies Josh Gondelman’s reputation as not just a good guy, but a skilled observer of the human condition.
Nice Werewolves Don’t Bite Vampires (Half-Moon Hollow #16)
by Molly HarperThe “enchanting” (Publishers Weekly) Jane Jameson series is back with a new paranormal romantic comedy about a werewolf yearning to find her own place world, and the group of admittedly unique vampires who help her find love.Tylene McClaine, black sheep of the McClaine Half-Moon Hollow werewolf pack, has spent a lifetime blocking out the criticisms of her boisterous pack. They say she’s too bookish, too obstinate, and worst of all, too picky when it comes to finding a nice werewolf boy and settling down.But when she meets vampire and Half-Moon Hollow music teacher, Alex Bonfils, Tylene starts to wonder if she could create the life she’s always wanted. She takes every precaution to meet her sexy vamp in secret, but when a vandal around town starts targeting vampire businesses, she fears her family might have found her out. When the damage in town escalates, Tylene and Alex join forces with Jane Jameson, Dick Cheney, and the whole vampire gang to find the culprit save Half-Moon Hollow before it’s too late!
Nice and Mean
by Jessica LeaderMarina is mean. Sachi is nice. Marina is Barney's. Sachi is Burlington Coat Factory. It's bad enough they're forced to coexist in their middle-school's high-profile video elective--but now they're being forced to work together on the big semester project. Marina's objective? Out her wannabe BFF as a fashion victim to the entire middle school. Sachi's objective? Prove that she's not just the smiley class pencil-lender and broaden her classmates' cultural horizons. Work together in harmony? Yeah, that would be a "no." How can Sachi film something meaningful, and Marina, something fabulous, if they're yoked to each other?