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The Bachelor Home Companion: A Practical Guide to Keeping House Like a Pig
by P. J. O'Rourke<p>From P. J. O'Rourke, bestselling author and expert bachelor, comes a hilarious look at domestic life. Or, as P. J. puts it, "This is a book about cooking, cleaning, and housekeeping for people who don't know how to do any of those things and aren't about to learn." <p>In addition to debunking popular myths about bachelors (they are in fact not creatures known to hang around the house in silk smoking jackets, sipping brandy from oversized snifters) P. J. offers some useful sections on cleaning—or how best to avoid doing it: "Spill something fresh on the floor because a slippery floor is much more like a clean, waxed floor than a stinky floor is."; "Every month or so, take the curtains down-and throw them away. Turn the lights off if you don't want the neighbors to see what you're doing. The same goes for slipcovers."; "Don't use Drano if a toilet gets clogged. <p>Remembering, the toilet is a dog's idea of Perrier. And you don't want a dog with a melted tongue."; "Sheets can be kept clean by getting drunk and falling asleep with your clothes on." In the inimitable style that has made him one of America's most popular humorists, P. J. provides an essential guide to the practical business of living in the modern world and proves that.</p>
The Bachelor Next Door (Women To Watch Ser. #9)
by Katherine GarberaSINGLE MOM STUCK IN BATHTUB!Cass Gambrel groaned at the memory of Rafe Santini coming to the rescue! The infuriating man had freed her with a gleam in his eyes that said, "I'm interested...but not in commitment." Well, Cass sure didn't need a man like that.Rafe knew women just weren't happy until every man in town was wearing a wedding ring! But he had no intention of getting caught in that trap. Still, something about Cass had this bachelor losing sleep and wondering if it was time to end his wandering ways....
The Bachelor Project
by Victoria ChancellorAll the gossips in Ranger Springs were talking about the runaway bride who'd just come to town. And how she'd caught the eye of sexy police chief Ethan Parker. They'd all seen his car parked outside her house the first night she was in town. And after watching the two embrace on the front porch, nobody believed for a minute that he'd just come to check on some wayward raccoons! No, it seemed as if sweet Robin Cummings had caught the eye of this true-blood Texan who'd never quite made it to the altar. How could everyone in town help but start working on The Bachelor Project...?
The Bachelor's Baby Surprise
by Rebecca Winters Raye MorganTwins for the bachelorA Daddy for Her Sons by Raye Morgan When Connor McNair watched his best friend marry Jill Darling, he never expected a second chance with the girl who got away. Now she's the single mother of adorable twin babies, and he's back to persuade her to give up her pastry company. It's just business…until Jill's sweet smile has Connor thinking about fatherhood and forever. But that's against all the rules…Doorstep Twins by Rebecca Winters Gabi Turner is on the Greek island of Milos to find Andreas Simonides—the father of her late sister's baby twins. But Andreas knows who the real father is—his brother! Waiting for his brother, Andreas is soon changing diapers and singing nursery rhymes. He and Gabi make a good team. But what will keep them together when the real father arrives? Previously published as A Daddy for Her Sons and Doorstep Twins
The Bachelor's Bargain
by Jessica SteeleIt was Jarad Montgomery who picked Merren up and dusted her down after she'd been mugged. He even offered to replace her stolen money.Merren was determined to repay Jarad, and he was happy to suggest a solution: be his steady girlfriend for a year! At first, Merren reckoned she'd got the better part of their bargain-being escorted by Jarad was no hardship-until he decided that their deal included other duties as well!
The Bachelor's Bride
by Audra AdamsPregnant!Rachel Morgan was having a baby by a wealthy, powerful man-a man she couldn't even remember! She'd thought her shadowy interlude with a compelling stranger was nothing more than a dream, but now Rachel was facing the future with a baby-and a husband?Reid James hadn't forgotten Rachel. And when he learned what their shared passion had created, he knew he had to persuade this proud, down-on-her-luck lady to let him be a part of their child's life. Because if he didn't he'd be left with nothing but memories of that one incredible night-and to a man like Reid, that just wasn't enough!
The Bachelor's Christmas Bride (Northbridge Nuptials)
by Victoria PadeWhen Shannon Duffy came to Northbridge, Montana, to meet her newfound brother, she didn't expect to also find the man of her dreams-wearing a Santa suit no less! But though Dag McKendrick was irresistible, the newly disengaged Shannon had to at least try to resist him. She'd learned the dangers of falling fast....For Dag, courting Shannon was an obvious no-no-especially since the ex-pro hockey player had been burned in the romantic rink before. Would he cave in to the temptation of finding out if Shannon was naughty or nice-just in time for Christmas?
The Bachelor's Perfect Match: Anna's Forgotten Fiance The Bachelor's Perfect Match Reunited By A Secret Child (Castle Falls #3)
by Kathryn SpringerHe loves adventures…She only reads them…until now!Maddie Montgomery, Castle Falls’ shy librarian, has always played it safe. Enter Aiden Kane, the town’s resident adventurer, on the mend from an accident and in need of Maddie’s help. As Maddie assists Aiden with his search for a long-lost relative, the handsome outdoorsman coaxes Maddie out of her safety zone. But can Maddie take the biggest risk of all—giving in to love?
The Bachelor: An enthralling historical from the queen of sexy Regency romance! (Duke Dynasty #2)
by Sabrina JeffriesIf you love Julia Quinn's Bridgerton, you'll fall head over heels for the family at the heart of Sabrina Jeffries' Duke Dynasty series!'Anyone who loves romance must read Sabrina Jeffries!' Lisa Kleypas, New York Times bestselling authorFrom New York Times bestselling author, and Queen of the sexy Regency romance, Sabrina Jeffries comes a sparkling new series about an oft-widowed mother's grown children, who blaze through society in their quest for the truth about their fathers . . . and in the process find that love just might conquer all . . . For fans of Sarah MacLean, Julia Quinn and Tessa Dare.Lady Gwyn Drake has long protected her family's reputation by hiding an imprudent affair from her youth. But when her former suitor appears at Armitage Hall, manhandling the heiress and threatening to go public with her secrets, it's Gwyn who needs protecting. Her twin brother, Thorn, hires Joshua Wolfe, the estate's gamekeeper, to keep her safe in London during her debut. As a war hero, Joshua feels obligated to fulfill the assignment he has accepted. But as a man, it's torment to be so very close to the beauty he's fought to ignore . . .With handsome Joshua monitoring her every move, Gwyn would prefer to forget both the past and the parade of money-seeking bachelors at her coming out. But Joshua is unmoved by her attempts at flirtation, and the threat of blackmail still hangs over her. With danger closing in, Gwyn must decide which is the greater risk: deflecting a scoundrel's attempts to sabotage her - or revealing her whole heart to the rugged bodyguard she can't resist . . . For more dazzlingly romantic and witty historical romance, don't miss Sabrina's other gorgeous series including The Sinful Suitors, The Hellions of Halstead Hall, The School for Heiresses and The Royal Brotherhood.
The Back Wing
by Mike BefelerEven witches and werewolves need to retire sometime—but they can still get involved in the occasional murder mystery… Grieving widower Harold McCaffrey moves into the Mountain Splendor Retirement Home and finds himself living in the Back Wing with a group of strange residents—aging witches, vampires, werewolves and shape-shifters… He bonds with his fellow denizens, especially Bella, who has promise of becoming more than just a friend. Things are looking up for Harold—until he and Bella must use all their normal and extra-normal skills to solve two murders in this very unique retirement community. From an author twice nominated for the Lefty Award for Humorous Mystery whose work has been called &“delightful&” (Maggie Sefton, New York Times-bestselling author&” and &“very, very funny&” (Kirkus Reviews), this is a uniquely quirky paranormal mystery.
The Back to School collection: ALL TEACHERS GREAT AND SMALL, ALL TEACHERS WISE AND WONDERFUL, ALL TEACHERS BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL
by Andy SeedALL TEACHERS GREAT AND SMALL tells the true story of Andy's first year at Cragthwaite Primary School - how he bravely negotiated the vagaries of the local dialect, made disastrous bids to provide a family home, naively and hilariously tried out new-fangled ideas in a school stuck in a 1950s time warp, and ultimately discovered a little part of England he was proud to call home.Warm, touching and very funny, All Teachers Great and Small transports you to a time that may be gone but has never been forgotten.ALL TEACHERS WISE AND WONDERFUL: A year on from the end of ALL TEACHERS GREAT AND SMALL, Barbara and Andy Seed are settled into their Dales village, but at school trouble arrives for Andy in the form of nine-year-old Sheena. After two years in the job, Andy Seed returns to Cragthwaite brimming with confidence and looking forward to a year that is bound to bring its own rewards, as well as its share of mishaps and misadventures. But even he didn't anticipate exploding piggy banks, bottle-rocket missiles, and actually deafening Dracula. At home, Andy and Barbara are enjoying life with little Tom, and are expecting again. Meanwhile, a new friendship is formed with hill farmer Adam. Adam proves both an inspiration and a confidante for Andy, and through him he begins to see the light with troubled Sheena. The second in Andy's trilogy about life as a Yorkshire Dales teacher, this is as warm, witty and refreshing as the first, full of colourful anecdotes from village and school life.Andy Seed is beginning his fifth year teaching at Cragthwaite Primary in the Yorkshire Dales, and as always a new term is full of surprises.ALL TEACHERS BRIGHT AND BEAUTIFUL: These take the form of a beautiful, but not terribly bright, student on placement from the local teacher training college, and a particularly pushy and problematic parent with a fine line in complaining. It looks like Andy's pupils are the least of his problems...At home in Applesett, things aren't all rosy either. Barbara is forced to take a job as a postie to help pay the mortgage, which means finding someone to look after Tom and Reuben. When two old friends move into the village it looks like the problem has been solved, but it soon transpires that rural life is not for everyone.As always the book is peppered with the hilarious and heartwarming incidents that a life living and working with children inevitably contains.
The Back-to-School Fright from the Black Lagoon (Black Lagoon Adventures #13)
by Mike ThalerThese fun-filled chapter books mix school, monsters, and common kid problems with hilarious results. You'll scream with laughter!Summer vacation is over and that means one thing--back to school. For Hubie, getting ready to go back is worse than actually going to class. His mom picks out all the wrong clothes, he gets back-to-back shots from his doctor, and there are rumors of a new teacher worse than any other. Will Hubie fail before school even starts?
The Backstagers #1 (The Backstagers #1)
by James Tynion IVJames Tynion IV (Batman Eternal, The Woods) teams up with artist Rian Sygh (Munchkin, Stolen Forest) for an incredible yet earnest story about finding a place to fit in when you're kinda an outcast. When Jory transfers to the private, all-boys school St. Genesius, he figures joining the stage crew would involve a lot of just fetching props and getting splinters. To his pleasant surprise, he discovers there's a door backstage that leads to different worlds, and all of the stagehands know about it! All the world's a stage...but what happens behind the curtain is pure magic!
The Backstagers #2 (The Backstagers #2)
by James Tynion IVThe rest of the stage crew kids might be used to all the magical weirdness that goes on, but Jory is thrilled to discover more about the worlds backstage.
The Backstagers #3 (The Backstagers #3)
by James Tynion IVIt's Tech Rehearsal for Les Terribles and Beckett is determined to nail every cue, but Sasha's mistake brings new drama to the stage!
The Backstagers 2018 Halloween Intermission #1: Halloween Intermission (The Backstagers #1)
by James Tynion IVWith the days getting shorter and the nights getting SPOOKIER, the Backstagers are back for the Halloween season with all-new tales of terrors and creepy creatures. When Sasha accidentally falls asleep backstage, he ends up locked in the theater overnight! What lurks in the shadows, what terrors will he discover, and what the heck are the stage managers chanting? From writers James Tynion IV (Detective Comics, The Woods) and Sam Johns (The Backstagers: Valentines Intermission), and artist Rian Sygh (Adventure Time Fionna and Cake Card Wars, Regular Show), this haunted oversized one-act is a night at the theater you won’t want to miss! With back-up stories from artists Shan Murphy, Abby Howard, and Savanna Ganucheau this spine-tingling tale of the stage will leave you with goosebumps you can see from the back row!
The Backstagers 2018 Valentine's Day Special #1 (The Backstagers #1)
by James Tynion IVIt’s Valentine’s Day at St. Genesius Prep and the Backstagers are back in (stage) blacks for some ROMANTIC adventures in the mysterious world behind the scenes! Featuring bonus tales from a variety of special guests, including Brittney Williams, Caitlin Rose Boyle, and Katy Farina! It’s the “seasons of love” for your favorite backstage boys! (No, you can’t wear pink backstage. Or red. Or glitter. Or cherub wings, Sasha.)
The Backstagers Vol. 1 (The Backstagers #1)
by James Tynion IVJames Tynion IV (Detective Comics, The Woods) teams up with artist Rian Sygh (Munchkin, Stolen Forest) for an incredibly earnest story that explores what it means to find a place to fit in when you're kinda an outcast. When Jory transfers to an all-boys private high school, he's taken in by the lowly stage crew known as the Backstagers. Hunter, Aziz, Sasha, and Beckett become his new best friends and introduce him to an entire magical world that lives beyond the curtain that the rest of the school doesn't know about, filled with strange creatures, changing hallways, and a decades-old legend of a backstage crew that went missing and was never found. Collects the first four issues.
The Backstagers Vol. 2 (The Backstagers #2)
by James Tynion IVJames Tynion IV (Detective Comics, The Woods) teams up with artist Rian Sygh (Munchkin, Stolen Forest) for an incredibly earnest story that explores what it means to find a place to fit in when you're kinda an outcast. When Jory transfers to an all-boys private high school, he's taken in by the lowly stage crew known as the Backstagers. Hunter, Aziz, Sasha, and Beckett become his new best friends and introduce him to an entire magical world that lives beyond the curtain that the rest of the school doesn't know about, filled with strange creatures, changing hallways, and a decades-old legend of a backstage crew that went missing and was never found. Collects issues #5-8.
The Backstagers Vol. 3 (The Backstagers #3)
by James Tynion IVThe Backstagers are back in (stage) blacks, for a festive collection of Valentine’s Day and Halloween stories! Join Jory and the rest of the Backstagers as they wrestle with anti-Valentine crusades, totally creepy phantoms (NOT of the opera), and the everpresent magic of the backstage world in this romantically spooky third volume of the hit series. Reuniting the Prism Award-winning team of writer James Tynion IV (Detective Comics, Justice League) and artist Rian Sygh, along with a variety of fan-favorite artists including Brittney Williams (Goldie Vance), Caitlin Rose Boyle (Jonesy), Katy Farina (Steven Universe), and more, these holiday tales will fill your heart with love, spooky spectres, and chocolate. Lots...and lots...of chocolate.
The Backtrack
by Erin La RosaLife, rewound…Nearly twenty years ago, Sam Leto left her small hometown of Tybee Island, Georgia, to pursue her dreams of becoming a pilot. While she&’d prefer to keep flying away from her painful childhood memories, her beloved grandmother Pearl decides it&’s time to sell the family home. Reluctantly, Sam is summoned back to pack up the house.The 2000s nostalgia from Sam&’s old bedroom hits immediately: Fall Out Boy posters, drawers of roll-on body glitter and even her favorite CD player with a mixtape from her best friend, Damon Rocha. Damon was always a safe place and Sam often wonders what if her teenage self admitted her feelings for him back then…Mysteriously, the CD player still works all these years later. And somehow it has the power to show Sam an alternate version of her life.Song by song, Sam receives flashbacks from her past—senior prom, graduation, leaving home. But the memories aren&’t as she remembers them; they show what could have been. Suddenly, Sam knows exactly what would have happened if she&’d taken a chance with Damon—and she can&’t help feeling she made a terrible mistake leaving Tybee all those years ago."A perfectly in-tune love story that will be playing on repeat in my mind for a very long time." —Lauren Kung Jessen, author of Red String Theory and Lunar Love"La Rosa shines at genuinely funny and feminist romantic tales, and I'll read every single one of them." —Amy Spalding, bestselling author of For Her ConsiderationFOR FANS OF: Millennial nostalgia Magical realism Friends to lovers Dual timeline Second chances Found family Beachy small townDon't miss Erin La Rosa's next delightful rom-com, NOT YOU AGAIN, where a snarky screenwriter and a grumpy funeral director must must team up to escape a time loop—despite their mutual loathing and undeniable chemistry...
The Backup Plan: A Novel (The Sunrise Cove Series #3)
by Jill ShalvisNew York Times bestselling author Jill Shalvis returns to Sunrise Cove with a heartwarming tale of three people who are brought together when they’re bequeathed an old Wild West inn that has the potential to pull their lives apart, but instead turns into the gift of a lifetime.When Alice receives a call about an unexpected windfall, she’s stunned to learn the gift is a falling-apart-at-the-seams old Wild West B&B she once considered home—and she’s inherited it along with two strangers. Except they weren’t always strangers. Once upon a time, they were friends. One is her ex-BFF Lauren. The other is Knox, the only guy to ever break her heart, all while never even knowing she existed.It turns out their lives are unknowingly entangled because they once separately helped the same woman without expecting anything in return. Years later, Alice, Lauren, and Knox are broken in their own way, with their own history—and secrets— causing them to start out on the wrong foot with each other. But according to the will, they must renovate and be partners in the inn for one year or else lose their inheritance.Stuck together, they make a list of rules to keep the peace—rules that end up doing the opposite, but by some miracle they find what they didn’t even know they were looking for—acceptance, true friendship, and in a case (or two!), true love.
The Backup Plan: Fall in love with another one of Jill Shalvis's moving love stories! (Sunrise Cove)
by Jill ShalvisBeloved New York Times bestselling author Jill Shalvis returns to Sunrise Cove with a powerful, moving story.'Perfect, feel-good fiction' Sarah Morgan'Fall in love with Jill Shalvis! She's my go-to read for humor and heart' Susan Mallery, New York Times bestselling author.............................................Could an unexpected windfall be the gift of a lifetime? Alice never expected to inherit the falling-apart-at-the-seams old Wild West B&B she once considered home, nor did she expect that she'd have to share it with two strangers. Except they weren't always strangers. Once upon a time, they were friends. One is her ex-BFF Lauren. The other is Knox, the only guy to ever break her heart. Years ago, each of them independently helped the same woman, never expecting that it would link them together forever. And now Alice, Lauren, and Knox, all broken in their own ways, must find a way to get along with each other. According to the woman's will, they must renovate the inn as a team for one year, or else lose their inheritance. Stuck together, they make a list of rules to keep the peace. The rules may not be that effective, but if they can weather the storm, they might find something they didn't even know they were looking for - acceptance, real friendship, and maybe even true love..............................................Raves for Jill Shalvis's life-affirming novels:'Jill Shalvis's books are funny, warm, charming and unforgettable' RaeAnne Thayne'Sisterhood takes center stage in this utterly absorbing novel. Jill Shalvis balances her trademark sunny optimism and humor with unforgettable real-life drama. A book to savor - and share' Susan Wiggs'Readers will find it easy to root for Shalvis's stubborn, vulnerable heroines to recognize both the decency and compassion of the sexy men who love them and their own worthiness to be loved. This heartfelt tale is thoroughly satisfying' Publishers Weekly
The Backwards Alphabet Book: Laugh all the way from Z to A...
by Paul FriedrichAre you ready to start the alphabet? Good, let's go... Z is for Zebra. Wait, what?!When Apple is nowhere to be seen as the very important alphabet book begins, Zebra gets the call-up first. But Zebra's not ready - Z for Zebra never kicks off the alphabet!While the alphabet continues backwards, Zebra and his friend Yak make it their mission to find Apple and set things straight once and for all...Learn your ZYX's with this quirky, laugh-out-loud reinvention of the classic alphabet book - perfect for kids and adults alike. With bold, bright illustrations from graphic novelist, cartoonist, fine artist and graphic, designer Paul Friedrich.
The Bad Angel Brothers: A Novel
by Paul TherouxFrom the legendary American master Paul Theroux comes a brilliant new novel of chilling psychological depth, the tale of a younger brother whose lifelong rivalry with his older brother—a powerful lawyer with a pattern of gleefully vicious betrayals—culminates in the ultimate plan: murder.Cal has always lived in the shadow of his manipulative and domineering brother, Frank, who was doted upon by their mother and beloved by the girls in their small New England hometown—including Cal’s own girlfriends. In an attempt to escape Frank’s intrusive presence, Cal pursues a different kind of freedom in the world’s wild spaces, prospecting for gold and precious minerals everywhere from the heat of the desert at the Mexican border to the Alaskan chill, to central Africa, and Colombian mines where he will meet the love of his life, Vida. Soon he is dripping in wealth, his pockets full of gold nuggets and emeralds, but the money means far less to him than his independence. To Frank, however, “Cash is king.” As Cal’s success grows, so too does Frank’s power and his influence in Cal’s affairs, the devastating threat he creates at the center of his little brother’s life. And, ultimately, when Frank decides to commit the ultimate betrayal…Cal is left with only one, final solution.Few writers have as keen an eye for human nature as the inimitable Paul Theroux, and this riveting tale of adventure, betrayal, and the true cost of family bonds is an unmissable new work from one of America’s most distinguished and beloved novelists.