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Stuff Christians Like
by Jonathan AcuffSometimes, we fall in love on mission trips even though we know we’ll break up when we get back. Sometimes, you have to shot block a friend’s prayer because she’s asking God to bless an obviously bad dating relationship. Sometimes, you think, “I wish I had a t-shirt that said ‘I direct deposit my tithe’ so people wouldn’t judge me.” Sometimes, the stuff that comes with faith is funny. This is that stuff. Jonathan Acuff’s Stuff Christians Like Ebook is your field guide to all things Christian. You’ll learn the culinary magic of the crock-pot. Think you’ve got a Metro worship leader—use Acuff’s checklist. Want to avoid a prayer handholding faux pas? Acuff has you covered. Like a satirical grenade, Acuff brings us the humor and honesty that galvanized more than a million online readers from more than 200 countries in a new portable version. Welcome to the funny side of faith.
Stuff Every Bride Should Know (Stuff You Should Know #16)
by Michelle Park LazetteWedding planning doesn't have to be stressful! From budgeting to bachelorette parties to writing your own vows, this pocket-sized manual is packed with tips to plan, execute, and enjoy the perfect engagement and wedding. It's a personal wedding planner you can carry in your pocket . . . the perfect engagement present or planning handbook for any soon-to-be bride.From the Hardcover edition.
Stuff Every College Student Should Know
by Blair ThornburghFrom the best-selling series of how-to guides comes Stuff Every College Student Should Know, the ultimate reference for every part of campus life. Packed with tips, tricks, and handy lists, the book gives college kids the lowdown on everything from pulling all-nighters to navigating dorm room drama to actually doing their own laundry. Covering everything from move-in day to graduation, this pocket-size handbook is the perfect gift for high-school seniors . . . because textbooks can teach you only so much.
Stuff Every Dad Should Know (Stuff You Should Know #2)
by Brett CohenYou've Got Children. We've Got Answers. From changing diapers and burping babies to building sand castles and hosting a sleepover party, this book is loaded with Stuff Every Dad Should Know. Readers will discover: * How to Rid a Room of Monsters * How to Squelch a Temper Tantrum * How to Assign Chores * How to Discuss the Birds and the Bees * How to Save for College Plus family road-trip survival skills, advice for healthy nutrition, a guide to bonding with moody teenagers, and much, much more!
Stuff Every Groom Should Know (Stuff You Should Know #14)
by Eric San JuanAll the Skills You'll Need to Get from "Yes!" to "I Do"Including:* How to Budget for a Wedding* How to Choose the Best Best Man* How to Pick the Perfect Tux* How to Write Your Own Vows* How to Survive Your Bachelor PartyPlus tips on building a guest list, suggestions for stress-free receptions, tricks for melting cold feet, advice on dealing with your new in-laws, and much, much more!
Stuff Hipsters Hate: A Field Guide to the Passionate Opinions of the Indifferent
by Brenna Ehrlich Andrea BartzFrom the dive bars of Brooklyn's Williamsburg to the dirty alleys of San Francisco's Mission, the urban hipster has redefined American cool with a sighing disdain for everything mainstream. Hipsters are easily identified by their worn-out shoes, fixies and PBR tallboys, but until now no one had investigated beyond the hipster look to the even more hilarious hipster psyche. With personally researched articles, revealing illustrations and helpful charts and graphs, Stuff Hipsters Hate exposes the bottomless well of impassioned scorn that motivates the ever-apathetic hipster, including: MATING AND SOCIAL HATES *buying you a drink *monogamy *texting back in a timely fashion. APPAREL AND GROOMING HATES *high heels *muscles *being asked about their tattoos. WORK AND LIFE HATES *full-time jobs *knowing their bank balance *enthusiasm
Stuff Parisians Like
by Olivier MagnyIn the tradition of the New York Times bestseller Stuff White People Like, a tongue-in-cheek homage to Parisians. To be mistaken for a Parisian, readers must buy the newspaper Le Monde, fold it, and walk. Then sit at a café and make phone calls. Be sure to order San Pellegrino, not any other kind of fizzy water. They shouldn't be surprised when a waiter brings out two spoons after they order le moelleux au chocolat- it is understood that the dessert is too sinfully delicious not to share. Go to l'île Saint-Louis-all Parisians are irredeemably in love with that island. Feel free to boldly cross the street whenever the impulse strikes-pedestrian crosswalks are too dangerous. If they take a cruise on the Seine, they will want to stand outside, preferably with their collar popped up. If they want to decorate, may we suggest the photographs of Robert Doisneau? To truly be cool in Paris, own an iPhone, wear Converse sneakers, and order sushi. And as they stroll through the Luxembourg Gardens, remember-they can't go wrong wearing black.
Stuff That Makes a Gay Heart Weep: A Definitive Guide to the Loud & Proud Dislikes of Millions
by Freeman HallThere's nothing they hate more than bad home décor, cheap vodka, and men who take off their shirts but shouldn't (especially when those things happen all at once!). They believe they're unique, yet somehow they're all exactly the same, bitching about Prop 8 and lamenting the sad fact that Bradley Cooper is straight. A day without Bravo TV, disco music, frantic texting, and just the right designer clothes makes them want to off themselves.Well, it's not quite that extreme, but it's definitely Stuff that Makes a Gay Heart Weep.In this laugh-out-loud guide to the dislikes of millions, the author shows in 150 succinct entries that it's just not fair for Caucasians to have all the fun! You are invited to kick back, pour yourself a Ketel One on the rocks, and get lost in the bitchiest bitch-fest west of the West Village and this side of the Castro.
Stuff White People Like
by Christian LanderWhite people love nothing better than sipping free-trade gourmet coffee, leafing through the SundayNew York Times, and listening to David Sedaris on NPR (ideally all at the same time). TheStuff White People Like 2010 Day-to-Day Calendarinvestigates, explains, and offers advice for finding social success with white people, all in a tongue-in-cheek manner. Whether explaining their obsession with snowboarding or why kitchen gadgets make them weak in the knees, this calendar has all the white stuff.
Stuff White People Like: The Definitive Guide to the Unique Taste of Millions
by Christian LanderThey believe they're unique, yet somehow they're all exactly the same. You know who they are: They're white people. And they're here and you're gonna have to deal. Fortunately, here's a book that investigates, explains, and offers advice for finding social success with the Caucasian persuasion. So kick back on your IKEA couch and lose yourself in the ultimate guide to the unbearable whiteness of being.
Stuff You Should Know About Stuff: How to Properly Behave in Certain Situations
by Tyler Stanton Tripp CrosbyDo you know how to properly conduct yourself in a public restroom?What about while in the midst of a profoundly awkward silence?Have you perfected how to get out of helping your friend move?If you answered no to those questions, fear not. You need Stuff You Should Know About Stuff, the book that future anthropologists will no doubt call "the Rosetta Stone of handling trivial life situations."From the sketch comedy duo who created the viral videos "Sh*t Nobody Says" and "Things You Can't Do When You're Not in a Pool," Tripp and Tyler bring you the written word in Stuff You Should Know About Stuff, a guide instructing you how to navigate the treacherous waters of life's odd quandaries.There are even photos and illustrations for people who enjoy photos and illustrations and stuff like that. You can read it from cover to cover or you can choose to educate yourself only in conjunction with your bowel movements. Totally your call there.Stuff You Should Know About Stuff places the priority on the trivial experiences of life, because that's where we spend most of our time; trying to recover from going for the fist bump when a casual acquaintance wanted a high five.
Stuntboy, In-Between Time (Stuntboy #2)
by Jason Reynolds Raúl The ThirdFrom Newbery Medal honoree and #1 New York Times bestselling author Jason Reynolds comes the sequel to the hilarious, hopeful, and action-packed middle grade novel Stuntboy, in the Meantime about the greatest young superhero you’ve never heard of, jam-packed with illustrations by Raúl the Third! <p><p> Portico Reeves A.K.A. superhero Stuntboy is back in Stuntboy, In-Between Time. Navigating your parents divorce and all the changes that come with it is no easy task, even for superheroes. But luckily Stuntboy has his friends to lean on in this sweet illustrated tale. <p><p> Portico Reeves is the greatest superhero a lot of people have never heard of. He likes it that way—then no one can get in the way of him from keeping other other people safe. Super safe. He’s Stuntboy. He’s got the moves. And the saves. Except. There’s been one major fail. <p><p> He couldn’t save his parents from becoming Xs. Which is a word that sounds like coughing up a hairball. But don’t talk to him about the divorce, because of the hairball thing, and also, it gives Portico the frets. <p><p> What’s also giving him frets is his parents living on two separate floors in their apartment building. He’s never fully with one parent or the other. He’s in-between, all the time. The in-between time. And the elevator is busted, so to get between floors means getting past the bullies who hang in the stairwells. <p><p> So when Portico and new friend, Herbert, and best best friend, Zola, discover an empty apartment, unlocked, they are psyched. It’s a perfect hideout, and hangout, and it’s not half anyone’s...it’s all theirs. So they decide to make it their own...let’s say with stunts of the drawing kind. Problem is, that gives some Grown Up People the frets, which leads to double frets for Portico. And he’s not sure his arsenal of stunts can combat that. <p> <b>New York Times Bestseller</b>
Stuntboy, in the Meantime (Stuntboy #1)
by Jason ReynoldsFrom Newbery Medal honoree and #1 New York Times bestselling author Jason Reynolds comes a hilarious, hopeful, and action-packed middle grade novel about the greatest young superhero you’ve never heard of, filled with illustrations by Raúl the Third! <p><p> Portico Reeves’s superpower is making sure all the other superheroes—like his parents and two best friends—stay super. And safe. Super safe. And he does this all in secret. No one in his civilian life knows he’s actually…Stuntboy! But his regular Portico identity is pretty cool, too. <p><p> He lives in the biggest house on the block, maybe in the whole city, which basically makes it a castle. His mom calls where they live an apartment building. But a building with fifty doors just in the hallways is definitely a castle. And behind those fifty doors live a bunch of different people who Stuntboy saves all the time. In fact, he’s the only reason the cat, New Name Every Day, has nine lives. <p><p> All this is swell except for Portico’s other secret, his not-so-super secret. His parents are fighting all the time. They’re trying to hide it by repeatedly telling Portico to go check on a neighbor “in the meantime.” But Portico knows “meantime” means his parents are heading into the Mean Time which means they’re about to get into it, and well, Portico’s superhero responsibility is to save them, too—as soon as he figures out how. <p><p> Only, all these secrets give Portico the worry wiggles, the frets, which his mom calls anxiety. Plus, like all superheroes, Portico has an arch-nemesis who is determined to prove that there is nothing super about Portico at all. <P><P><b>A New York Times Best Seller</b>
The Stupendous Dodgeball Fiasco
by Janice Repka Glin DibleyIt's circus boy vs. a dodgeball-crazy town in this wacky middle-grade story! Phillip might be the only kid in the world who wants to run away from the circus. With a clown for a dad and a Fat Lady for a mom, all Phillip wants is to be a normal kid. He finally convinces his parents to let him live with his aunt and uncle in a seemingly normal town. But Hardingtown is far from normal--it's the unofficial Dodgeball Capital of the World and everyone is completely obsessed. Soon Phillip is ducking screamers and dodging the dodgeball bully. But after a particularly vicious game, Phillip takes the bully to court to pay for his busted glasses--and ends up battling the whole dodgeball-crazed town!
The Stupendous Switcheroo: New Powers Every 24 Hours (The Stupendous Switcheroo #1)
by Mary Winn Heider Chad SellWhat would happen if you woke up every single day with a different, surprise SUPERPOWER?! Find out in this zany, hilarious illustrated novel from Mary Winn Heider and Chad Sell.The morning of his mom's business trip, Switcheroo wakes up to discover he has telekinesis. Which is super convenient when he has to give his babysitter-robot the slip to fight crime all day. But it's less convenient when he's recruited to fight crime again the next day, only to realize he can no longer move objects with his mind. Instead, he can talk to cats! Fun, but not nearly as useful. A new superpower every day should be exciting, right? What could possibly go wrong?
The Stupendous Switcheroo #2: Born to Be Bad (The Stupendous Switcheroo #2)
by Mary Winn Heider Chad SellSwitch and his heroic crew of rag-tag, superpowered kids are back! And this highly illustrated sequel has one mission: Operation Jailbreak (to Rescue the Parents who were Wrongfully Jailed by a Hero who Might Actually Turn Out to be the Real Villain?!)The Stupendous Switcheroo—Switch for short—used to idolize legendary superhero Vik Valor. He wanted to be just like him: a hero. But now that he has finally gotten used to waking up with new powers every day, Switch isn&’t so sure that Mr. Valor is one of the good guys. How could he be, if he put all of Switch's new friends&’ parents (who happen to be famous supervillains) in jail?Switch is left with only one course of action: Operation Jailbreak. Switch will have to get their families back, if he ever wants to find out the truth about Vik Valor—and himself. What else can you do if the good guys aren't really good? And if your parents are villains, were you born to be bad?
Stupid American History: Tales of Stupidity, Strangeness, and Mythconceptions (Stupid History #3)
by Leland GregoryAmerica is the home of the brave and, apparently, the stupid and gullible. Satirist Leland Gregory teaches us a lesson in historical hilarity with Stupid American History.From Columbus to George W. Bush (that's a lot of material, people), Leland leads us through American history's mythconceptions, exposing idiocy and inanity along the time line. He reeducates by informing us about myths. For example, Samuel Prescott actually was the guy to alert us that the British were coming and not that Paul Revere dude.Move over Colbert and Stewart; satire has finally found its rightful place in American history.Excerpt from the book:"John Tyler was on his knees playing marbles when he was informed that Benjamin Harrison had died and he was now president of the United States. At that time marbles was a very popular game for both children and grown-ups."For reasons still unknown, Texas congressman Thomas Lindsay Blanton, a Presbyterian Sunday school teacher and prohibitionist, inserted dirty words into the Congressional Record in 1921. His colleagues overwhelmingly censured him on October 24, 1921, by a vote of 293-0."
Stupid Ancient History (Stupid History #14)
by Leland GregoryWeird, wild, and little-known facts about long-lost empires from the New York Times-bestselling author . . . To fight off Roman ships in 300 BC, Carthaginians catapulted live snakes at them The Athenian lawmaker Draco died of suffocation when gifts of cloaks were showered upon him by grateful citizens at an Aegina theater in 620 BC A dead man won an early Olympic event Nero not only didn&’t play a musical instrument while Rome burned, he actually tried to help—but he did scapegoat Christians afterward and subject them to terrible fates Silly, shocking, weird, hilariously funny—and outrageously true—the anecdotes in Stupid Ancient History chronicle Greek philosophers, Roman conquerors, Egyptian mummies, and much more—revealing little-known oddities and busting historic mythconceptions. Discover Biblical misattributions; the nine-year-old girl who spotted a bogus ancient relic in a British museum; the person Caesar salad was actually named after (not Julius)—and much more!
Stupid California: Idiots in the Golden State (Stupid History #5)
by Leland GregoryBest-selling author Leland Gregory--who has so entertainingly highlighted humanity's stupidity in the areas of crime, business, love, politics, cruelty, and history--is back with Stupid California.This time, Gregory builds a case for the common suspicion that Californians, from movie moguls to beach bums, have a special affinity for idiocy. Culled from print, online, and broadcast sources, Stupid California is a hilarious collection of true stories, trivia, and factoids about the Golden State, such as: * "California's state animal is the California grizzly bear, which is also on the state flag. The bear was honored in 1953, a full 31 years after the last known bear in the state was killed."* "During the 1980s, in a bold stroke against terrorism, the Chico City Council banned nuclear weapons, enacting a mandatory $500 fine for anyone detonating a nuclear weapon within city limits."Silly, shocking, weird, and amusing, Stupid California is ideal for both kinds of people--those who love California and those who hate it.
Stupid Conservatives: Weird and Wacky Tales from the Right Wing (Stupid History #12)
by Leland GregoryLeland Gregory's 17 previous humor collections with AMP are all in print and all are staples on the humor backlist, including Stupid American History, which was a New York Times best-seller, and Stupid History, which has shipped over 130,000 copies. Silly, shocking, weird, and hilariously funny, the one- or two-paragraph anecdotes that comprise Gregory's new anthology of stupid things said and done by American conservatives--politicians, citizens, journalists, professionals, workers, anyone who stands to the right of center--are culled from print, online, and broadcast media from all over the world. Here's a sample: * "When I see a 9/11 victim family on television, or whatever, I'm just like, 'Oh shut up.' I'm so sick of them because they're always complaining." --Glenn Beck, September 9, 2005
Stupid Cupid
by Rhonda StapletonFelicity's no ordinary teen matchmaker...she's a cupid!Felicity Walker believes in true love. That's why she applies for a gig at the matchmaking company Cupid's Hollow. But when Felicity gets the job, she learns that she isn't just a matchmaker...she's a cupid! (There's more than one of them, you know.) Armed with a hot pink, tricked-out PDA infused with the latest in cupid magic (love arrows shot through email), Felicity works to meet her quota of successful matches. But when she bends the rules of cupidity by matching her best friend Maya with three different boys at once, disaster strikes. Felicity needs to come up with a plan to set it all right, pronto, before she gets fired ¦and before Maya ends up with her heart split in three.
Stupid History: Tales of Stupidity, Strangeness, and Mythconceptions Through the Ages (Stupid History Ser. #2)
by Leland GregoryWhy exactly is Paul Revere revered? Was the lightbulb really Thomas Edison's bright idea?* Best-selling author Leland Gregory employs his masterful wit to expose historical myths, faux "facts," strange events, and tales of human stupidity throughout history.If it would shock you to learn that Benjamin Franklin didn't discover electricity, you'll appreciate this take on hundreds of historical legends and debacles. Historians and humorists alike may be surprised to learn that:* Samuel Prescott made the famous horseback ride into Concord, not Paul Revere.* As a member of Parliament, Isaac Newton spoke only once. He asked for an open window.* On April 24, 1898, Spain declared war on the U.S., thus starting the Spanish-American War. The U.S. declared war the very next day, but not wanting to be outdone, had the date on the declaration changed from April 25 to April 21.With these and many other stories, leading humorist Leland Gregory once again highlights both the strange and the funny side of humankind.
Stupid Liberals: Weird and Wacky Tales from the Left Wing (Stupid History #13)
by Leland GregoryLeland Gregory's 17 previous humor collections with AMP are all in print and all are staples on the humor backlist, including Stupid American History, which was a New York Times best-seller, and Stupid History, which has shipped over 130,000 copies. Silly, shocking, weird, and hilariously funny, the one- or two-paragraph anecdotes that comprise Gregory's new anthology of stupid things said and done by American liberals--politicians, citizens, journalists, professionals, workers, anyone who stands to the left of center--are culled from print, online, and broadcast media from all over the world. Here's a sample: * Residents of Longmont, Colorado, voted to abolish all "Dead End" signs and replace them with "No Outlet" signs. The local citizenry felt the "Dead End" signs were too unpleasant.
Stupid Movie Lines: The 776 Dumbest Things Ever Uttered on the Silver Screen
by Ross Petras Kathryn PetrasThe creme de la crud of screen history "War! War! That's all you think of, Dick Plantagenet! You burner! You pillager!" --Virginia Mayo as Lady Edith to George Sanders in King Richard and the Crusaders (1954) "Visits? That would indicate visitors. " --Army captain learning of alien visits in Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959) "When I'm sitting here with you, I don't even think about the slime people. " --Hero to heroine in The Slime People (1962) "Suck the coffin mushroom now. " --The Ultimate Vampire (1991) "This is bad. " --Leonardo DiCaprio as the you-know-what hits the you-know-what in Titanic (1997)
Stupid on the Road: Idiots on Planes, Trains, Buses, and Cars (Stupid History #7)
by Leland GregoryStupid on the Road: Idiots on Planes, Trains, Buses, and Cars, the compilation of human stupidity from New York Times best-selling author Leland Gregory, is a riotous collection of the unbelievably bizarre events and behavior that result when people strap themselves in behind the wheel.This time, Leland--who so entertainingly highlighted humanity's stupidity in the areas of crime, business, love, politics, cruelty, and history--turns his attention to idiots on the road and in the air.For instance, here are actual statements given by insurance policyholders describing their automobile accidents:"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.""The guy was all over the place. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."These true stories, from the strange to the outrageous to the just-plain dumb, will have you shaking your head at the wacky misadventures that have occurred as people attempt to get from point A to point B.