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The Famously Funny Parrott: More Bird-Brained Than Ever! (THE FAMOUSLY FUNNY PARROTT)
by Eric Daniel WeinerFrom the co-creator of the hit children&’s show, Dora the Explorer, comes four more hilarious stories about the friendship between Freddie the purple parrot and his loyal butler, Peccary.Return to Rubberwick with this new collection of short stories, full of whimsical illustrations and laugh-out-loud hijinks!These brand new adventures find our favorite duo deciphering morse code, getting into trouble with the town Judge, and even trying a new breakfast treat (don't worry, waffles are still the best!). When things get tough Freddie Parrott knows that he can always count on his loyal butler and best friend, Peccary.&“The Wind in the Willows meets Wodehouse&’s Jeeves and Wooster in these short stories.&”–Kirkus Reviews on The Famously Funny Parrott
The Fandom (Chicken House Novels Ser. #1)
by Anna DayA compulsively readable and clever YA mix of fantasy and contemporary, it’s Inkheart meets Kill the Boy Band, for fans of Patrick Ness and Rainbow Rowell!Violet is in her element. Cosplay at the ready, she can’t wait to feel part of her favorite fandom: The Gallows Dance, a mega book and movie franchise that she and her friends know EVERY WORD of (canon and fanfic included). But at Comic Con, a freak accident transports Violet and her friends into the story for real. And in just the first five minutes, they cause the death of the heroine, and get taken prisoner by the rebel group she was supposed to lead to victory. It’s up to Violet to take her place, and play out the plot the way it was written. But stories have a life of their own, and when you change the script in one place, the rest gets revised too . . .“An absolute thrill to read. Turning so many conventions on their head, Day gives us a story that can make you rethink the world, make you laugh, and make you bite your fingernails off, all while falling in love with her characters. Highly recommended!” —James Dashner, #1 New York Times–bestselling author of The Maze Runner“A glorious epic to fan culture . . . for fans of Fangirl and Caraval.” —BuzzFeed“Day’s debut novel blends the joy of falling in love and the stark terror of actually becoming part of a fictional world, with no idea how to return home.” —Publishers Weekly
The Fangirl's Guide to the Galaxy: A Handbook for Geek Girls
by Sam MaggsFanfic, cosplay, cons, books, memes, podcasts, vlogs, OTPs and RPGs and MMOs and more--it's never been a better time to be a girl geek. <P><P>The Fangirl's Guide to the Galaxy is the ultimate handbook for ladies living the nerdy life, a fun and feminist take on the often male-dominated world of geekdom. <P><P>With delightful illustrations and an unabashed love for all the in(ternet)s and outs of geek culture, this book is packed with tips, playthroughs, and cheat codes, including: <br>* How to make nerdy friends <br>* How to rock awesome cosplay <br>* How to write fanfic with feels <br>* How to defeat Internet trolls <br>* How to attend your first conAnd more! <P><P>Plus, insightful interviews with fangirl faves, like Jane Espenson, Erin Morgenstern, Kate Beaton, Ashley Eckstein, Laura Vandervoort, Beth Revis, Kate Leth, and many others.
The Fantastic Family Whipple
by Matthew WardFor every child who's ever dreamed of being in the Guinness Book of World Records comes the story of eleven-year-old Arthur Whipple and his fantastic family of world record breakers . . . - Most Crème Brulée Eaten in One Minute - Highest Number of Matching Outfits Worn by a Stuffed Toy and Its Owner - Youngest Person to Summit the Third-Highest Mountain in the World These are just three of the 49,521 records won by Arthur's twelve brothers and sisters. Unfortunately, unlike his siblings, Arthur hasn't broken a single, solitary world record! But when the Whipples suffer a spate of catastrophes and a curious amount of attention from a pair of irregularly sized and unusually menacing clowns, Arthur might be the only one who can save his family from losing their collective crown . . . or worse. A 2013 BOOK EXPO AMERICA (BEA) BUZZ PANEL SELECTION!
The Fantastic and Terrible Fame of Classroom 13 (Classroom 13 #3)
by Joelle Dreidemy Honest Lee Matthew J. GilbertFor fans of Captain Underpants or Sideways Stories from Wayside School, this new chapter book series is perfect for reluctant readers.When famous agent Lucy LaRoux drops by Classroom 13, she makes an offer no one can refuse--she makes all of the students FAMOUS. You might think this was sweet, but it was not. It was selfish. (Lucy wants their money.) With great fame comes frightening stage fright, broken bones, rotten reality television, and other awful accidents. As the students of Classroom 13 are about to learn, being famous (or infamous) isn't always fun. What do YOU want to be famous for? The final chapter of each book encourages young readers to write their OWN chapter and send it in to the author, Honest Lee. The Fantastic and Terrible Fame of Classroom 13 is the third title in a new chapter book series of hilarious stories about a very unlucky classroom. Each story is full of humor, action, and fun that will prompt hours of conversation among friends, families, and classrooms.(Psst! Hey you. Yeah, YOU! Just between us, this book also has a secret code hidden in every book that kids will have to figure out to read a chapter. Kids'll love it!) ©2017 by Hachette Book Group, Inc.
The Farm That Mac Built
by Tammi SauerThe scarecrow from Old Mac Donald&’s farm emcees a barnyard theater production that collapses into hilarious chaos in this rollicking rendition of &“The House That Jack Built.&” It&’s showtime on Old Mac Donald&’s Farm! The barnyard animals are putting on a play—a farm version of "The House That Jack Built"— but other animals keep taking the stage and interrupting the production. First some rambunctious monkeys, then breakdancing kangaroos . . . there&’s even a pair of singing elephants. Everyone knows that monkeys, kangaroos, and elephants do NOT belong on a farm . . . so what to do? Bursting with sound effects and rollicking repetition that will have kids clamoring for repeat readings, this hilarious mashup of two favorite nursery rhymes shows that perseverance and teamwork pay off, and that sometimes you just have to roll with the unexpected and try to have fun with it.
The Fart Book: The Disgusting Adventures of Milo Snotrocket
by J. B. O'NeilWhether you're a "professional" butt-whistler . . . or simply can't resist impressing your friends every now and then with a face-melting fart . . . you'll laugh out loud at this hilarious book with dozens of amazing illustrations.Learn from the master of bottom-burping disaster himself, Milo Snotrocket, as he demonstrates all twenty-seven different kinds of farts (and the perfect situations to use them to your stinky advantage). The Fart Book, in all of its gaseous glory, illustrates countless fart types and appropriate-use scenarios, including these:•The Scream •The Sputter•The Rotten Egg Cloud•The Cough Cover-Up•The Sonic Boom
The Fashion Committee
by Susan JubyProject Runway meets I'll Give You the Sun in a hilarious and surprising he-said, she-said story about a fashion competition that will change both of their lives, from acclaimed author, Susan Juby.Charlie Dean is a style-obsessed girl who eats, sleeps, and breathes fashion. John Thomas-Smith is a boy who forges metal sculptures in his garage and couldn't care less about clothes. But they share one thing in common: both are gunning for a scholarship to the private art high school that could make all their dreams come true. And whoever wins the fashion competition will win the scholarship. Told in the alternating voices of Charlie's and John's fashion journals which they're required to keep for the contest, this hilarious and poignant tale perfectly captures what it's like to have an artistic passion so fierce that nothing--not your dad's girlfriend's drug-addicted ex-boyfriend, a soul-crushing job at Salad Stop, or being charged with a teensy bit of kidnapping--can stand in your way.
The Fashion Committee
by Susan Juby"The Fashion Committee is another winner by one of my all time favorite authors."--Meg Cabot, New York Times bestselling author of the The Princess Diaries and Mediator series Charlie Dean is a style-obsessed girl who eats, sleeps, and breathes fashion. John Thomas-Smith is a boy who forges metal sculptures in his garage and couldn’t care less about clothes. Both are gunning for a scholarship to the private art high school that could make all their dreams come true. Whoever wins the fashion competition will win the scholarship—and only one can win. Told in the alternating voices of Charlie’s and John’s journals, this hilarious and poignant YA novel perfectly captures what it’s like to have an artistic drive so fierce that nothing—not your dad’s girlfriend’s drug-addicted ex-boyfriend, a soul-crushing job at Salad Stop, or being charged with a teensy bit of kidnapping—can stand in your way. With black and white art custom-created by fashion and beauty illustrator Soleil Ignacio, the book is a collector’s item, perfect for anyone with a passion for fashion.
The Fast and the Frozen (Geronimo Stilton Cavemice #4)
by Geronimo StiltonGeronimo Stilton's ancient ancestor Geronimo Stiltonoot is back in another prehistoric adventure! A visiting rodent has arrived in Old Mouse City with astounding news. On his recent journey to a distant land, he spotted a mountain . . . moving! Holey cheese! Geronimo Stiltonoot is determined to travel to the ice and snow himself to find out what lies behind this mystery. It's a fur-raising expedition!
The Fast and the Frozen (Geronimo Stilton Cavemice #4)
by Geronimo StiltonIn this fun spin-off to the bestselling middle grade adventure series, the prehistoric ancestor to Geronimo Stilton investigates a Stone Age mystery.Geronimo Stilton’s ancient ancestor Geronimo Stiltonoot is back in another prehistoric adventure!A visiting rodent has arrived in Old Mouse City with astounding news. On his recent journey to a cold, distant land, he spotted a mountain . . . moving! Holey cheese! Geronimo Stiltonoot sets off on a trip to the ice and snow to find out what lies behind this mystery. It’s a fur-raising expedition!Praise for the Geronimo Stilton’s Cavemice series:“Fans of the other Geronimo Stilton books will definitely embrace the over-the-top silliness in this new spin-off.” —BooklistPraise for Geronimo Stilton’s books:“Lightning pace and full-color design will hook kids in a flash.” —Publishers Weekly
The Fastest Way to Fall: the perfect feel-good romantic comedy for 2021
by Denise Williams'The perfect feel-good read' Emily Henry, New York Times bestselling authorTrue love never did run smooth . . .Britta is excited for the chance to finally prove herself at work when she's asked to write about a hot new body-positive fitness app that includes personal training.When her training sessions with Wes begin, the pair click immediately. He may be the app's CEO but despite his professional success, his personal life is in disarray and he's enjoying his return to what he really loves - coaching.As the weeks pass, Britta can't believe how much she's enjoying trying new things and finding her strength . . . and perhaps her perfect match?The longer she spends with Wes the harder it is to deny their chemistry and maintain a professional distance. Walking away from each other may be the smart choice. but for Wes and Britta, falling never felt so good . . .Praise for Denise Williams'Funny, flirtatious, and full of heart, The Fastest Way to Fall is an absolute winner!' Libby Hubscher'An addictive romance filled with hilarious banter, sharp and engaging dialogue, heartfelt moments, and a real and empowering heroine worth cheering for' Jane Igharo, author of Ties That Tether'Absolutely SPECTACULAR!!' Priscilla Oliveras, USA Today bestselling author'A charming, romantic love story' Andie J. Christopher, USA Today bestselling author'A powerhouse romance . . . funny and charming and steamy' Sarah Smith, author of Faker'Funny, sexy, heartwarming and emotional . . . I did not want to put it down!' Samantha Young, New York Times bestselling author'Jake is just the type of hero I love - sexy, smart, sweet, and smitten' Olivia Dade, author of Spoiler Alert'Charming and compelling . . . as moving as it romantic' Jen DeLuca, author of Well Matched
The Fat Cat Sat on the Mat (I Can Read Level 1)
by Nurit KarlinThis funny rhyming story starring a big orange tabby cat helps kids learn to read! Fat Cat Sat on the Mat is a proven winner—welcome at home or in the classroom—as it makes kids laugh.The fat cat sat on the mat. "Get off!" said the rat. But the fat cat just sat. Will the rat get the fat cat off the mat? Enjoy reading this silly story aloud for maximum effect!Find out if rat can get cat off the mat in this funny, phonetic Level One I Can Read that's perfect for kids learning to sound out words and sentences. With repeating sounds and words, beginning readers will grow their reading confidence as they laugh about the cat and the rat and their sibling-style squabble.
The Fat Ladies Club: The Indispensable 'Real World' Guide to Pregnancy
by Andrea Bettridge Hilary Gardener Lyndsey Lawrence Sarah Groves Annette JonesTHE FAT LADIES CLUB met at antenatal classes and became firm friends. This book is the result of their shared experiences of first-time pregnancy. Nothing is left out, so be prepared to read about their emotions, hormones and bodily changes - some humorous, some horrendous - as the ladies get ready for motherhood. Forget the textbook theory and settle down for what amounts to an eavesdrop into their girly chats. Did they get stretch marks - how many, where and what were they like? What happened to their sex lives? Did 'it' feel the same afterwards? When did they first feel like a mum? Other books give you the factual stuff but this alternative guide to the real ins and outs of pregnancy gives advice which all women will learn from.
The Fat Ladies Club: The Indispensable 'real World' Guide To Pregnancy
by Andrea Bettridge Hilary Gardener Lyndsey Lawrence Sarah GrovesFollowing up from the huge success of their first book, The Fat Ladies Club now write about their experiences as mums of under 5's. In their refreshingly open and intimate style, they talk about all the issues that every new mum faces ...How do you deal with a toddler who will only eat chocolate? How do you juggle a second and third child into your hectic life? What do you do when your potty trained child does a wee on a fake tree in a restaurant? Will you ever get a full night's sleep again, without the entire family ending up in one bed? What happens to your sex and social lives? And how on earth will you cope when you eventually have to wave goodbye to your child on their first day of school?
The Fat Princess
by Susan Ouriou Mario GirardA hilarious fairytale for adults facing a complicated world.
The Fat Woman's Joke: A Novel
by Fay WeldonBestselling author Fay Weldon delivers a scathing satire about society&’s obsession with female weight and beauty in the 1960s, as relevant today as when it was first publishedAfter a lifetime of gorging herself, Esther Wells has an epiphany: She and her husband, Alan, are going on a diet. Dedicated foodies throughout their marriage, they are about to discover what happens when new passions supplant old. Deprived of the meals he loves, Alan, an advertising man by trade and a novelist by avocation, promptly begins an affair with his secretary, Susan. But his fantasies are all about food. With her marriage to Alan in jeopardy, Esther moves out and commits a betrayal of her own. Narrated by Esther through a series of flashbacks, The Fat Woman&’s Joke is a novel about sex, food, marriage, and the indignities of the 1960s. Infused with Fay Weldon&’s trenchant wit and illuminating observations, it&’s a satisfying, deeply felt tale of one woman&’s revenge upon the world that has oppressed her.
The Fatal Eggs
by Mikhail Afanasevich Bulgakov Hugh AplinAn inspired work of science fiction and a biting political allegory, Bulgakov's "The Fatal Eggs" tells of a brilliant scientist whose experiments with life spiral terribly--and fatefully--out of control.
The Fatal Eggs (Modern Voices Ser.)
by Mikhail BulgakovThe chickens come home to roost in this &“brilliantly strange&” blend of science fiction and political satire by the author of The Master and Margarita (The Guardian, UK). As the new reality of post-Revolution Soviet life begins to settle in, a gifted but eccentric zoologist named Persikov invents a machine that revolutionizes the growth of living organisms by drastically increasing their size and reproductive rates. Meanwhile, a mysterious plague has wiped out the entire poultry population of Russia, raising concerns about the government&’s ability to feed its people. Hoping to use Persikov&’s yet-untested invention to revive the decimated chicken population, the secret service confiscates Persikov&’s machine—with disastrous results… Inspired by H. G. Wells&’s novel The Food of the Gods and How It Came to Earth, this science fiction novella delighted readers in 1925 Russia—and also disapproved of by certain critics who saw the tale as an anti-Soviet satire of the events of the Russian Revolution of 1917 and of post-war leadership.
The Fate of Others: Stories
by Richard BauschA new collection of short stories examining the extraordinary shades of ordinary life, from the prize-winning fiction writer Richard Bausch (&“A master of the short story" —The New York Times Book Review)In these twelve new stories, Richard Bausch explores the passions of men and women facing unexpected circumstances and the complications of modern life and love. In the novella &“Donnaiolo,&” for instance, the parents of a young divorcée who has returned from Italy and a failed marriage must deal with the completely different, and unappealing, person she has become. In &“Isolation,&” a happily married woman who has conceived an unexpected passion for another man learns, in lockdown during the pandemic, that this man—into whose life Bausch also gives us a window—has become ill with Covid. In a second novella, &“Broken House,&” an elderly Catholic man recalls his part in the destruction of an old farmhouse by altar boys who believed a monk had given them permission to destroy it—while also portraying his lifelong fascination with one of the boys, a gifted artist who has carried a secret for decades about the church they both wanted to serve as priests. And in still another story, &“The Widow&’s Tale,&” a woman whose recently killed husband repeatedly visits her younger sister in dreams attends a séance.Throughout The Fate of Others, Bausch once again exposes the virtues and flaws of his characters, reminding us, as the best stories do, of ourselves and people we know, and the lives we lead.
The Father of All Dad Guides: From (A)doring to (Z)addy
by Madeleine DaviesA humorous gift book that introduces the different species of American fathers, from A to ZOf all the mammalian species of North America, few are as paradoxically mysterious and demanding of attention as the human father of the United States. Quiet yet steady in his affection and deafeningly loud when he’s mad, the American dad—as much as we love him—is a particularly exciting study, which is why we’ve created this guide as an aid for readers to identify themselves (if you happen to be a dad), their dads (if you happen to have a dad), dads on television (often a stand-in when your dad’s not around), and dads in the wild.In The Father of All Dad Guides: From A(doring) to Z(addy), you will learn how to identify fathers through:· Their markings. Some dads have mustaches. Others do not!· Dad calls. These include: “I’ll turn this car around right now” and “Can’t you ask your mom about that?”· Migration patterns. Why does Dad consistently ignore directions when he clearly doesn’t know where he is going?· Hibernation. Dads are tired all the time. · Defining characteristics. All dads are different, but they typically fall into at least one of the categories we’ve collected here. Is your dad obsessed with barbecuing? He might be a grill dad. Did he only really begin to see women as people deserving of political and social equality after he had daughters? That right there is the feminist dad!
The Father of Her Child
by Emma DarcyThey acted on impulse!Falling in love again... Lauren hadn't wanted or expected to. Yet when Michael Timberlane smiled at her across a crowded room, all her good resolutions went out of the window.Michael had also vowed never to fall in love again. And the last woman he wanted to share a life with was Lauren. He had every reason to despise her...and when she learned that he was out to break her heart, she resolved never to see him again.Too late! For their one-night stand had consequences that would keep them together forever....Praise for Emma Darcy's The Fatherhood Affair"Emma Darcy pulls no punches with this emotionally stirring tale that readers will want to savor."-Romantic Times
The Father of Her Son
by Kathleen PickeringHer life is not front page news!News anchor Evan McKenna knows a good thing when he sees it. And Kelly Sullivan and her son Matt definitely fall into that category. If Evan had his way, he'd be part of their little family. Only Kelly is proving resistant to his charms. He knows an attraction this strong is more than one-sided, so something else is keeping them apart. Despite his best efforts, he can't convince her to tell him.Then Kelly's past becomes a major news story, which puts Matt's safety in jeopardy. Evan is willing to do anything to protect them. For the first time, his career takes a backseat to something more important-family and a future with Kelly. Now he just has to prove it to her....
The Fatherhood Affair
by Emma DarcyDamien Chandler wants a child! He thinks Natalie Hayes will make the ideal mother.Natalie Hayes wants a child! She just can't picture Damien Chandler in the role of father.Natalie has tried not to think of Damien as anything but a business acquaintance, and she succeeds...until the night they share a bed! Damien has never been able to resist a challenge-now he faces the biggest challenge of his life. He has to convince Natalie that perfect lovers can become perfect parents, too!
The Fathom Flies Again
by James WalleyIt's time to wake up and smell the carnage. Just as every night gives way to dawn, all dreams yield to the break of day. For Marty, that's kind of a problem. When you've fought killer clowns, sailed the seven skies, and generally laid waste to your own dreamspace, real life can be kind of a drag. At least, until your nightmares crawl through the cracks and shadows, and take a liking to your town. When the jesters come a knocking, it's time to man up. When the unmentionables under your bed come a biting, it's time to grab your trusty, pint-sized pirate compadre and lead a charge against the night terrors. What does this mean for Marty? It means the crew of The Flying Fathom are back, surfing on rainbows, swashing their buckles, and saving the world, one sleepy little town at a time. Book one of this series, The Forty First Wink, brought you a glimpse of utter, rum-swilling madness. Now The Fathom Flies Again, pushing you over the edge and chuckling at your plummeting screams, before scuttling off to find something shiny to steal. Remember, if you hear something under your bed, don't move. Don't make a sound. Draw your cutlass and think of something devilishly witty to shout, because things, my friend, are about to get all too real.