- Table View
- List View
The Enlightenment of Daniel (Sex In Seattle Ser. #2)
by Eli EastonSex in Seattle: Book TwoBusiness tycoon Daniel Derenzo lives for his work until his dying father reminds him life is short. When Daniel starts to reevaluate his world he experiences a startling revelation--he's attracted to his business partner and best friend, Nick, even though Daniel always believed himself to be straight. In typical type-A fashion, Daniel dissects his newfound desires with the help of the experts at the Expanded Horizons sex clinic. He goes after Nick with the fierce determination that's won him many a business deal. Nick Ross was in love with Daniel years ago, when they were roommates in college. But Daniel was straight and Nick patched his broken heart by marrying Marcia. Two kids and fourteen years later, they go through the motions of their marriage like ships passing in the night. But Nick's kids mean the world to him, and he's afraid he'll never get joint custody if they divorced. If he can trust his heart to an awakening Daniel, they all might find their way to a happily ever after.
The Enormous Crocodile
by Roald DahlFrom the bestselling author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and The BFG! This picture book has a beautiful full-color interior and large trim to feature Quentin Blake's iconic art.The Enormous Crocodile is a horrid greedy grumptious brute who loves to guzzle up little boys and girls. But the other animals have had enough of his cunning tricks, so they scheme to get the better of this foul fiend, once and for all!
The Enormouse Pearl Heist: The Enormouse Pearl Heist (Geronimo Stilton #51)
by Geronimo StiltonPetunia Pretty Paws, Bugsy Wugsy, Benjamin and I were exploring underwater at Pirate Island one day, when we made an amazing discovery. It was an huge clam that had an enormouse pearl inside! I was so excited about this extremely rare, precious pearl that I wrote a special feature about it in the Rodent's Gazette. But that attracted good attention--and bad! The enormouse pearl was in danger. Would my friends and I be able to protect it?<P><p> <i>Advisory: Bookshare has learned that this book offers only partial accessibility. We have kept it in the collection because it is useful for some of our members. To explore further access options with us, please contact us through the Book Quality link on the right sidebar. Benetech is actively working on projects to improve accessibility issues such as these. </i>
The Entertainment Weekly Seinfeld Companion: An Unofficial Guide to TV's Funniest Show
by Entertainment Weekly Inc.The hottest personality in network television is celebrated in this illustrated guide to Seinfeld, featuring the expressions, situations, and idiosyncracies beloved by fans of this top-ten-rated sitcom. Fretts has written extensively about Seinfeld for Entertainment Weekly. 100 photos.
The Enthusiast: A Novel
by Charlie HaasHenry Bay has his own America going. If there's an offbeat interest or extreme sport that's poised to sweep the nation, chances are there's a magazine for its enthusiasts, and chances are also good that Henry has worked there. He's a modern nomad, associate-editing his way from state to state, exploring the small worlds that make up modern America from Spelunk to Ice Climbing, to Cozy, The Magazine of Tea.But those are other people's interests—Henry's still looking for his own enthusiasm. He ends up finding more than he ever imagined in this energetic, hilarious debut novel from a surprising and promising new voice.
The Envious Siblings: And Other Morbid Nursery Rhymes
by Landis BlairEight gleefully macabre rhyming vignettes by an award-winning comics artist, as delightful as they are deadly. Inspired by the dark imagination of Edward Gorey, Envious Siblings is a twisted and hauntingly funny debut. Comics artist Landis Blair interweaves absurdist horror and humor into brief, rhyming vignettes at once transgressive and hilarious. In Blair’s surreal universe, a lost child watches as bewhiskered monsters gobble up her fellow train passengers; a band of kids merrily plays a gut-churning game with playground toys; and two sisters, grinning madly, tear each other apart. These charmingly perverse creations take ordinary settings—a living room, a subway car, a playground—and spin them in a nightmarish direction. Envious Siblings heralds a brilliant new cartooning talent, and will captivate readers who have thrilled to the lurid fantasies of Roald Dahl, Quentin Blake, Charles Addams, Shel Silverstein, and Tim Burton.
The Epic Adventures of Huggie & Stick
by Drew Daywalt* "A surefire read-aloud for any wannabe hero." --Booklist (starred review)From Drew Daywalt, the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Day the Crayons Quit, comes a hilarious buddy-comedy picture book starring a grouchy stuffed bunny and a happy-go-lucky stick.When super cheerful Stick and grumpy stuffed bunny Huggie get thrown from a backpack, the adventure is on! Together this odd couple survives encounters with sea-faring pirates, raging rhinos in Africa, sword-wielding royalty in Europe, stick-eating panda bears in Asia, sharks in Australia, hungry penguins in Antarctica, and piranhas in South America--all before finally making it home to North America. A fantastically funny read-aloud about two unlikely friends and their epic journey around the world.
The Era of Not Quite
by Douglas WatsonThe Era of Not Quite is chock-a-block with deaths, births, sea and land voyages, excursions to the library, philosophical asides, and things like wolves. People fall in and out of love, walk in and out of buildings, take two steps forward and two steps back. Futility is a theme of the book, but so is the necessity of trying.
The Era of Not Quite (American Readers Series #19)
by Douglas WatsonThe Era of Not Quite is chock-a-block with deaths, births, sea and land voyages, excursions to the library, philosophical asides, and things like wolves. People fall in and out of love, walk in and out of buildings, take two steps forward and two steps back. Futility is a theme of the book, but so is the necessity of trying.
The Erma Bombeck Collection: If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?, Motherhood, and The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank
by Erma BombeckThree hilarious books in one from the #1 New York Times–bestselling author on marriage, motherhood, and the absurdities of suburban life. If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits? is Erma Bombeck&’s timelessly witty look at the hidden side of married life.Motherhood captures one of the toughest jobs on earth with humor and heart.The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank is Bombeck&’s take on the unforgiving frontier of American suburbia.
The Error of Our Ways: A Novel
by David CarkeetNew York Times Notable Book: &“The sorrows of Job [visit] a St. Louis nut salesman, with hilarious results . . . [A] wry updating of the biblical tragedy&” (Kirkus Reviews, starred review). In this &“astute, entertaining novel,&” two very different men cross each other&’s paths in St. Louis, Missouri (The New York Times). Ben Hudnut is an upper-middle-class entrepreneur determined to bring an affordable cashew to American consumers. When he isn&’t pursuing this goal, he&’s usually in the company of his wife and four daughters—occasionally joined for family dinner by his dull but devoted secretary. Jeremy Cook, meanwhile, is a cynical unemployed academic, a linguist who doesn&’t know what to do with himself—until he&’s pressured into studying Ben Hudnut&’s baby girl and her unusual speech patterns. But as different as these two men are, they will soon have one thing in common, as both of their lives begin to fall apart around them . . . &“A dark domestic comedy that traces the perils of middle-aged manhood, told with attentiveness to the subtleties of communication.&” —The New York Times Book Review &“Witty, good-natured, and completely convincing: Carkeet has managed, with sympathy and charm, to trace the exceptional adventures of an utterly ordinary man.&” —Kirkus Reviews (starred review) &“A shrewd, wickedly funny delight, full of hilarious takes on rocky marriages, sexual boredom, raising kids, communication gaps—and nutty doings, as in almonds and cashews . . . A delectable observer of human foibles and pretense.&” —Publishers Weekly (starred review)
The Ersatz Elevator (A Series of Unfortunate Events #6)
by Lemony Snicket Brett Helquist Michael Kupperman<P>In their most daring misadventure, the Baudelaire orphans are adopted by very, very rich people, whose penthouse apartment is located mysteriously close to the place where all their misfortune began. Even though their new home in the city is fancy, and the children are clever and charming, I'm sorry to say that still, the unlucky orphans will encounter more disaster and woe. <P>In fact, in this sixth book in A Series of Unfortunate Events, the children will experience a darkened staircase, a red herring, an auction, parsley soda, some friends in a dire situation, a secret passageway, and pinstripe suits. <P>Both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted, A Series of Unfortunate Events offers an exquisitely dark comedy in the tradition of Edward Gorey and Roald Dahl. Lemon Snicket's uproariously unhappy books continue to win readers, despite all his warning.
The Escape Diaries
by Juliet RosettiIntroducing the hilarious new heroine, Mazie Maguire, in Juliet Rosetti's irresistible debut novel that follows the outrageous adventure of a woman on the run. Wrongly convicted of killing her philandering husband, Mazie Maguire is three years into her life sentence when fate intervenes--in the form of a tornado. Just like that, she's on the other side of the fence, running through swamps and cornfields, big box stores and suburban subdivisions. Hoping to find out who really murdered her husband, Mazie must stay a few steps ahead of both the law and her mother-in-law, who would like nothing better than to personally administer Mazie the death penalty via lethal snickerdoodle. With the Feds in hot pursuit and the national media hyping her story, Mazie stumbles upon a vast political conspiracy and a man who might just be worth a conjugal visit--if she survives. Includes a special message from the editor, as well as excerpts from these Loveswept titles: The Devil's Thief, Paradise Café, and The Perfect Catch.
The Escape Manual for Introverts
by Katie VazTrapped in an airplane seated next to a chatterbox? Are you hosting a dinner party with people who just won't leave? Katie Vaz has the key to your escape. The Escape Manual for Introverts guides readers through different scenarios with themed chapters ("Friends," "Relatives," "Strangers," etc.). Each chapter covers a range of situations, from an invitation to karaoke night to group lunchtime. And she offers a number of escapes for each scenario: bringing odoriferous foods to lunch for a while, having a pet (real or imagined) that "requires" frequent check-ins, and even investing in a jet pack. This book features Vaz's full-page illustrated spreads, hand-lettering, and spot illustrations. From the silly to the sincere, Vaz's clever, hilarious escape plans and bizarre excuses speak to the introvert in all of us.
The Escapement: The Engineer Trilogy: Book Three (Engineer Trilogy #3)
by K. J. Parker'When so many fantasy sagas are tired, warmed-over affairs, a writer like K.J. Parker is more of a hurricane than a breath of fresh air.' - Dreamwatch'This is grown-up fantasy blessed with humour, intelligence and... panache. A bravura display of intricate storytelling and artfully-doled-out revelations.' - SFXCondemned to death, the engineer Ziani Vaatzes escaped from Mezentia. His implacable determination to return home led him to contrive an intricate plan to bring down the Republic, a plan which require a war. He regrets the deaths. But he had no choice.Duke Valens dragged his people into the war to save the life of one woman. Then he killed her husband. Now, allied to the nomadic barbarians who have the manpower to defeat Mezentia, the Duke regrets the evil he's done. But he had no choice.Secretary Psellus never wanted to rule the Republic, or fight a desperate siege for its survival. Trying to make sense of how it all happened, he finds himself compelled to investigate the circumstances of Vaatzes' crime. He is terrified of what he might find out, but he has no choice.The machine has been built. All that remains is to set it in motion.The stunning conclusion to The Engineer Trilogy - a fast-moving mix of politics, action and intelligent world-building - that continues to push the boundaries of fantasy fiction.Books by K.J. Parker:Fencer TrilogyThe Colours in the SteelThe Belly of the BowThe Proof HouseScavenger TrilogyShadowPatternMemoryEngineer TrilogyDevices and DesiresEvil for EvilThe EscapementSaloninusBlue and GoldThe Devil You KnowTwo of SwordsThe Two of Swords: Part 1The Two of Swords: Part 2The Two of Swords: Part 3NovelsThe CompanyThe Folding KnifeThe HammerSharpsSavagesSixteen Ways to Defend a Walled CityMy Beautiful Life
The Essential Book of Useless Information
by Don VoorheesMore facts! Less substance! The newest entry in the #1 New York Times bestselling Useless Information series. The useless information never ends in the newest, most crucially meaningless entry in the Useless Information series. This latest cornucopia of amazingly pointless facts and figures will have trivia buffs marveling at all the things they never needed to know.
The Essential Compendium of Dad Jokes: The Best of the Worst Dad Jokes for the Painfully Punny Parent: 301 Jokes!
by Thomas NowakThe Essential Compendium of Dad Jokes features 301 wonderfully cringe-worthy dad jokes—including the classics, twists on the classics, and fresh new material.For the first time ever, the best of the worst dad jokes are compiled in one pun-filled place. With original illustrations throughout, this extensive collection is sure to provide hours of silliness for the whole family. After all, no matter how groan-inducing dad jokes are, they will always have a special place in the joke arsenal.• Contains dozens of interesting tidbits, joke-telling pointers, and profiles of legendary dad jokers• Features jokes from "I'm on a seafood diet , , , I see food and I eat it" to "I used to hate facial hair . . . but now it's growing on me"• Great for fathers, patient mothers, tolerant children, and anyone else who loves a punThey make us cringe, chuckle, and roll our eyes, but we all love a wonderfully corny dad joke.The Essential Compendium of Dad Jokes is so bad it's good, ensuring loads of laughter for the whole family. • A hilarious book for dads and dads at heart, as well as pun and dumb joke lovers• Add it to the collection of books like 101 So Bad, They're Good Dad Jokes by Elias Hill, Jokes Every Man Should Know (Stuff You Should Know) by Don Steinberg, and Dad Jokes: Terribly Good Dad Jokes by Share The Love Gifts
The Essential Dave Allen
by Graham McCannWhen Dave Allen passed away in March 2005, we lost a true comedy great. Sitting cross-legged on a high stool, whiskey in one hand, cigarette in the other, Dave Allen's exasperated commentaries on the absurdities of modern life struck a chord with millions of fans in Britain, Ireland and Australia for over four decades. He was a compelling storyteller - able to spin shaggy dog stories out of the almost any subject, including the missing tip of his fourth finger of his left hand, for which he provided various unlikely explanations. But his gentle, laconic wit could also give way to ferocious attacks on the media, the state and, most famously, the Catholic Church. He was a unique talent - a comic who could make his audiences laugh, cry, and be shocked, all in one.This official celebration of Dave Allen's comedy has been drawn together by Graham McCann - Britain's best-loved entertainment writer. It is a treasure trove of stories, stand-up routines, sketches, interviews and photos, which takes us on a journey from the cradle to the grave. It will delight Dave Allen's million of fans, old and new alike.'Dave Allen was our greatest storyteller and nobody ever came close to his ability to spin a yarn. He was unique, right up there with the greats.' Jack Dee
The Essential Dave Allen
by Graham MccannWhen Dave Allen passed away in March 2005, we lost a true comedy great. Sitting cross-legged on a high stool, whiskey in one hand, cigarette in the other, Dave Allen's exasperated commentaries on the absurdities of modern life struck a chord with millions of fans in Britain, Ireland and Australia for over four decades. He was a compelling storyteller - able to spin shaggy dog stories out of the almost any subject, including the missing tip of his fourth finger of his left hand, for which he provided various unlikely explanations. But his gentle, laconic wit could also give way to ferocious attacks on the media, the state and, most famously, the Catholic Church. He was a unique talent - a comic who could make his audiences laugh, cry, and be shocked, all in one.This official celebration of Dave Allen's comedy has been drawn together by Graham McCann - Britain's best-loved entertainment writer. It is a treasure trove of stories, stand-up routines, sketches, interviews and photos, which takes us on a journey from the cradle to the grave. It will delight Dave Allen's million of fans, old and new alike.'Dave Allen was our greatest storyteller and nobody ever came close to his ability to spin a yarn. He was unique, right up there with the greats.' Jack Dee
The Essential Max Brooks
by Max Brooks"Brooks [is] America's most prominent maven on the living dead...Gripping reading." --Hartford CourantThis collection, available exclusively as an ebook, brings together two New York Times bestselling titles from Max Brooks: The Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z. Fully illustrated and exhaustively comprehensive, The Zombie Survival Guide is the key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now. In World War Z, Brooks delivers an invaluable chronicle of the Zombie War, told in the haunting and riveting voices of the men and women who witnessed the horror firsthand.
The Essential Wit of the World's Funniest People
by Daniel BukszpanThis compendium of timeless wit includes jokes, aphorisms and observations from Dorothy Parker, George Carlin, Franz Kafka, Bill Murray, and many others.We’ve all heard the saying, “Everyone’s a comedian.” While that may be true, let’s face it—not everyone is funny. And even fewer are truly witty. As Daniel Bukszpan puts it in his introduction to this volume, witty saying have the ability to relate “something truthful about mankind’s folly in a matter of just a few words.” That truth-telling is the common factor that unites this collection of jokes, asides, aphorisms, and observations from some of the wittiest individuals in history. Here you’ll find everyone from W.C. Fields to H.L. Mencken, and from Margaret Cho to Ralph Waldo Emerson, offering pithy insights on subjects such as money, religion, romance, popular culture—and everything in between.
The Essex Joke Book
by Nicholas KnightsWARNING: This book contains laugh-out-loud jokes about fake tans, vajazzles and all fings EssexForget the Rolex or the flash car, what you really need in your life to make your friends well jel is The Essex Joke Book. It’s packed full of bling-tastic banter, racy rib-ticklers and gob-smackingly good gags all about Essex Girls and Boys, their tans and tribulations, conquests and cock-ups, and more. How can you tell an Essex Girl has been using her iPad? There’s Tipp-Ex on the screen.What do you call the skeleton of an Essex Boy in a wardrobe?Last year’s hide-and-seek champion.What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette?An Essex Girl doing naked cartwheels.An Essex Girl gets a job as a teacher. She notices a boy in the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. ‘You can go and play with the other kids, you know,’ she says.‘It’s best I stay here,’ he says.‘Why?’ asks the Essex Girl.The boy says: ‘Because I’m the f**king goalkeeper.’
The Estate: A Novel
by Martin KingHailed by the authorites as `the future of housing', The Estate in south London was opened with a flourish by the Lord Mayor of London in the late 1960s. The six 20-storey tower blocks were seen as the new way forward for community life in London. However, within a matter of weeks it had all started to go wrong as racial tensions built up and families of ethnic minorities clashed. Based on true stories, THE ESTATE is a novel based around 11 different families living side by side in The Estate, and their perceptions of it. We find out how the Indion family, the gypsies, the gay couple and the landlord of the local pub all deal with new homes and the dynamics of a multi racial community. Building up to a finale at The Estate's Christmas party, this is a poignant and funny account of how life really treated the occupants of the tower blocks.
The Ethical Swordsman (Tales of the King's Blades)
by Dave DuncanIn the final adventure in the King&’s Blades series, one of the Blades is asked to go undercover to hunt down a possible threat to the crown of Chivial. Niall&’s father raised him to be a man of his word, and Niall has tried to live that way throughout his life, even during his training to become a Blade. But things have changed. King Ambrose has died. His daughter, Malinda, is now queen and behaving suspiciously. When she makes Niall Prime of the Blades, he is asked to swear an oath to protect her—and then is made a spy. Now Niall faces a mission that challenges everything he believes and must place his life on the line for a leader he&’s not certain he can trust . . . Praise for Dave Duncan &“Dave Duncan is one of the best writers in the fantasy world today. His writing is clear, vibrant, and full of energy. His action scenes are breathtaking, and his skill at characterization is excellent.&” —Writers Write&“Duncan excels at old-fashioned swashbuckling fantasy, maintaining a delicate balance between breathtaking excitement, romance, and high camp in a genre that is very easy to overdo.&” —RT Book Reviews
