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The Va Dinci Cod
by Adam RobertsSomething fishy is going on in the world of artistic scholarship. How can there possibly be a link between the hidden cod of Leonardo Da Vinci's paintings and the over fishing of the North Atlantic fish stocks? Could it be that Leonardo Da Vinci, the greatest genius of his age and inventor of the photocopier and mouse mat, had a chilling insight into European Union Fishing policies.Only one man can find out. Robert Hangdog, international scholar, master spy and action hero. Oh and Bezu Fish.
The Va Dinci Cod
by Adam RobertsSomething fishy is going on in the world of artistic scholarship. How can there possibly be a link between the hidden cod of Leonardo Da Vinci's paintings and the over fishing of the North Atlantic fish stocks? Could it be that Leonardo Da Vinci, the greatest genius of his age and inventor of the photocopier and mouse mat, had a chilling insight into European Union Fishing policies.Only one man can find out. Robert Hangdog, international scholar, master spy and action hero. Oh and Bezu Fish.
The Vale of Laughter: A Novel
by Peter De VriesA brilliant, fiercely funny novel that ponders the eternal question: is it better to laugh or cry? Joe Sandwich is a clown. Not literally, but what else do you call an eleven-year-old who goes to church to confess his good deeds: &“I did my homework without being told&”? A stockbroker who gets seasick watching the market tape and claims the gross national product is &“deodorants&”? A father who mows curse words into his lawn and names his son Hamilton because, well, who can resist a Ham Sandwich? Prankster, punster, cut-up, card—Joe needs to crack wise about everything. Has he figured out the secret to embracing the inherent absurdity of life, or is there some terrible anxiety at the root of his compulsion? Lots of people want to know, including his wife, Naughty, who is anything but; his mistress, Gloria Bunshaft; and her husband, Wally Hines, a humorless professor who specializes is the philosophy of humor. &“If you look back,&” says Joe, &“you turn into a pillar of salt. If you look ahead, you turn into a pillar of society.&” He prefers to live in the moment, from one gag to the next, but the joke he doesn&’t see coming may get the biggest laugh of all.
The Valentine Affair!
by Mary LyonsSex, lies and Valentines!Alexandra Pemberton had promised her newspaper a Valentine exclusive: the story of Leo Hamilton's whirlwind engagement to Fiona Bliss. By fair means or foul-and more likely foul!-Fiona had succeeded where many had failed, and got the world's most determined bachelor at least halfway to the altar!Alex was impressed! She was also-she had to admit-jealous as hell! Eight years ago Leo had almost seduced Alex-almost. It had never been enough. And dogging Leo's all-too-attractive heels, Alex realized that she wanted Leo as an exclusive, all right-exclusively hers!Mary Lyons writes sharp, sophisticated and sexy stories that will leave you chuckling and breathless for more!
The Valentine's Hate: A Novel
by Sidney HalstonA delightful enemy to lovers/fake engagement rom-com themed around Valentine’s Day! Jennifer Lopez’s new movie Marry Me meets Erin Sterling’s holiday themed The Ex Hex.Cupid only strikes once. At least that’s what Lissette Alonso believes. Ever since the Most Disastrous Valentine’s Day of All Time™ she has hated all things V-day. But Lizzie’s best friend is having pre-nuptial festivities for a week leading up to her February 14th wedding and Lissette is taking her maid of honor duties seriously, maybe too seriously. Of course of course of course who is the first person she runs into on the way to the wedding? None other than her childhood nemesis, Brian Anderson, the reason for all of her Valentine’s Day hatred.Brian knows he messed up with Lizzie but give him a break, he was just a kid who was trying to look cool and Lizzie regularly pushed all of his buttons—both in school and out of it. He’s always been gruff and grumpy, but these days, Brian is much better off with his writing; fictional characters never talk back. Unlike Lizzie who always has something to say. Suddenly the two are back under the same roof and bickering like old times, except that Brian has bigger problems than dealing with Lizzie’s verbal sparring. Someone Brian is desperate to avoid shows up and somehow Lizzie gets roped into pretending to be dating him. And, suddenly, the simmering anger has blossomed into something extra spicy…
The Valiant Little Tailor: A Novel (The Margellos World Republic of Letters)
by Eric ChevillardThe classic Grimms' fairy tale of the valiant little tailor, as you&’ve never read it before Once upon a time, there lived a valiant little tailor who killed seven flies with one blow—but who is this narrator who has abruptly inserted himself into the story, claiming authorship? He&’s indignant: the fairy tale, borne carelessly along by the popular imagination, subjected to the transformations of oral tradition, was collected in a lamentable state by the Brothers Grimm, and he intends to restore the tale and its giant-slaying, unicorn-fighting, boar-hunting star to their original magnificence. But the true hero of the story remains to be seen: Is it the tailor, the narrator, or someone else entirely? In this explosive retelling of the classic tale, Éric Chevillard enlists the reader in a dizzying game of crack-the-whip, with new directions and delights in every paragraph. At once irreverent and deeply sincere, this book is a mischievous, multifarious celebration of the power of stories and those who tell them.
The Valtieri Baby
by Caroline AndersonWedding planner Anita della Rossa is an expert in arranging happy-ever-afters-except her own, that is. Five years ago her childhood sweetheart Giovanni Valtieri ended their relationship abruptly, keeping his reasons as secret as the love he still feels for Anita.When Gio and Anita find themselves alone in a Tuscan hideaway, familiar passion rises to the surface once more. Gio is still struggling to open his heart...but with Anita's baby bombshell ringing in his ears can this brooding Italian finally make all Anita's dreams come true?
The Vampire Combat Manual
by Roger MaWHEN DARKNESS FALLS... WHEN THE UNDEAD RISE WITH A HUNGER FOR BLOOD... WHEN THE HUNT IS ON--AND YOU ARE THE PREY... WILL YOU BE READY? In the inevitable event of a vampire attack, the average citizen will be forced to engage in vicious hand-to-hand combat. To avoid serious injury, disfigurement, or death by exsanguination, you need to know the proper combat strategies and techniques to ward off a stronger, faster, more agile undead opponent looking to drain the life from your body. Are you prepared? With detailed illustrations and firsthand accounts from vampire combat veterans--as well as interviews with actual members of the undead--this manual provides you with the information you need to survive with your life and blood supply intact, including: * Debunking myths, i.e.: vampire flight, animal metamorphosis, physical attraction to humans * Crafting the most lethal vampire weapons from everyday materials * The pros--and cons--of decapitation * Weaponizing Ultraviolet (UV) light against an undead opponent * Using the Domicile Histodiscordant Reaction (DHR), otherwise known as "The Vampire Invitation," to your advantage * Solo attacks, team-based combat, and much more... The Vampire Combat Manual is your indispensable key to survival, whether in a one-on-one battle for blood or a face-off against multiple attackers. Don't wait until the sun goes down--prepare yourself now!
The Vampire Survival Guide: How to Fight, and Win, Against the Undead (Zen of Zombie Series)
by Scott BowenVampires have walked among us for thousands of years. These reanimated corpses survive by draining and consuming the blood of the living, and their threat to humanity cannot be ignored. Throughout the centuries, professors and peasants have offered their own vampire-fighting tips, but these were often old wives' tales, based more on superstition than on fact. Here, for the first time, is a comprehensive vampire-fighting guide for the twenty-first century. In the tradition of bestsellers like The Zombie Survival Guide and The Zen of Zombie, The Vampire Survival Guide covers everything you need to know to protect yourself from vampires. Topics include the habits and routines of vampires, how to tell if somebody you know has become a vampire, how to protect yourself from attack, how to set traps, what to do if you must fight off multiple vampires, how to cleanse an entire town after devastating vampiric attacks, and much more. It confronts head-on the most terrifying situation of all-that of being bitten by a vampire-by providing the reader with numerous approaches, rooted in both science and medicine and religion, for fighting off blood-suckers before it is too late. Vampires are found in every country in the world-not just in Eastern Europe and Sunnydale, California. With the human population expected to reach over 9 billion by the year 2050, confrontations between men, women, children, and vampires are increasingly inevitable. This guide is the human race's best hope.
The Vanishing Pumpkin
by Tony JohnstonA classic Halloween story about a pumpkin gone missing is certain to delight readers of all ages!When a 700-year-old woman and an 800-year-old man want to make pumpkin pie on Halloween, they can&’t find their pumpkin. &“Our pumpkin&’s been snitched,&” cries the woman. And off they go to find it. &“A good bet for Halloween story hours.&”—School Library Journal &“There can never be enough Halloween stories. This one is appealing, participatory, fast-paced and a delight in the telling.&”—Children&’s Book Review Service
The Vanishing Vampire: A Monsterrific Tale (Monsterrific Tales)
by David LubarThere's something strange going on at Washington Irving Elementary School. People are turning into monsters—literally! In The Vanishing Vampire, Sebastian's life has become a real pain in the neck. It all started the night he walked home from the movies by himself. He sort of blacked out and the next morning, he woke up as a vampire. Now he has only one chance to turn back into a human. And time is running out…. With its blend of humor and horror, David Lubar's middle-grade monsteriffic tales series will appeal to the same audience that has made his Weenies short story collections such a success.At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
The Vanishing of Billy Buckle: The Detective Agency's Third Case (The Fairy Detective Agency #3)
by Sally GardnerSpot on the Fishcake!The famous fairy detective agency, Wings & Co, has a problem. Really quite a big problem. Well, a few of them actually.There's the missing giant, Billy Buckle, who has vanished without a trace, and left his giant daughter with the detectives. There's a surprise visit to the seaside, which uncovers a murder and a stolen diamond. And then there's that tricky business of the TV talent show.Squat on a squid, this is Emily, Buster and Fidget's most complicated case yet.Read by Simon Russell Beale(P)2004 Orion Publishing Group.Ltd
The Variable Man and Other Stories (Dover Thrift Editions: Short Stories)
by Philip K. DickA seminal figure of twentieth-century science fiction, Philip K. Dick ponders the very nature of humanity in this anthology of five gripping short stories and novellas that were first published in early 1950s pulp magazines. Written during the Cold War, “The Defenders” presents a tale of robotic warfare. “Foster, You’re Dead” criticizes consumerism and the Cold War, when the military-industrial complex shifted responsibility for self-defense to families by selling bomb shelters. “Piper in the Woods” is a clever short story concerning the erosion of reality. A military psychologist is tasked with solving the mystery of why military personnel are behaving like plants upon their return from an asteroid. “Second Variety” is prescient in its anticipation of the hazards of self-evolving robots that can operate independently of one another. In “The Variable Man,” Earth relies on computer technology and a time traveler to predict their chances of victory in a fight against aliens. This collection is an excellent introduction to one of the most original minds of the modern era.
The Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy's Dossier on Hillary Clinton
by Amanda B. CarpenterShe is the darling of the Manhattan elite, the hope of the national Democratic Party, the MVP of the pro-choice feminist movement, the rock star of the Hollywood Left, and the favorite of the liberal media.Luckily, over here at the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, we've been keeping a file on her.Written in the style and format of the New York Times bestseller The Official Handbook of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, this expose is full of fresh reporting, devastating quotes, scandalous stories, funny sidebars, and forgotten but telling incidents from Hillary Clinton's past.
The Venadicci Marriage Vengeance (Latin Lovers)
by Melanie MilburneGabriella St. Clair is desperate: she and her family face financial ruin. One man can help her. But he's the very man who wants to see her beg….Merciless tycoon Vinn Venadicci had a heart once. But after an encounter with the young, spoiled hotel heiress Gabriella, any feelings he had were locked away…forever. Now she's on his doorstep—pleading. He could send her packing. Or finally have a little vengeance of his own. After all, Gabriella Venadicci has quite a ring to it….
The Vengeance Affair (Secret Passions)
by Carole MortimerA marriage proposal because of vengeance...or love?Beau Garrett wanted a more peaceful existence. But the seemingly idyllic village of Aberton proved to be a hotbed of scandal and gossip--and Beau was the target! His "crime" was to employ female gardener Jaz Logan, branded by her mother's adulterous past. Soon Beau acted on his attraction to Jaz...and the poison pen letters started arriving. Just who was sending this cruel correspondence? Beau's solution was to propose that Jaz become his fiancée. But Jaz had always planned on marrying for love....
The Vengeful Husband (The Husband Hunters Club Series #2)
by Lynne GrahamAdvertising for a husband reunites a single mom with a former one-night stand in this classic marriage of convenience romance by a USA Today bestseller.Race to the altar—Maxie, Darcy, and Polly are the Husband Hunters.The terms of their godmother’s will: Maxie, Darcy and Polly have each been left a share of her estate—if they marry within a year and remain married for six months . . . The hunter:Darcy Fielding, a single mom, decides she must ADVERTISE for a husband! But the consequences of one night of unforgettable passion are about to return to haunt her . . . The husband? Gianluca Raffacani has finally traced the mysterious beauty who disappeared from his bed. She is advertising for a husband—his perfect opportunity for revenge . . . Only, Luca finds he’s married the mother of his secret child!Originally published in 1998.
The Very Best of Fesshole: Britain confesses anonymously
by Rob Manuel'Puerile, reprehensible and very, very funny' Adam Kay'I love Fesshole. Every single one is a masterclass in storytelling' Jay Rayner'Hilarious! The only guide any alien would need to find out what humans are really like' David Schneider'The wild, the wonderful, the frankly unbelievable and the downright disgusting. Under the anonymity of the internet people confess their most embarrassing secrets and it might not be good for their souls, but it's great for the readers!' Richard K Herring It's confession time, folks! Things have been building up inside of you for too long. Secrets you thought you'd never share with another soul are bubbling to the surface begging for release.And where better to let it all out (/laugh at someone else's misfortune) than on the internet.Fesshole is a Twitter account (@fesshole) which allows people to anonymously confess their innermost thoughts, deepest, darkest secrets, and their most outrageously funny faux pas - but will the online world absolve you of your sins?This book contains the greatest confessions to date, and a whole heap of new ones.After all, if you can't confide in strangers on the internet, who can you tell?
The Very Best of Fesshole: The New Fesstament
by Rob Manuel'A ridiculously reliable source of joy, shock and horror' - James O'Brien 'I sometimes read one of those fesses and wonder if I submitted it myself the night before, after a few beers' - James May The anonymous voices of the internet are back, ready to spill their deepest, darkest secrets and side-splitting faux pas.In this eagerly anticipated second coming, Rob Manuel has once again compiled the most jaw-dropping, knee-slapping, and cringe-inducing confessions out there.Prepare to immerse yourself in the seedy underbelly of human nature, where no secret is too taboo, no embarrassment is left unexplored, and laughter knows no bounds. Once again, the online world becomes an unexpected arena of collective catharsis, and this riotous read is an addictive deep dive into our shared guilt.This must have book contains favourite viral confessions, and a whole heap of new ones. After all, if you can't confide in strangers on the internet, who can you tell?
The Very Bloody History Of Britain, 2: The Last Bit!
by John FarmanJohn Farman makes history hysterical in this must-have companion volume to the best-selling THE VERY BLOODY HISTORY OF BRITAIN: THE FIRST BIT!It's the wittiest and wackiest chronicle of modern British history you'll find - ranging from post-war rationing, through the glut of the Thatcher yuppy years to the new millenium.
The Very British Problems Christmas Quiz Book: 600+ fiendishly festive questions (Knowledge quizzes)
by Rob TempleThe perfect quiz book to get you in the Christmassy mood, to play at the office Christmas lunch or to pop into a stocking.In Britain, it's estimated that 800 million of what traditional Christmas treat are eaten each year?Which actor gives the voiceover at the beginning of Love Actually?True or False: Queen Elizabeth II wore a Santa hat for her 1996 Christmas Day televised speech.We Brits can't get enough of a quiz - and never has this been more true at Christmastime. So if you're stumped for office party small talk, trying to make it through Christmas dinner with the in-laws, or simply a quiz connoisseur after puzzles with some festive flair, you can't go wrong with the VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS CHRISTMAS QUIZ BOOK. Inside you'll find all sorts of tickly teasers, complex conundrums, worrisome word searches and much more on topics ranging from nostalgic Christmas adverts and beloved TV specials to toys through the ages and everyone's favourite holiday snacks. Best enjoyed with a cup of tea and a mince pie.***Praise for Very British Problems'Had us guffawing into our Earl Grey tea' Bella'My favourite twitter account at the moment is Very British Problems (@soverybritish) . . . it makes me laugh out loud' Tom Hiddleston'Hilarious' Daily Express'Temple pays affectionate and comic homage to the sheer quirkiness of being British' Good Book Guide
The Very British Problems Christmas Quiz Book: 600+ fiendishly festive questions (Knowledge quizzes)
by Rob TempleThe perfect quiz book to get you in the Christmassy mood, to play at the office Christmas lunch or to pop into a stocking.In Britain, it's estimated that 800 million of what traditional Christmas treat are eaten each year?Which actor gives the voiceover at the beginning of Love Actually?True or False: Queen Elizabeth II wore a Santa hat for her 1996 Christmas Day televised speech.We Brits can't get enough of a quiz - and never has this been more true at Christmastime. So if you're stumped for office party small talk, trying to make it through Christmas dinner with the in-laws, or simply a quiz connoisseur after puzzles with some festive flair, you can't go wrong with the VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS CHRISTMAS QUIZ BOOK. Inside you'll find all sorts of tickly teasers, complex conundrums, worrisome word searches and much more on topics ranging from nostalgic Christmas adverts and beloved TV specials to toys through the ages and everyone's favourite holiday snacks. Best enjoyed with a cup of tea and a mince pie.***Praise for Very British Problems'Had us guffawing into our Earl Grey tea' Bella'My favourite twitter account at the moment is Very British Problems (@soverybritish) . . . it makes me laugh out loud' Tom Hiddleston'Hilarious' Daily Express'Temple pays affectionate and comic homage to the sheer quirkiness of being British' Good Book Guide
The Very British Problems Quiz Book
by Rob TempleWhat does 'custard and jelly' mean in cockney rhyming slang?Which biscuit has half of its name on top of the cooker and the other half on the door?And 25 million of what drink are served by British Airways each year?We Brits can't get enough of a quiz. Stumped for office party chit-chat? Quiz. Midweek visit to the pub? Quiz. Stuck inside in pyjamas on a rainy night and in the mood to cause a big family argument? You got it - quiz.This book is correspondingly filled with questions on all things wonderfully and unequivocally British - you'll find all sorts of tickly teasers, complex conundrums, worrisome word searches and much more on topics ranging from our iconic weather to types of cake. Best enjoyed with a cup of tea and your favourite biscuit(s).***ANSWERS: Telly, Hobnob, buy the book and find out!***Praise for Very British Problems'Had us guffawing into our Earl Grey tea' Bella'My favourite twitter account at the moment is Very British Problems (@soverybritish) . . . it makes me laugh out loud' Tom Hiddleston'Hilarious' Daily Express'Temple pays affectionate and comic homage to the sheer quirkiness of being British' Good Book Guide
The Very British Problems Quiz Book
by Rob TempleWhat does 'custard and jelly' mean in cockney rhyming slang?Which biscuit has half of its name on top of the cooker and the other half on the door?And 25 million of what drink are served by British Airways each year?We Brits can't get enough of a quiz. Stumped for office party chit-chat? Quiz. Midweek visit to the pub? Quiz. Stuck inside in pyjamas on a rainy night and in the mood to cause a big family argument? You got it - quiz.This book is correspondingly filled with questions on all things wonderfully and unequivocally British - you'll find all sorts of tickly teasers, complex conundrums, worrisome word searches and much more on topics ranging from our iconic weather to types of cake. Best enjoyed with a cup of tea and your favourite biscuit(s).***ANSWERS: Telly, Hobnob, buy the book and find out!***Praise for Very British Problems'Had us guffawing into our Earl Grey tea' Bella'My favourite twitter account at the moment is Very British Problems (@soverybritish) . . . it makes me laugh out loud' Tom Hiddleston'Hilarious' Daily Express'Temple pays affectionate and comic homage to the sheer quirkiness of being British' Good Book Guide
The Very British Quiz Book: How d’you make a proper cup of tea? (and 720 other essential questions)
by Geoff TibballsWill you be flummoxed by this Great British distraction?Do you know queuing etiquette? Twenty-one different ways to describe rain? Then this quiz book might be just your cup of tea.Politely challenge yourself, your family and your friends with questions on British culture, language, etiquette, of course, the weather, as well as lots of other essential, quintessential British subjects. Each quiz comprises 21 questions and answers are based on the real results from national surveys and polls. Hours of brain-bamboozling fun for all the family!