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Who Moved My Mouse?: A Self-Help Book for Cats (Who Don't Need Any Help)
by Dena HarrisWhile cats may hide their self-doubt behind dismissive 'you bore me' and 'I just sprayed the couch' smirks, underneath they are desperate to introduce meaning into their nine lives. This parody, based on classic self-help texts, has the answers.Has your cat been moping around in that patch of sunlight for more than 23 hours a day? Has kitty been overindulging in Whiskas in order to fill the vast emptiness within? While humans have plenty of self-help books to aid us in times of existential crisis, our feline friends have had to go it alone. Until now. This personal-growth book for cats (and their humans) uses the framework of classic self-help tomes to shed light on universal kitty questions. With chapters like 'A Cat's Conversations with God' and 'The Fur Agreements', this guide will empower cats to make the 20 minutes they're awake each day the best 20 minutes of their lives.
Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison
by Andy BorowitzThey threw the book at Madoff. Now here's the book he needs. While many books are offered for the CEO who aims to survive the cutthroat competition of the corporate jungle, not a single one offers to help those same CEOs when the law catches up with them. That is, until now. This book offers valuable advice for those executives who have cooked the books, and now find themselves paying the price. Borowitz covers all aspects of prison life, from exit strategies (prison-break tips) to ways of keeping the business acumen sharp (how to make the Warden your most valuable employee) to prison cell feng shui and even self-defense (how to use this book as a deadly weapon). Convicted corporate executives should look at this time spent in prison as an opportunity, rather than a disadvantage. New business contacts can be established, new management strategies tested-time can even be spent working on the golf game so it says sharp for ten, twenty, however many years. Direct from Bernie Madoff's cellmate,Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison is loaded with helpful tips, including: Complete Corporate-Speak/Prison Slang; Glossary; How to earn $$$ making vanity license plates; Trophy wives, and how to avoid becoming one; How to avoid getting back-stabbed literally. Don't forget, Who Moved My Soap? will be both small enough to fit in the pocket of your prison uniform, but also thick enough to hollow out and hide cigarettes in! Who Moved My Soap? is a must read for any white collar criminal. CEOs headed to the Big House will now have something to read to help them pass the time. It's also a must read for those of us who were fleeced by them.
Who Needs Mr Darcy?: heart-warming and hilarious, this is Lydia Bennet's story
by Jean BurnettPERFECT FOR FANS OF NETFLIX SENSATION BRIDGERTON AND JANE AUSTEN. This is the story of Lydia Bennet and her exploits in Regency London . . .Mr Wickham turned out to be a disappointing husband in many ways, the most notable being his early demise on the battlefields of Waterloo. And so Lydia Wickham, nee Bennet, still not twenty and ever-full of an enterprising spirit, must make her fortune independently. A lesser woman, without Lydia's natural ability to flirt uproariously on the dancefloor and cheat seamlessly at the card table, would swoon in the wake of a dashing highwayman, a corrupt banker and even an amorous Royal or two. But on the hunt for a marriage that will make her rich, there's nothing that Lydia won't turn her hand to . . .Taking in London, Paris and Brighton, Who Needs Mr Darcy? details the charming, lively and somewhat dastardly further exploits of the youngest Bennet sister. Pride and Prejudice this isn't, and Mr Darcy certainly won't be rescuing her this time . . .'High-spirited, great fun and full of racket Georgian atmosphere' DAILY MAIL'The plot romps along in this funny and charming novel . . . a perfect book to curl up with as the evenings draw in' BRISTOL MAGAZINEReaders love WHO NEEDS MR DARCY?:'Perfectly pitched . . . Highly recommended''Fun and fast-paced. Loved it!''Gives the black sheep of the Bennet family her own chance to shine''A refreshing, fun and exciting adventure'
Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung?
by Ajahn BrahmThe 108 pieces in the international bestseller Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung? offer thoughtful commentary on everything from love and commitment to fear and pain. Drawing from his own life experience, as well as traditional Buddhist folk tales, author Ajahn Brahm uses over thirty years of spiritual growth as a monk to spin delightful tales that can be enjoyed in silence or read aloud to friends and family. Featuring titles such as "The Two-Finger Smile" and "The Worm and His Lovely Pile of Dung," these wry and witty stories provide playful, pithy takes on the basic building blocks of everyday life. Suitable for children, adults, and anyone in between, this eloquent volume wraps insight and inspiration inside of a good old yarn.
Who Put That Hair in My Toothbrush?
by Jerry SpinelliWho Put That Hair in My Toothbrush? Sibling rivalry at its finest! Whether it's on the hockey ice, at school, or at home, Greg and Megin just can't seem to get along. She calls him Grosso, he calls her Megamouth. They battle with donuts, cockroaches, and hair. Will it take a tragedy for them to realize how much they actually care for each other?
Who Said That First?: The Curious Origins of Common Words and Phrases
by Max CryerWho first wrote ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’, ‘accidentally on purpose’ or ‘no pain, no gain?' Did you know that there is no evidence Queen Victoria said ‘We are not amused’ or Marie Antoinette proclaimed ‘Let them eat cake’, but ‘iron curtain’ was in use for 40 years before Winston Churchill said it, and we have P. G. Wodehouse to thank for ‘straight from the horse’s mouth’?This witty and accessible compendium reveals the obscure origins of over 500 common phrases, dispelling myths and offering plenty of fascinating facts to delight the trivia-holic in all of us.
Who Said That First?: The Curious Origins of Common Words and Phrases
by Max CryerWho first wrote ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’, ‘accidentally on purpose’ or ‘no pain, no gain?' Did you know that there is no evidence Queen Victoria said ‘We are not amused’ or Marie Antoinette proclaimed ‘Let them eat cake’, but ‘iron curtain’ was in use for 40 years before Winston Churchill said it, and we have P. G. Wodehouse to thank for ‘straight from the horse’s mouth’?This witty and accessible compendium reveals the obscure origins of over 500 common phrases, dispelling myths and offering plenty of fascinating facts to delight the trivia-holic in all of us.
Who Said That?: Take the Quote Quiz Challenge
by Owen FrankTest your quote IQ! Who said this? “I think, therefore I am.” A. Marcus Aurelius B. Gautama Buddha C. René Descartes D. Nicolas Cage With hundreds of witticisms, musings, disses, words of inspiration, and canny observations, all wrapped up in the form of an addictive game with different ways to play, Who Said That? Is the most fun you can have while actually getting smarter. Or to put it another way, where else would you find Albert Einstein, Mother Teresa, Jay-Z, Bill Clinton, Patti Smith, Charlie Brown, Muhammad Ali, Lena Dunham, Joan Didion, Oprah Winfrey, and Henry David Thoreau all hanging out together? Answer: C
Who Stole the Funny?: A Novel of Hollywood
by Robby BensonA Hollywood insider and director of Friends delivers a scathingly brilliant and caustically comedic bird’s-eye view behind the scenes of comedy television.A wickedly delicious roman-a-clef about the making of a sitcom called My Urban Buddies, this satirical romp of a novel portrays life on the other side of the television lens, hilariously sending up self-serious Hollywood stereotypes across the board.Programmed-for-success director J. T. Baker has to bring an up-and-coming sitcom to fruition after its initial director shoots himself in the head with a nail gun. Comically annotated with helpful and enlightening Hollywood glossary terms (“Creative-type director: One who has no hope of working in this town again”; “Eccentric: Affecting a style of dress, coiffure, speech, mannerisms, etc., carefully calculated to give the impression of creative credibility”), Benson creates an exaggerated world of crazy writers; backstabbing executives, agents, and producers; foul-mouthed everyone-elses; and hardcore cynics—and the ridiculous inner monologues behind them.“An irreverent and hilarious stroll down the dark alleys of Hollywood’s TV landscape.” —Peter Bart, Editor in Chief, Variety“Who Stole the Funny? benefits from Mr. Benson’s deep knowledge of his subject matter.” —The Wall Street Journal
Who Took My Lollipop?
by Doug CenkoA devastated squirrel questions his friends about his missing lollipop in this laugh-out-loud picture book about controlling your temper. Someone took Squirrel's lollipop...and he's BIG MAD.It was pink and blue and stripey and delicious. He bought it with his own lemonade stand money!And now it's GONE!Who took it? Was it Badger? Mouse? Rabbit?! Can the lollipop thief be found before Squirrel loses his temper? Or will his friendship with the other playground animals be hurt by his anger as he madly searches for the culprit?Wacky, funny, and dramatic (but never preachy) Who Took My Lollipop? will have young readers cracking up while also exploring the subtle message about managing anger. For those who really love getting into reading aloud, this book was made for you!
Who Took the Cookbook?
by Kelly Light Paul OrshoskiThe cook in the lunchroom usually serves great food, but now her cookbook and all her recipes are missing and her food is just awful! Students join in the hunt to find her missing cookbook in this fun story with a surprise ending. This humorous title offers engaging phonics practice and fun phonics games.
Who Touched Base in my Thought Shower?: A Treasury of Unbearable Office Jargon
by Steven PooleDo you hate going forward? Do you shudder when a colleague wants to reach out? Are you disgusted by low-hanging fruit, sick of being on the team, and reluctant to open the kimono?Does the phrase blue-sky thinking make you see red?Do you really want to drill down or take a helicopter view?Are you past caring whether the key drivers are going to move the needle? Should anyone really punch a puppy?And can you bear to hear about a big hairy audacious goal?If modern office jargon makes you want to throw up, this book is for you. Taking a hilarious and scathing deep dive into the most hated and absurd examples of corporate-speak it is a come to Jesus moment for verbally downtrodden workers everywhere.
Who Touched Base in my Thought Shower?: A Treasury of Unbearable Office Jargon
by Steven PooleDo you hate going forward? Do you shudder when a colleague wants to reach out? Are you disgusted by low-hanging fruit, sick of being on the team, and reluctant to open the kimono?Does the phrase blue-sky thinking make you see red?Do you really want to drill down or take a helicopter view?Are you past caring whether the key drivers are going to move the needle? Should anyone really punch a puppy?And can you bear to hear about a big hairy audacious goal?If modern office jargon makes you want to throw up, this book is for you. Taking a hilarious and scathing deep dive into the most hated and absurd examples of corporate-speak it is a come to Jesus moment for verbally downtrodden workers everywhere.
Who Wants a Cheap Rhinoceros?
by Shel SilversteinFrom New York Times bestselling author Shel Silverstein, acclaimed creator of Where the Sidewalk Ends, The Giving Tree, A Light in the Attic, and Falling Up, comes a boy’s tribute to a perfectly unexpected pet: a rhinoceros.In this cherished classic, published for the first time at HarperCollins, Silverstein delivers a hilarious look at the joys of having a rhinoceros as your friend, with his signature humor and black-and-white artwork.Generations have grown up with the works of Shel Silverstein, known not only as a poet and illustrator, but also for his work as a cartoonist, playwright, performer, recording artist, and Grammy Award-winning songwriter. With the timeless magic of his work, Shel Silverstein has encouraged children to dream and dare to imagine the impossible with his extraordinary poetry and unforgettable characters.Need a pet? What’s the best kind to get?A dog, a cat, a frog, a rat?How about a cheap rhinoceros?He’s funny and sweet and loyal as they come.He’s huggable and lovable.So who wants a cheap rhinoceros?Maybe you!
Who Wants a Tortoise?
by Dave Keane"A sweet read-aloud for first-time tortoise owners." --Kirkus, starred reviewCould there be any better pet than a puppy? One young girl is about to find out. From beloved author Dave Keane and acclaimed illustrator K.G. Campbell, a laugh-out-loud story of unexpected friendship! When the spunky, loveable narrator receives a tortoise for her birthday, instead of the cuddly puppy she&’s longed for her entire life, she&’s more than a little disappointed. But while her new lump of a pet isn&’t what she dreamed of, it doesn&’t take long—between tortoise-on-skateboard walks, sparkly shell makeovers, and a lemonade stand selling chances to hold a real life tortoise—for the little girl to change her mind—sort of. But when her pet goes missing, all she wants is to be reunited with her new best friend.
Who Wants to Be a Pirate?: What It Was Really Like in the Golden Age of Piracy
by Bridget HeosHave you ever wanted to be a pirate? To sail the high seas in search of adventure—and maybe some buried treasure?Well, writer Bridget Heos and illustrator Daniel Duncan welcome you aboard Captain Parrot's pirate ship! Captain Parrot is here to tell you about the life of a real swashbuckler from the Golden Age of Piracy (1650-1730). From danger to the doldrums, Who Wants to Be a Pirate? has all the need-to-know facts. And don't worry about walking the plank—strap in for fun and join Captain Parrot's pirate crew!
Who Wants to Marry a Duke: Dazzling historical romance from the queen of the sexy Regency! (Duke Dynasty #3)
by Sabrina JeffriesIf you love Julia Quinn's Bridgerton, you'll fall head over heels for the family at the heart of Sabrina Jeffries' Duke Dynasty series!'Anyone who loves romance must read Sabrina Jeffries!' Lisa Kleypas, New York Times bestselling authorFrom New York Times bestselling author, and Queen of the sexy Regency romance, Sabrina Jeffries comes a sparkling new series about an oft-widowed mother's grown children, who blaze through society in their quest for the truth about their fathers . . . and in the process find that love just might conquer all . . . For fans of Sarah MacLean, Julia Quinn and Tessa Dare.'The women she writes are spirited, intelligent, devilish, brave, independent and politically and culturally savvy. They are true heroines' BookpageChemistry is everything... A past kiss with Miss Olivia Norley should be barely a memory for Marlowe Drake, the Duke of Thornstock. After all, there are countless debutantes for a handsome rakehell to charm beyond a young lady whose singular passion is chemistry - of the laboratory type. But Thorn has not forgotten - or forgiven - the shocking blackmail scheme sparked by that single kiss. Now Thorn's half-brother, Grey, has hired the brilliant Miss Norley for her scientific expertise in solving a family mystery. And the once-burned Thorn, suspicious of her motives, vows to follow her every move... For Olivia, determining whether arsenic poisoning killed Grey's father is the pioneering experiment that could make her career - and Thorn's constant presence is merely a distraction. But someone has explosive plans to derail her search. Soon the most unexpected discovery is the caring nature of the reputed scoundrel beside her - and the electricity it ignites between them...For more dazzlingly romantic and witty historical romance, don't miss Sabrina's other gorgeous series including The Sinful Suitors, The Hellions of Halstead Hall, The School for Heiresses and The Royal Brotherhood.
Who Wants to be The Prince of Darkness?
by Michael BoatmanLucifer is enjoying his retirement in an obscure corner of Limbo when he learns of a plot by Gabriel, the current ruler of Hell, to use humanity's greatest weapon against it - Television!Cue the hottest reality game-show ever conceived: Who Wants To Be The Prince Of Darkness? Gabriel orchestrates an "Infernal takeover" of Earth by stealing unwitting mortal souls and sending them to a mostly empty Hell, hoping to reinvigorate the Infernal Realm.Now Lucifer must find a living champion to seize control of Hell and free millions of stolen mortal souls before the theft becomes permanent. But who would ever want to be Hell's champion?File Under: Fantasy [ Down Among The Dead Men | Fifteen Minutes For Eternity | Damned If You Do | The Morningstar ]
Who Wants to be a Millionaire - The Quiz Book
by Sony Pictures Television UK Rights LtdHave you got what it takes? Sharpen your mind with Who Wants to be a Millionaire - The Quiz Book and see if you would win the £1,000,000 jackpotAnd remember, no cheating . . .__________Sir Seretse Khama was the first president of which country?A: BotswanaB: TanzaniaC: GhanaD: Zambia...For £1,000,000, what is your final answer?__________Only five people on UK screens have ever answered their way to the top and taken home the full cash prize.The question is, could you become a winner?Whether you're confident quizzer or trivial about trivia, Who Wants to Be a Millionaire - The Quiz Book is perfect for a solo test of knowledge or the ultimate at-home quiz with family and friends.Complete with all four life-lines and over 1,000 brand new questions, and written by brains behind the classic show, you can recreate Who Wants to Be a Millionaire from your home. Now there's only one question that really matters . . .Do you have what it takes?
Who Was Changed and Who Was Dead
by Barbara Comyns&“Comyns&’ novel is deranged in ways that shouldn&’t be disclosed.&” —Ben Marcus This is the story of the Willoweed family and the English village in which they live. It begins mid-flood, ducks swimming in the drawing-room windows, &“quacking their approval&” as they sail around the room. &“What about my rose beds?&” demands Grandmother Willoweed. Her son shouts down her ear-trumpet that the garden is submerged, dead animals everywhere, she will be lucky to get a bunch. Then the miller drowns himself . . . then the butcher slits his throat . . . and a series of gruesome deaths plagues the villagers. The newspaper asks, &“Who will be smitten by this fatal madness next?&” Through it all, Comyns' unique voice weaves a text as wonderful as it is horrible, as beautiful as it is cruel. Originally published in England in 1954, this &“overlooked small masterpiece&” is a twisted, tragicomic gem.
Who Was Charles Schulz? (Who Was?)
by Joan Holub Who HQLearn more about the cartoonist who created Charlie Brown, Snoopy, and the rest of the lovable Peanuts gang in this new addition to the #1 New York Times bestselling series!Charles (otherwise known as Sparky) Schulz always loved drawing from the time he was a young child, and as he grew older, he turned this passion into a phenomenally successful career. His early doodles of his mischievous dog and of a shy boy inspired two of his most familiar and beloved characters, Charlie Brown and Snoopy. Here's the story about Peanuts gang and Charles's life that's sure to excite all readers but especially those who love the classic cartoon series.
Who Was Chuck Jones? (Who was?)
by John Hinderliter Jim Gigliotti Who Hq"What's Up, Doc?" Find out in this lively biography of the most celebrated director in animation history!Charles Martin "Chuck" Jones was an American animator, cartoon artist, screenwriter, producer, and director of many classic animated cartoon shorts. They starred Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote, Pepé Le Pew, Porky Pig and a slew of other Warner Brothers characters. When he moved on to Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, his work includes a series of Tom and Jerry shorts as well as the television adaptation of Dr. Seuss's How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Jones was nominated for eight Academy Awards, won three, and received an honorary Oscar for his work in the animation industry. His career spanned almost seventy years, during which he made over 250 animated films, including What's Opera, Doc?, a classic Bugs Bunny/Elmer Fudd short that is considered to be one of the greatest cartoons of all time.
Who Was Lucille Ball? (Who was?)
by Pam Pollack Meg Belviso Nancy Harrison Gregory CopelandWho doesn't love Lucy? The legendary actress, producer, and comedian steps into the Who Was? spotlight.Much like her hit TV show, I Love Lucy, Americans in the 1950s fell in love with Lucy. Born in New York in 1911, Lucille Ball was always a natural performer. She danced in the chorus of Broadway shows and acted in small parts in Hollywood movies. But Ball's true gift was comedy. She found a way to showcase her gifts in 1951 when CBS gave her the chance to star in a sitcom. She based the show on her life and called it I Love Lucy. Over sixty years later, it is still one of the most loved television shows of all time. Lucille Ball became the first woman to run a major television studio, Desilu, and her comedic genius has kept people laughing for generations.
Who We Are Now: A Novel
by Lauryn ChamberlainFour friends. Fifteen years. Who We Are Now is a story of Sliding Doors moments, those seemingly small choices of early adulthood that determine the course of our lives. It is 2006 and Rachel, Clarissa, Dev, and Nate are best friends, seniors on the eve of their college graduation. Their whole lives are before them, at once full of promise and anxiety. Bound to one another as they are, they imagine their closeness will last forever—but things change as they take their first steps away from one another and into adulthood. Each year is told from one character&’s point of view, and in that way, we stride swiftly through their lives. These four friends feel their twenties and thirties flying by, and suddenly small moments fast become regrets or unexpected boons, decisions they&’ll spend years wishing they could undo and choices that come to define them. As the foursome endure professional setbacks, deep loss, and creative success, fortunes shift and friendships strain—and it will take a tragic turn of events to bring them together again. Who We Are Now is a poignant story of epic friendship that jumps boldly through the years, moving at the same unforgiving pace as does that precious, confusing time between college and real life. This novel is perfect for readers who adore tales of friendship, explorations of the second coming of age moment that arrives in our thirties, and fans of Meg Wolitzer&’s The Interestings or Dolly Alderton&’s Ghosts.
Who Wet My Pants?
by Bob SheaIn this hilarious tale of blame, compassion, and forgiveness, a very embarrassed bear is reminded that accidents can happen--but with the support of good friends, life goes on. <P><P>Reuben the bear's got donuts for everyone in his scout troop, but his friends are all staring at something else: there's a wet spot on Reuben's pants, and it's in a specific area. "WHO WET MY PANTS?" he shouts, and a blame game starts. His buddies try to reassure him there was no crime. Just an accident. It could happen to anyone! <P><P>But as all the clues begin to point in Reuben's own direction as the culprit, Reuben must come to terms with the truth. <P><P>Who Wet My Pants? isn't a potty-training book. It's a witty and wise story about embarrassment and anger, empathy and acceptance, and ultimately...forgiveness.