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You Got to Dance with Them What Brung You: Politics in The Clinton Years
by Molly IvinsIt's been five years since Molly Ivins's last book, which is probably too long a time in the opinion of her many fans. But the intervening years have given the bestselling author and syndicated columnist some of the best raw material a political writer could ask for. The Republicans staged a revolution, Clinton was reelected, welfare "deform" swept the country, and the militia movement came out of the bunker: in short, it's been a banner time for Molly's brand of shoot-from-the-hip commentary and uproarious anecdotes. You Got to Dance with Them What Brung You brings together a first-class collection of smart, spirited, and fiercely funny writings. From the wild and woolly politics of her native Texas to the waffling in the Oval Office, Molly exposes the fatuous and hypocritical at all levels of public life. Whether she's writing about the 1996 presidential candidates ("Dole contributed perhaps the funniest line of the year with his immortal observation that tobacco is not addictive but that too much milk might be bad for us. The check from the dairy lobby must have been late that week"), conspiracy theorists ("Twenty-five years in the newspaper bidness have given me a fairly strong faith in the proposition that if you haven't read about it in The Daily Disappointment or seen it on the network news, it's probably not true"), or cultural trends ("I saw a restaurant in Seattle that specialized in latte and barbecue. Barbecue and latte. I came home immediately"), Molly takes on the issues of the day with her trademark good sense and inimitable wit. "I can think of few causes more important than keeping free voices alive in a world of corporate media," Molly writes. She is one of those voices and a national treasure; as the Los Angeles Times put it, she is "H. L. Mencken without the cruelty, Will Rogers with an agenda. " Whatever your political persuasion, you're bound to agree that Molly Ivins is one of the sharpest and most original commentators on the American scene today.
You Gotta Have Cheer
by Lois MortonYou Gotta Have Cheer is full of art games, poems, stories, and best of all, whimsical cheers for school and home interaction with your kids.&“Make hand movements to clap, tap, and hand jive your own way,To set up class rules and organize your day.&”There are funny toasts and roasts. You might even insert your friends and family names to cheer them on.&“You ran for someone dear you loved,And I know she loved you on earth and above.&”Lois has had &“MOR-TONS&” of fun teaching art and has inspired hundreds of kids with her creative spirit and enthusiasm. Her poems, cheers, toasts, and stories were created along her teaching journey. Enjoy!
You Gotta Want It
by Jake Paul<p>In this extremely positive, motivational, and often laugh-out-loud memoir, Jake Paul pauses long enough from his supercharged day-to-day as a nineteen year old social media heartthrob and costar on the Disney Channel series Bizaardvark to share his takes on life, love, fame, and shooting for the moon. <p>Growing up as a regular kid in Ohio, Jake Paul always knew he wanted to do something big, but he wasn't sure what that thing was--that is, until he found his calling as one of Vine's most famous comedians. As a high school sophomore, Jake began making comedy videos with his older brother, Logan, and posting them online. With every carefully staged prank, Jake and Logan's following grew--and after a few stumbling blocks, Jake finally forged his own way. Eventually, he traded his childhood home in Cleveland for sunny, sparkling Hollywood. <p>In You Gotta Want It, Jake reflects on the path that led him to stardom. From learning the value of a disciplined work ethic, to achieving his goals and aspirations along the way to digital celebrity, to the crazy behind-the-scenes details of his journey as a creator and actor, Jake relates the most hysterical and intimate details of his life thus far--all with the signature humor, honesty, and unstoppable attitude that have won him millions of devoted followers.
You Had Me at Hockey (Bears Hockey)
by Kelly JamiesonCan a spirited, down-to-earth influencer get an uptight hockey player out of his shell?JoshI am a warrior. That&’s been my motto since I recovered from a near-death accident when I was younger. Now I enjoy my nice, settled life in Dallas playing pro hockey—a boring life is better than being dead. I&’m not a party guy or an adventurer; I like my routine and peace and quiet. So being traded to New York is the worst possible change that could happen. And meeting unfiltered and fascinating Sara Carrington throws my life into even more chaos.SaraI&’ve been considered weird my whole life, which is why I&’m still a virgin, but I&’ve turned it into a career with my YouTube videos. Who knew people would love watching me talk about my zits, taste-test meatless burgers, and try to learn TikTok dances! Now I&’m launching a podcast. Getting hockey star Josh Heller as a guest will help gain listeners for sure. I expect a bearded jock with no teeth and nothing to say, but I get a hot as H-E-double-hockey-sticks grouch with a surprisingly dirty mind. My mission to make him laugh is successful, but I want to know why he&’s so uptight underneath that panty-dropping smile. Maybe I can teach Josh to have some fun . . . and maybe he can teach me a thing or two along the way. . . . USA Today bestselling author Kelly Jamieson&’s epic Bears Hockey series can be read together or separately:MUST LOVE DOGS . . . AND HOCKEYYOU HAD ME AT HOCKEYDon&’t miss any of Kelly&’s captivating reads:The Wynn Hockey series: PLAY TO WIN • IN IT TO WIN IT • WIN BIG • FOR THE WINThe Aces Hockey series: MAJOR MISCONDUCT • OFF LIMITS • ICING • TOP SHELF • BACK CHECK • SLAP SHOT • PLAYING HURT • BIG STICK • GAME ONThe Bayard Hockey series: SHUT OUT • CROSS CHECKThe Last Shot series: BODY SHOT • HOT SHOT • LONG SHOTThe standalone novel: DANCING IN THE RAIN
You Had Me at Hola: A Novel
by Alexis Daria"I could not get enough of Jasmine and Ashton! I adored Jasmine--her ambition, her confidence, her attacks of self-doubt, and especially her hilarious, snarky, and loving cousins. She and Ashton have such a steamy, swoony, love story that I didn't want the book to end!"--Jasmine Guillory, New York Times bestselling authorRITA® Award Winning author Alexis Daria brings readers an unforgettable, hilarious rom-com set in the drama-filled world of telenovelas—perfect for fans of Jane the Virgin and The Kiss Quotient.Leading Ladies do not end up on tabloid covers. After a messy public breakup, soap opera darling Jasmine Lin Rodriguez finds her face splashed across the tabloids. When she returns to her hometown of New York City to film the starring role in a bilingual romantic comedy for the number one streaming service in the country, Jasmine figures her new “Leading Lady Plan” should be easy enough to follow—until a casting shake-up pairs her with telenovela hunk Ashton Suárez. Leading Ladies don’t need a man to be happy. After his last telenovela character was killed off, Ashton is worried his career is dead as well. Joining this new cast as a last-minute addition will give him the chance to show off his acting chops to American audiences and ping the radar of Hollywood casting agents. To make it work, he’ll need to generate smoking-hot on-screen chemistry with Jasmine. Easier said than done, especially when a disastrous first impression smothers the embers of whatever sexual heat they might have had. Leading Ladies do not rebound with their new costars. With their careers on the line, Jasmine and Ashton agree to rehearse in private. But rehearsal leads to kissing, and kissing leads to a behind-the-scenes romance worthy of a soap opera. While their on-screen performance improves, the media spotlight on Jasmine soon threatens to destroy her new image and expose Ashton’s most closely guarded secret.
You Had Me at Merlot: A vintage romantic comedy, the perfect summer read
by Lisa Dickenson'Sprinkled with humour and warmth' Cathy Bramley'Hilariously funny . . . an utterly fabulous book' Heat'Feisty, fun and fierce!' Ali McNamaraLisa's new book - My Sisters And Me - is available to pre-order NOWElle and Laurie are the last ones standing: they're single, they're not having babies any time soon and their weekends aren't filled with joyful meetings about mortgages. For Elle, this is fine. She likes her independent life, but Laurie wants love and she wants it now.So when Laurie begs Elle to come with her on a singles holiday to a beautiful vineyard in Tuscany, Elle is reluctant. She has no intention of swapping her perfectly lovely life for someone else's idea of her Mr Perfect, but ten days under the Italian sun with her best friend and lashings of wine? How bad could that be?You Had Me At Merlot is full of sultry summer nights, laugh-out-loud moments, and the odd glass of wine. Praise for Lisa Dickenson'Deliciously warm, effortlessly modern and totally irresistible . . . we lapped up every single word of this romantic comedy gem.' Heat'Cries out for the Richard Curtis film treatment' Sun'Sassy as Beyonce and warm as toast' Miranda Dickinson'Crying out to be read in one big, hilarious gulp!' Fabulous 'A lovely, light romantic yarn.' Marie Claire'Feisty, fun and fierce! Beyonce would be proud!' Ali McNamara'Fresh and hilarious . . . I can't remember the last time a book made me laugh like this . . . You will laugh, you will cry, you will go awwww and then you'll laugh all over again' Holly Martin'A fun, flirty read full of . . . sparkle and romance' Jo Thomas'The epitome of feel-good summer chick lit . . . Perfect poolside reading' The Lady
You Had Me at Merlot: Laugh out loud, wine-fueled romantic comedy that will warm your heart (You Had Me At Merlot Ser. #2)
by Lisa DickensonElle and Laurie are the last ones standing: they're single, they're not having babies any time soon and their weekends aren't filled with joyful meetings about mortgages. For Elle, this is fine. She likes her independent life, but Laurie wants love and she wants it now.So when Laurie begs Elle to come with her on a singles holiday to a beautiful vineyard in Tuscany, Elle is reluctant. She has no intention of swapping her perfectly lovely life for someone else's idea of her Mr Perfect, but ten days under the Italian sun with her best friend and lashings of wine? How bad could that be?Full of sultry summer nights, hilarious moments and plenty of adventure, You Had Me at Merlot will warm even the most cynical of hearts and have you believing in the magic of romance (and the power of a decent glass of wine).
You Have Those Wild Eyes Again, Mooch: A New MUTTS Treasury (Mutts Ser.)
by Patrick McDonnellFollow along with everyone’s favorite Jack Russell & tuxedo cat pals for another year’s worth of fun & laughs in this comic strip treasury.It’s that time of year again, when Mooch gets those wild eyes and anything can happen. In this collection of Mutts comics, Earl and Mooch go to the beach for summer vacation, welcome back new and old friends, and show us the rewards of loving an animal. Both humorous and heatfelt, this collection also touches on spaying, adoption, and endangered species.
You Have to Fucking Eat (Go the Fuck to Sleep #2): Go The Fuck To Sleep, You Have To Fucking Eat And Fuck, Now There Are Two Of You
by Adam MansbachA New York Times Best SellerOne of BookRiot's Must-Read Books from Indie Presses for 2014One of Flavorwire's 50 Best Independent Fiction and Poetry Books of 2014"You Have to F***ing Eat makes parents of picky eaters smile."--TODAY Parents"Adam Mansbach...will delight exhausted and exasperated parents everywhere for a second time with You Have to F**king Eat--another children's book that is most definitely not for children."--Entertainment Weekly"An equally hilarious ode to kids at the table."--Huffington Post"Parents, Adam Mansbach gets you. He understood that sometimes your kids just won't go the f**k to sleep. And, in his new foulmouthed bedtime book for parents out Wednesday, he understands that sometimes they just won't f**king eat. And he knows, well, it's really f**king annoying. So how about some f**king comic relief?"--GQ"A likeable variation on a universal f***ing theme."--Kirkus Reviews"A hilarious sendup of the eternal fight between kids and their parents over what to eat and when--if at all."--New York Journal of Books"If you're a frustrated parent with a picky child, or even just one who appreciates 'deranged' humor, especially humor that rhymes, this is a terrific read for you...Parents will enjoy a good chuckle and subtle reminder that everything is better, including parenthood, if tackled with a little bit of humor."--San Francisco Book Review"You Have to F**cking Eat, Sequel to Go the F**k to Sleep, Is Finally F**king Coming...It will arrive just in time to gift it to your brother-in-law, who, upon unwrapping it, will clutch it immediately to his chest and shake his head furiously at his waist-high daughter as she claws at him with her chewed up nails. 'No, no, it's not for you,' he'll say, laughing and crying at the same time."--Flavorwire"An uproarious spoof of bedtime board books."--San Francisco Chronicle"A 21st-century bedtime story for the ages (and all ages) if there ever was one."--Bay Area Reporter"Parents, when your precious angel rips you from your three hours of sleep to demand food that he won't actually eat, you'll want this f'ing book."--Mashable"Forthcoming new book by genius funnyman Adam Mansbach."--BoingBoing"Mansbach freely, fabulously curses out the uncensored truth; Brozman makes sure you'll recognize your irresistible, equitably diverse mini-mes with those all-too-familiar expressions, from utter disdain to overwhelming trust and every little eyeball roll in between."--BookDragon/Smithsonian Asian Pacific American Center"If your kid has never presented you with some new mind-boggling preference at mealtime, I suspect you're lying."--Persephone Magazine"This book is genius. It is what every parent is thinking when their child refuses dinner."--Old School/New School Mom"With this soon-to-be crude classic, Adam Mansbach has nailed it with his undeniable animal/child comparisons all cozily complimented by Owen Brozman's humorous illustration--we dare you not to giggle into your eggnog."--Curious Mom"Illustrations are just as enjoyable and the narrative again paints the perfect picture."--Roundtable ReviewsFrom the author of the international best seller Go the F*** to Sleep comes a long-awaited sequel about the other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving, and deeply cathartic, You Have to F***ing Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving moms and dads new, old, grand- and expectant, a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem.A perfect gift book like the smash hit Go the F*** to Sleep (over 1.5 million copies sold worldwide!), You Have to F***ing Eat perfectly captures Mansbach's trademark humor, which is simultaneously affectionate and radically honest. You probably shouldn't read it to your kids.
You Herd Me!: I'll Say It If Nobody Else Will
by Colin CowherdThere are really two games, the one you see and the one you don't. The way I see it, the best way to use access to both worlds is to illuminate and reveal, not idolize and adore. It's better to be wrong than to be played for a fool. - Colin Cowherd In this age of billion dollar athletic marketing campaigns, "feel good" philosophy with no connection to reality, and a Sports Media echo chamber that's all too eager swallow whatever idiotic notion happens to be in vogue at the moment, it's tough to find people who aren't afraid to say what they're really thinking. But that's where Colin Cowherd comes in. As his millions of fans on ESPN Radio and ESPNU already know, Colin is the rare sports analyst who's brave (or crazy) enough to speak his mind--even if it pisses some people off. Of course, it helps that a lot of what Colin has to say is simply hilarious. Lots of writers can tell you about Boston's storied sports history. But how many can tell you why the city of Boston is America's five year old? Lots of writers will brag about the stuff they got right, but how many will happily list all the calls they got completely and utterly wrong? Whether he's pointing out the stupidity of conspiracy theories, explaining why media bias isn't nearly as big a deal as many assume, or calling out those who prize short term wins over sustainability, Colin is smart, thought-provoking, and laugh-out-loud funny. Some of the questions he's not afraid to ask in You Herd Me! include: Is Tiger Woods really a sex addict--or does he just have good PR?Is "work-life balance" really the ideal we should all strive for--or is that just a way for people feel better about mediocrity?Is talent really all it's cracked up to be--or can too much talent actually be counterproductive?Is the X games really a sport--or would we all be better off if we admitted it's something else entirely?Is Hell really a supernatural place of fire and brimstone--or is it actually just another word for living in Tampa? Unapologetically entertaining and packed with behind-the-scenes insights you won't get anywhere else, You Herd Me! is unlike any other sports book ever written.
You Know it Makes Sense: Lessons from the Derek Trotter School of Business (and life)
by Derek 'Del TrotterAu Revois!The name’s Trotter, Derek Trotter, and the world of business is my speciality. When it comes to the art of closing deals I’ve been around the track more times than a lurcher. Not only have I been there, done it and bought the t-shirt, I’ve gone back round to do it again, printed my ownt-shirts, knocked ‘em out at ridiculously low prices and cut the competition out of the market. But the commodities game ain’t all champagne and skittles. It’s a rocky road full of potholes, speed cameras, people who don’t indicate, mouthy cyclists, and all sorts of obstacles designed to get on your tits. You Know It Makes Sense is the definitive business guide, designed pacifically to help steer you in the right direction. Packed full of insider knowledge, tips and warnings, think of it as your personal stat-nav on the corporate highway. And whether you’re a Director, middle management, a junior staff hotshot, or the one that fetches the sandwiches, it will help you get to where you’re going.
You Know Me Al: A Busher's Letters (classic Reprint) (Dover Thrift Editions: Classic Novels)
by Ring LardnerIn the early decades of the twentieth century, newspaperman and humorist Ring Lardner (1885-1933) made America laugh with his hilarious depictions of odd characters in the sporting world, Tin Pan Alley, and Hollywood. His first great success was You Know Me Al, a fictional series of letters from a popular baseball hero to his friend, slyly revealing the letter writer as a crude, conceited, semiliterate, self-deceiving boob.The letters, created while Lardner was writing a sports column for The Chicago Tribune, first appeared in The Saturday Evening Post and were later published in book form in 1918. You Know Me Al reveals Lardner as a satirical master at the peak of his form: a fine albeit misanthropic storyteller with a superb feel for the niceties of characters and speech and a sure instinct for provoking laughter.
You Know Who's Awesome?: (Not You.)
by Ted FoxEver stop and think, Everyone is just so awesome?Didn't think so.It's just a fact--most people aren't. But that doesn't stop them from thinking that they are. And that shouldn't stop you from mocking them. In fact, it should just encourage you.Here's your thumbs up to giving the thumbs down to everyone and everything that's far from awesome and, really, just plain awful.
You Know Who's Awesome?
by Ted FoxEver stop and think,Everyone is just so awesome? Didn't think so. It's just a fact-most people aren't. But that doesn't stop them from thinking that they are. And that shouldn't stop you from mocking them. In fact, it should just encourage you. Here's your thumbs up to giving the thumbs down to everyone and everything that's far from awesome and, really, just plain awful.
You Know Who's Awesome?
by Ted Fox Ryan HannusEver stop and think, Everyone is just so awesome? Didn't think so. It's just a fact--most people aren't. But that doesn't stop them from thinking that they are. And that shouldn't stop you from mocking them. In fact, it should just encourage you. Here's your thumbs up to giving the thumbs down to everyone and everything that's far from awesome and, really, just plain awful.
You Know You're 50 When...: The Quiz of Your Lifetime
by Mike HaskinsA fun and nostalgic quiz book to help you look back at your fifty years with fond memories – or to test what you’ve forgotten! Congratulations! You’re 50! You’re halfway to a century! You’ve lived through spacehoppers, chopper bikes, Star Wars (three times!), yuppies, New Romantics, Madchester and every generation of mobile phone issued so far. What do you mean you don’t remember any of them? That’s the problem, isn’t it? Life rushes by and there’s so little time to dwell on all its riches and details. Then, when you look back, you find you can’t remember much further than what you had for breakfast this morning.So that’s where this handy volume comes in. It’s what you’ve been waiting for all these years. This is the quiz book that will get your 50-year-old synapses firing to find out how much attention you were paying to not only these but all the other fads, events and characters of your lifetime.So what are you waiting for? Let’s take a quizzical look back at your life.
You Know You're 60 When...: The Quiz of Your Lifetime
by Mike HaskinsCongratulations! You're 60! You're halfway to being the oldest person who ever lived! But how much of the past 60 years can you remember?You've lived through the summer of love, the moon landings, Ronnie and Maggie, Den and Angie and the entire history of the internet.This is the quiz book that will give your 60-year-old brain cells a nostalgic workout to find out how much attention you were paying to the events, characters and fads of your lifetime.So what are you waiting for? Let's take a quizzical look back at your life.
You Know You're 60 When ...
by Richard SmithPerfect for a growing (and graying) audience, this hilarious collection of quips and one-liners on the trials, travails, and perks of reaching 60 is illustrated throughout with comic line drawings. It makes a must-have, must-give birthday present for every soon-to-be-60 American.
You Know You're a Child of the 2000s When… (You Know You're ... Ser.)
by Charlie EllisTrucker caps, Crazy Frog, SM:TV Live and Sunny D – growing up in the 2000s was sweet. So why not take yourself back to a time when McFly were ruling the charts and Snake 2 was the coolest thing in mobile gaming, to discover if you really are a true child of the 2000s.
You Know You're a Child of the 2000s When… (You Know You're ... Ser.)
by Charlie EllisTrucker caps, Crazy Frog, SM:TV Live and Sunny D – growing up in the 2000s was sweet. So why not take yourself back to a time when McFly were ruling the charts and Snake 2 was the coolest thing in mobile gaming, to discover if you really are a true child of the 2000s.
You Know You're a Gardening Fanatic When... (You Know You're ... Ser.)
by Ben FraserYou know you're a gardening fanatic when... ... you favour your ride-on lawnmower over your Ferrari. ... you think talking dirty means whispering the word 'compost'. If this sounds all too familiar, read on to discover whether you've really gone to seed or you're just one petal short of a flower!
You Know You're a Video Game Addict If . . .
by Ryan G. Van CleaveDid you know that one hundred million Americans game over three billion hours a week? One in three British males would rather play video games than have sex with their partner. Gaming isnOCOt just a pastime anymore, but an actual epidemic So whether youOCOre the one gaming or are a parent to/dating a gamer, like it or not weOCOre all in the gaming world. Packed with trivia questions, hilarious illustrations, and hard-to-believe fun facts, "You Know YouOCOre a Video Game Addict If" . . . is a hysterical guide to one of AmericaOCOs most widespread addictions. aa"
You Know You're a Writer When . . .
by Adair LaraA collection of reflections on the nature of what it means to be a writer. How do you find out what being a writer means to those who really are writers? You ask them. In this book, Adair Lara shares what the ink-stained, carpal-tunneled, slightly dazed, word struck people she knows had to say. You know you&’re a writer when . . . . . . You&’ll never forgive your parents for your happy childhood. . . . The doctor tells you that you have terminal cancer, and you think, &“I can use this.&” . . . You accidentally sign a check with your pen name. . . . You know more than ten synonyms for &“blue.&” . . . You write your Christmas letter as if it were War and Peace. Many readers will recognize themselves in this collection of observations about the eccentric, quirky, word-obsessed condition that is being a writer.
You Know You're Fifty When
by Richard SmithRichard Smith's wildly popular books have made America laugh about everything from wedding-night jitters to weight loss. Now he turns his comic talent to a subject he's about to experience himself: climbing the half-century hill.Over the next 15 years, 45 million baby boomers will celebrate their 50th birthdays. With Smith as their guide, the Boomers will know exactly what lies ahead. Not only does turning 50 mean you survived your 40s, but you get to join the AARP, answer your front door in bedroom slippers, and spend your kid's inheritance on liposuction. You also know you're 50 when...Your main form of aerobic exercise is getting up to change the channelAn obscene phone call makes you chuckleYou think a mosh pit is something found at the center of an exotic fruitYou wonder who'll die first--you or your moneyYou wish the "ol' ticker" had a quartz movement"Performance anxiety" refers to your golf gameWith 200 of these cleverly illustrated clues and quips as well as comparison charts, entertaining graphs, and hilarious lists, You Know You're 50 When... will be the must-have, must-give birthday present for every soon-to-be-50 American.From the Trade Paperback edition.
You Know You've Been in Japan Too Long...
by Bill MutranowskiThis book is for anyone who can read English (and even if you can't, you can always look at the pictures) and especially for those who already know a little something about Japan (I guarantee that it will confuse you even more). But it is dedicated to all those trailblazing expatriates who have been crazy enough to actually try and live alongside the natives in this very (insert favorite stereotype here) country. I like to think that the mere presence of we foreigners in their Montana-sized enclave is a spur to Japan's own efforts to "internationalize". That's a holy grail of an objective that the Japanese seem hellbent on realizing. Problem is, they haven't yet defined for themselves whatit means. But they'll figure it out someday. And when they do, with luck, they'll realize that they have more in common with the rest of the world, i.e., gaijin, than not.